Chapter 6
My dick loves him, and he makes me bacon. —Milo Warner
“Well, well, well. Got a roommate, then?”
“I do. For the moment.” I look around the loft bedroom of the cabin, which is decorated in soft beige and dark green paint, as I pull my clothes on.
Because Mia works long days in her office, early mornings are usually the only time of day she has a minute to talk on the phone.
I like to put in my earbuds and chat with her while I’m getting dressed and ready for the day. “So far it’s going okay.”
“Interesting. Then again, it’s been less than a week, right?”
“Yeah. And honestly, there’s been so much setup work at the center, it feels like all we do is paint and build boxed furniture together.
He’s been cooking for us a lot, though. Turns out he loves to cook.
Last night it was pasta, and he made the sauce from scratch.
Says when he has more time, he’ll make homemade pasta too. Maybe even his lasagna.”
Noah’s cooking is delicious, actually, and I’ve told him that.
I’ve never found time to learn how to cook.
In New York I had a meal service deliver to me, and here in Vermont I’ve mostly lived off the kindness of my friends.
“We’ve been working our asses off,” I tell Mia.
“We’re taking a break today. Gabe invited the whole crew over for a campfire cookout so they can officially meet Noah. Oh, and Bear.”
“Right. Because you and your new roommate adopted a dog together,” Mia says, and I don’t miss the teasing tone in her voice.
“We did not adopt a dog. I just told the humane society that I’d watch a dog until they found a home for her, and the dog happens to be staying with both of us. That’s it. Don’t get it twisted, Mia.”
“Hmmm. Sure. I’m just pointing out that you’re not exactly a guy who likes to share his space. Are you sure this is the same brother of mine who staged a one-man protest in his college dorms because someone tried to turn his single into a double?”
“That was a bait and switch on the college’s part, and the roommate they wanted to put me with snored,” I remind her.
But she’s not wrong. I’ve lived alone most of my adult life, and I like it that way.
With how public facing my mother’s always been, I don’t tend to enjoy having people up in my business, even the people I’m dating.
And Mia knows that, dammit.
“So yeah, I probably should have said no when Noah suggested we both just stay here together.” I finish buttoning up my jeans and sit back down on the bed, frowning as I consider the moment when I agreed to this…
arrangement. “I don’t know, Mia. Something about the way he asked just had me saying yes.
It was like my soul left my body or something. ”
Mia snorts. “Sounds more like he hits that part of you, bro. That part you’re determined to keep locked up. Either that or your dick took control of your mouth.”
I burst out laughing. “Okay, I hear that. Look, Noah does hit some of my buttons, okay? But we both know why those buttons can’t get pressed.”
“Brad,” Mia hisses under her breath. No one can hate your ex like your sister, I swear.
“Look, of course I’ve got Brad on my mind right now.
But he’s not the only thing I’m thinking about.
There’s also the fact that Noah’s barely out of college.
And fuck, Mia, he’s Stan Hardaway’s son.
We both know the shit he’s been through.
Even if his dad wasn’t about to run for office against Ma, I’d never want to cause him any kind of trouble.
And trouble seems to follow me around lately. ”
Mia sighs unhappily. “I wish you’d tell Ma how much everything that went down in New York is still eating at you, brother. Ma always wants us to be happy above all else.”
“Pretty sure she figured out I wasn’t doing too well when I ran away to the sticks,” I remind Mia. “Ma felt terrible when everything happened, sis. I don’t need to keep adding to her guilt.”
“I get that,” Mia murmurs. “And honestly, M, I’m not sure what to say here.
On the one hand, it’s low-key great to hear you like…
excited about basically anything at all.
You’re acting more like the Milo I know than you have in months.
But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried right now.
The last time you dipped your toe deep into Ma’s world, things didn’t end so well, you know?
But now here you are, dipping in the other foot. ”
I groan. “You know I thought about that when I suggested we hire Noah.”
“But you did it anyway.”
“Of course I fucking did,” I tell her indignantly. “This job’s perfect for him. He needed it.”
Mia laughs loudly. “Ah, there’s my brother. Always the knight in shining armor.”
I’d start arguing with her, but there’s no point.
Because she’s not wrong. I always have loved saving the day.
I went into medicine to make people feel better, and the part of that job that makes it sing loudest for me will always be seeing the light in a patient’s eyes when I tell them I’ve got a way to fix whatever ails them.
Hence those damn buttons Noah presses right down on. I liked stepping in front of Noah that day in Albany. And I enjoy being the one who’s helping him find the next steps of his life right now. No point in denying how I’m built, whatever people like Brad might say.
“Bro, you know I’m here anytime you need to talk. Just keep your dick under control,” Mia says.
“Look, my dick’s going to get itself under control,” I tell her.
“I’ve only got a few months left here. Right after the leaf festival and the community center launch, I’ll come back to New York.
Then I’ll…” I stand and walk over to the dresser, where that damn fortune’s sitting.
The one Jack sent me the day I suggested we hire Noah.
The one I fished back out of the trash right after I fired it into the can.
You will find the change you seek.
What the fuck am I going to do when I go back to New York? Go back to practicing medicine there, just like nothing ever happened? I know that’s what Mia and Ma expect me to do. Too bad the thought of my cold, empty apartment gives me mental hives.
“Jack and Sam think maybe I just need a break from orthopedics,” I tell Mia.
Jack Lancer and Sam Evers are the sole reason I’m even in Devon Falls.
The three of us all met back in residency and quickly got tight with each other.
Jack is from here, and not long after he moved back to Vermont to help his mom run her family practice, Sam followed him.
“They’re convinced moving specialties and doing something like what they’re both doing up here could be what I need.
But I’m not so sure. They’ve both found their places here in the Falls.
They like the pace of the family practice, and they both found people they love. I’m happy for them.”
And I mean that. After what Jack and Sam each went through in New York, no one wanted them to find happiness up here in Vermont more than me. “But I don’t see myself loving the life of diagnosing cases of strep throat all day long like they are, you know? That just isn’t me.”
“Adrenaline junkie,” Mia teases. She’s not wrong there.
It was always the adrenaline rush of the operating room that got me excited to wake up in the morning and moving to pick up that scalpel.
That same adrenaline is what makes me jump into relationships at one hundred miles an hour, relationships that always end up disappointing me.
Because the thing about being an adrenaline junkie?
Sometimes you crash right off the mountain you’re climbing.
“Milo?” A voice calls up the stairs into the loft. “I made some coffee. Oh, and eggs. And bacon. Do you eat bacon? I don’t think I’ve cooked it for you before.”
“Your dick loves him, and he makes you bacon?” Mia says.
“Yes, Mia. My dick loves him, and he makes me bacon. Funny.” My eyes drift back to that fortune, where it’s still sitting on the dresser. “Too bad he’s as off-limits as that peanut butter pie in the Brooklyn Best Eats Diner.”
“You could figure out how to eat just one piece. I do.”
“Sis, I keep telling you. There is no point in eating that pie unless I can have at least four slices.” Mia laughs. “Listen, Mia. I’ve got things under control here, I swear. I’ll let you know when I’ve got more plans for my grand return to the city. Love you.”
“Love you too. And Milo? Take care of yourself while you’re still up there, please? Not just everyone else. You.”
I frown as I end the call, still staring at that fortune. I finally flip it upside down before I start my jog down the stairs.
Noah’s standing in the kitchen, next to the island, humming along to some tune that must be playing in the earbud he’s got in one ear, as he pats bacon down with paper towels.
“Milo! Hi!” He taps the earbud before he pulls it out and sets it down on the counter.
“I’ve got coffee ready for both of us. I wasn’t sure how you liked your eggs, so I just went with scrambled.
And do you like bacon?” I nod, and he sets a few slices on a plate that he quickly slides across the counter.
“Thanks, Chucks,” I murmur as I sit down. Noah flashes me a grin. He’s wearing a shirt that says My Puns are Koala-Tea, with, of course, a picture of a koala on it. He pours coffee into a mug and hands it to me, looking slightly hesitant.
Noah Hardaway cares what I think. About him, about his food, about his work here at the center.
All that has become clear in the short time we’ve worked together.
I take a sip, and I resolve to make sure he’s not getting too attached to my appraisal or affirmation.
Attachment is the exact opposite of what the two of us need to be forming here.
I take a sip. The coffee’s exactly how I like it. Black, but not bitter. Strong, but not sharp. There’s a hint of something there… cinnamon, maybe? I can’t quite place it.
Dammit. My dick likes his bacon and his coffee.
But more than that, I like this. All of this.
Every single morning I’ve woken up in this cabin before today has felt silent and empty, just like my apartment back in New York.
Now the place is filled with Noah’s humming, Bear’s quick barks when she yips in her sleep, unspoken puns, and the scent of some of the best damn coffee I’ve had in my life.
And Noah Hardaway’s wide eyes as he waits for my judgement of his work.
I can do this. I can do what I promised Mia, and Ma, and myself.
I can keep my head together here. I know I can.
But I can also appreciate what’s happening right now, can’t I?
I can let myself enjoy these few months I have here in Devon Falls, with Noah.
Shit, I’ve worked hard my whole life. I paid some dues to the universe back in New York.
Doesn’t that same universe owe me a little good coffee and company?
“Chucks,” I tell Noah. “This is the best damn coffee I’ve had in my whole life.”
His face lights up like it’s Christmas, and I swear, so does my whole heart.