Chapter 35
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
Selena
A gentle hand brushed my hair off my face.
“Selena...”
I shifted, trying to wake up and orient myself. Hands kneaded my right foot and I groaned, snuggling back into the cushion beneath my head. I was exhausted, and the cocoon of warmth encouraged me to stay in bed.
I started to drift off again as I enjoyed the gentle massage.
Someone dragged the blanket away and I whimpered at the touch of the cool air.
“Selena. You need to get up and have something to eat. If you are still tired afterward, we will come right back to bed,” Xylo coaxed, his deep voice low and gentle.
The hands on my foot stopped their massage. One wrapped around my ankle as the other traced tickling circles on the arch of my foot. I squealed, instantly awake, trying to jerk my foot away.
“Stop!” I begged between laughs.
The lights were off and the curtains at half mast, casting the room in shadow. Low light streamed from the terrarium onto the couch where I lay. Xylo sat beside my head with Odelm beside him. Both watched in shock as Kaede tickled my foot.
I squealed again. “Stop. Stop! Okay, okay...” I writhed on the couch.
“Are you going to stay awake and go to dinner as Xylo asked?” Kaede questioned, still attacking my foot with his fingers.
“Yes! Yes...” I gasped.
He stopped tickling and released my ankle. Then he and Xylo helped me sit up as I tried to catch my breath. I looked at him in surprise. He hadn’t replaced his visor. I was shocked he’d allowed Xylo and Odelm to see his face, though maybe that meant he was finally—
A violent kick to my ribcage made me hiss at the sharp pain.
“What’s wrong?” Kaede asked, his voice panicked.
“My cubs decided to help you wake me up with a swift kick to the ribs,” I explained between gasps. “Want to feel?”
I glanced at him. His focus was on my hands rubbing my stomach. Kaede’s gaze met mine before he turned to my nestmates.
“You’d allow it?”
“It’s not our decision. It’s hers.”
His gaze still focused on both Odelm and Xylo. “But it’s okay if I touch her stomach?”
I eyed both of my nestmates and waited for their response.
Xylo’s eyes fell to the gloved hands on Kaede’s knees.
“I do not see why you are asking now. Selena already permitted you to have your hands on her and has offered again.”
Odelm watched Kaede intently.
“Odelm and I have been blessed to feel the life growing within her. If she is permitting you to experience it, I suggest you seize the opportunity before it is revoked.”
Kaede lowered himself onto the floor and shuffled over to kneel in front of me. His eyes were glued to my stomach as he gingerly placed his hands on it.
At that precise moment, my cubs moved, kicking powerfully at Kaede’s hands. I bit my lip to remain quiet, not wanting Kaede to think he’d caused me pain.
The black-slits of his neon eyes dilated as his thin black lips parted in wonder. The room remained silent as we watched Kaede. The mood was contented, calm—and it was not Odelm manipulating our emotions. I smiled as peace swept over me.
This was the type of moment I’d always yearned for.
When my cubs finally stilled, Kaede reluctantly removed his hands. He gave me a grateful smile. “Thank you for allowing that. I would never have imagined I could experience something like that—especially in my profession.”
I smirked. “You’d better get used to having a lot of firsts with me around. I’m having three cubs. I’m going to need a lot of help handling them.”
“I’m willing to experience whatever firsts you’re willing to give me.”
He stood and reached out his gloved hand to help me up from the couch. The sudden change in position made me dizzy, and I swayed. Kaede grabbed my hips to steady me.
“You okay?” Kaede asked, worried.
I nodded then glanced at Xylo standing beside Odelm. “I’m so over this pregnancy. The first time I see my cubs’ sire I’m going to kick him in the genitals for doing this to me.”
Kaede chuckled. “You may not want to do that.”
“Why not? He had his fun then left me alone with the pain and inconvenience of the results.”
His tongue flickered as he smirked at me. “Well, I’ll certainly enjoy watching you try.”
I rolled my eyes at him. “Now that I’m awake and standing, can we go eat?”
Kaede jerked his hands away from my hips and backed up, glancing at my nestmates.
“I’ll need to put my visor back on before we leave the suite.”
“Of course. Do what you need to, and I’ll go get ready. We can all have dinner together.”
As I leaned against the corner of the bathtub with my arms resting on the edge of the tub, I considered the evening.
The conversation over dinner had been light.
We’d settled on Kaede staying in the bedroom closest to the common room and main door.
He’d registered himself to our suite and gotten it approved by the princes, then transferred the rest of his belongings.
I knew he wanted that room as a first line of defense if anyone forced an entry—though it worried me that he felt he needed to prepare for an attack or an abduction. Until now, it hadn’t really sunk in that having me on the ship posed such a risk.
My nestmates hadn’t questioned Kaede or me about why he’d had his visor off nor why we were in the bedroom together. I wondered if they’d had a chat while I slept, or if they’d decided to let it go so Kaede would not be uncomfortable.
I glanced over at Xylo beside me, his vines floating on the surface of the water.
Odelm soaked in the center of the tub—its deepest part—his tentacles waving lazily in the water.
He’d dropped one of the soaps he’d used before into the water, and the purple bubbles made their drifting appendages look funny—almost like the snakes or sea dragons I’d read about in my studies of Earth.
When my nestmates decided to team up to wash me, Odelm focused on my lower half, while Xylo concentrated on my upper.
To my surprise, I experienced none of the arousal that had been present any time they touched me.
Whether an intentional massage or an accidental graze of my breasts, until now any contact with them had been highly arousing.
I thought about that and realized I hadn’t been aroused, not once, since I’d claimed Odelm last night.
Instead, I felt cherished and cared for. Even when Kaede had massaged my feet earlier, it felt wonderful on my aching feet, but there had been no excitement. When he’d held me, I’d felt comforted and safe.
I wondered if it had something to do with nearing the end of my pregnancy.
Xylo and the healers were convinced it would be closer to the usual fifty-day Aldawi gestation period, rather than the normal human 280-day gestation.
Thank the Stars! Which meant I could be as few as eight days from delivery.
After our relaxing bath, Xylo assisted me out of the tub and Odelm dried me off. Together we went into the bedroom and they helped me into bed, tucking one of the silver blankets around me.
As I lay in contented silence, Odelm closed the curtains and turned off the lights, the room lit only by Xylo’s nebulae and galaxies and the spots on my arms. After a few moments, Odelm’s violet speckles became visible.
They gradually brightened until they’d reached the brightness of Xylo’s patterns.
“Why do your speckles take a while to start glowing while Xylo’s and mine instantly do?” I asked.
Odelm looked down at me.
His ombre anemone hair glowed brightly as it rested on his shoulders. Pale violet spots glowed along with the edges of his fins and blades and the tips of his tentacles. His pale green eyes met mine.
“Wudox have no control over their bioluminescence glow—it simply glows. But the Ulax can control when each of their bioluminescent parts glow. Typically, we only turn the glow on when we are deep diving or in dark caves where we need to see. But since you both glow and you enjoy seeing it, I decided to turn mine on and join you.”
Xylo lay down on my right, covering himself with a blanket and wrapping his vines across mine. Odelm followed his lead and allowed his closest tentacles to rest on top of my blanket.
I smiled, unbelievably content. My nestmates treated me well and made me feel so cared for.
“I don’t know what I did to deserve you both.” I sighed.
They both rolled to face me.
“What do you mean?” Xylo questioned, sounding confused.
I rolled my eyes. “You tell me. I thought you couldn’t get out of my head.”
Odelm chuckled as Xylo replied, “I cannot, but that does not mean I constantly listen. I would not be able to get any work done if I listened to every thought you had.”
“It is the same with me. I cannot prevent myself receiving strong emotions, but I try to mute all your minor ones. I would love to study what makes you feel each one, but you deserve privacy—especially since you cannot reciprocate.”
“He cannot filter strong emotions. I cannot filter loud thoughts. We both are fully capable of communicating with you. I have noticed you have grown comfortable speaking Galactic Common aloud and I am proud of you. But you must not feel afraid to speak with us mentally or call out to us when you need us,” Xylo cautioned.
I understood what he was telling me. I hadn’t been using our connection to communicate with them both telepathically. Doing so was a significant part of their society, and I needed to fit in whatever ways I could—I was already at a disadvantage being human and not having any extra appendages.
“I promise I’ll use our connection to communicate with you both more often. But to explain what I meant earlier, you both treat me so wonderfully. I feel spoiled with all the attention. I know you both feel it’s part of your job as nestmates, but I’m afraid I’m not giving enough back,” I whispered.
They scooted closer to me and each wrapped an arm around me, their tentacles and vines shifting out of the way.
Serenity spread from Odelm as he whispered in my ear, “You give us so much. I have you as my nestqueen and Xylo as my nestbrother. Soon I will be a co-father to three cubs. You grounded me—gave me stability. You allow me everything I have ever wanted and even that I never thought to dream of... Do not ever think such thoughts. I should be thanking you.”
“Odelm is right, Selena. We keep telling you... we are considered oddities that no one would want. You have granted us the bliss of having a nestqueen and give us so much more than any Circuli nestqueen would have. Our future may be unclear at the moment, but we will face it together as a clan.”
Something clicked within me, as if the pieces suddenly fell into place. I realized what I had been feeling this whole time.
I tugged on the golden threads that connected me to each of them.
“I love you. I love you both. I don’t know why it took me so long to realize that’s what I’ve been feeling... It seems so obvious now. I don’t know how I would be able to live without either of you—nor do I want to find out. But I am in love with the both of you.”
They squeezed me tighter, rubbing their heads into my hair.
“I have loved you since the night you claimed me,” Xylo’s deep mental voice rumbled, thick with emotion.
“And I knew I loved you the moment you court-bonded me. The envy and yearning I had been feeling vanished, and my love for you blossomed and has grown since then,” Odelm’s light tenor declared.
Odelm traced a few spots on my cheeks.
“It seems Selena got your bioluminescent glow, nestbrother, and my ability to color shift. Her spots morphed from white to the purple of love and passion when she told us she loved us.”
I gasped, holding an arm up to look. Odelm was right. All my white spots were now purple.
“Is this permanent?” I asked, awed.
“It should not be. Ulax only change their color when intentionally camouflaging or involuntarily as a result of extreme emotion,” Xylo explained as he traced the spots on my right arm.
“This proves that you love us,” Odelm whispered, settling back onto his side with a smile.
“Did I need to prove it?” I asked in a shocked tone.
Xylo’s fingers stilled on my arm. “He is teasing you. If I was able to feel the emotion in your declaration, then he felt it even more.”
He settled back beside me, and a contented silence fell upon us as they cuddled me between them.
I felt my lids becoming heavy.
“I love you both for who you are.”
“You honor me.”
“You’re my everything.”