Chapter 50
CHAPTER FIFTY
Declan
Disoriented. I am.
Blurry. And… so pretty.
She’s so pretty standing there but she’s also a bit blurry.
“You’re so pretty. I love you so much.”
Evie’s smile grows into a sunburst.
“I’m…” I force my eyelids open wider, which takes effort. “I’m so tired.”
“You’re in the hospital surgical recovery unit. You were shot by Katrina Trundle and they had to bring you in to fix you up.”
Her words slowly penetrate my brain. It’s sluggish, muddy. I’m at the hospital. I was… shot.
Awareness clicks in my head and I jolt, trying to sit up. “Where’s Charlie? Is he okay? Are you okay? What about Grant?”
“No, love, don’t sit up yet.”
Evie’s hands are gentle and insistent, and when I swing my head to the other side of the bed, Ma’s there.
“Hey, Ma.”
“Hi, Dec. Charlie is just fine. He’s at home with Clementine. And Grant is in the waiting room. Everyone’s very eager to see you.”
Her voice is soft and soothing. It’s the voice from childhood when we were sick or had a nightmare. It’s the voice that says, “everything is going to be okay.”
“Good. Thank God.” My eyes shut with relief, and exhaustion, and likely lingering anesthesia drugs pull at me. I force my eyes back open and look to Evie. “You?”
“I’m just fine. And I’m so glad you’re okay.” She brushes her fingers across my forehead.
My eyes shut again. “I’m so tired.”
“You can sleep a bit. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
That’s all I need to know for now.
Six hours later, I’m settled into my room somewhere else in the hospital and my parents have just left, along with Grant, Eirinn, and Davis. They were all looking haggard, so I sent them home. I need to convince Evie to go, too.
“Will you please go home? I’m fine here, and you need sleep. You need to see Charlie and sleep.”
“Are you seriously bossing me around from a hospital bed? You Ryan boys…” She shakes her head, then bends to kiss my cheek. “I’m not leaving you alone.”
I hate to admit it, but I’m satisfied by this as much as I want her to go get some rest. She is beautiful and bedraggled, which tells me she needs to sleep at home.
“Promise me you’ll—”
“Knock knock!” Finn tips his head in, then May pops up next to him and adds, “Yeah, knock knock!”
They both enter but glance back at the door.
“Hey, guys, good to see you.” My impulse is to stand, but that’s not happening just yet.
“So, we brought a surprise with us.” Finn is ineffectively stifling a smile and glances at the door yet again.
Maybe they’ve brought Charlie? But they would’ve checked with Evie.
“Okay…” I look to Evie to see if she knows what this is, but she shrugs.
Then in walks Mac.
He’s a storm cloud when he enters, just like he always has been. Darker features, darker eyes so they’re almost navy, and a deep tan on his face, ears, neck, and forearms. Everywhere I can see. I’ll need to talk to him about sun safety yet again, I see.
“You didn’t have to come.”
It trips out of me in a choked string of words only barely masking tears. I’m not easily moved to cry, but this post-nearly-dying phase of life may have different standards.
One is certainly my big brother coming to see me after staying away for too long.
He doesn’t stop until he’s right next to me. In one fluid movement as though he’s been in this room a hundred times, he slides a chair forward, takes a seat, and clasps my hand.
“If you wanted me to visit, you could’ve just called.”
I laugh, then wince, holding my side. He grimaces.
“I was a touch occupied the last bit.” I gesture to my lovely hospital gown.
He shakes his head. “Always needing attention.”
Finn cackles at this, and May giggles. Mac glances over his shoulder at them with a fond expression, then back to me.
“I’m on duty for being in harm’s way. Me and the big boy. You’re supposed to be safe now.”
His hard look only makes me want to cry more.
“The big boy” is Grant, of course. He’s trying to tell me now I’m out of the Army, I shouldn’t be the one getting shot.
I can’t explain why this makes me afraid for him, but it does.
And for Grant, whose job in law enforcement naturally makes him more at risk.
I don’t like that either of them are at greater risk.
“Yeah. Well. That woman tried to kill my wife, and I couldn’t have that.”
A low, gruff laugh tumbles out, though I can hardly see a smile behind his beard. “Guess not.” He looks to Evie.
Her eyes are shining, and tears have already tracked down her face. She knows what this means—for me, and for the entire family.
“I’m Evie. It’s so nice to meet you, Mac.” She stands and holds her hand out to him.
My stoic, solitary brother stands and wraps his arms around her. “Welcome to the family. I’m sorry I missed the wedding.”
Regret and maybe guilt flash across her face. “I’m so sorry we couldn’t do it when you were available. I was—”
“No apologies. I’m sorry I missed, but glad to be here now.” He holds her gaze for a moment, and she nods.
Glad to see she’s not any stronger against his orders than most of the rest of us.
A familiar voice drifts in from the hallway and my heart rate picks up. All of us turn our attention to the door as Clementine walks in carrying Charlie.
My heart bursts, then glows with so much love for this little person I can hardly breathe. Evie rises and goes to greet him, kissing his cheeks and accepting him from Clementine, who tucks herself near the door.
Evie comes toward me and Charlie’s feet kick, his arms reaching for me.
“Dada! Hi, Dada. Charlie miss you.” He launches himself toward me and I reach for him, but it’s Evie and Mac who keep him from accidentally kicking me in the gut.
“We have to be careful with Dada, okay?” she says, giving me a desperate look.
He can rip me open for all I care. The sweet hit of relief and love and gratitude like I’ve never known envelops me as Charlie’s chubby little arms squeeze my neck. He plants a drooly kiss on my cheek, then giggles and pats it.
“Scratchy, huh? Yeah, I haven’t shaved today.”
“Silly Dada.” He shakes his head, butting against mine, all while Mac and Evie still keep him from resting fully on my chest.
“I’m so glad to see you, Charlie. Thank you for coming to visit me.”
“Miss you.” His little brow furrows.
“I missed you. I love you so much.” My breath catches as a flash of him screaming in the back seat while Katrina held Evie at gunpoint crosses my mind.
“Love you, too.”
This brings me back, and Finn, May, and Clementine audibly “awwww.”
Evie swipes away a tear.
Mac clears his throat. “Let’s get you settled next to your da.”
He helps Evie settle Charlie next to me on his side, which is a touch farther away from one of my incisions.
“This is my brother, Mac. He’s your uncle,” I tell Charlie.
“Oh, hi.” Charlie raises a hand to wave at Mac.
He smiles behind his beard, dark eyes soft. “Hi there.”
Something about this makes me feel so incredibly complete.
Now he knows Evie and Charlie. They know him.
He’ll get to check in with Ma and Da and talk to Grant.
Meet Sam. See the girls again. He’ll get a chance to catch up with Finn and see May and maybe he’ll even have an idea of what’s going on with Eirinn and Davis.
“How long are you here?” It won’t be long.
“I’m not going anywhere for now.” He shifts his gaze to Evie. “I’ll stay if you’d like to go rest.”
Her eyes find mine.
“Please go rest. I’m good here.”
She smiles. “I know.”
And when she goes, it settles in my bones.
No more restlessness. No more searching. No more hoping.
I’m good here.