Chapter Twenty-Nine
Dela
Being back in my cubicle was a surreal experience. There I was, sitting in my mediocre office chair with its squeaky frame and wheels that barely rolled, tapping at my dirty keyboard with the “S” key that barely worked, trying to pretend the world around me was normal.
As if I hadn’t been gone all weekend, in a different realm, surrounded by fire-breathing dragons and fighting off an insane attraction between one of them and myself.
How was it that all these people could just act like none of that even existed?
I had seen it with my very eyes. Hell, I’d ridden on the back of one!
And almost ended up being ridden by one, I thought morosely, recalling how things had ended so abruptly with Ember the night before.
To make sure I got the point that things between us could not be and that he had other, more important things to do, he’d had Pyre drive me home that morning. That stung—the clear dismissal.
I knew he was struggling with everything, but that hurt.
Now I was forced to sit there, staring at a screen, moving numbers around, and pretending like it all made sense.
Which it didn’t. None of it did. I was bored.
Was this really the life for me? Not that I belonged in the dragon realm, of course, but it had given me a taste of something new.
Something different. There was a whole world of possibilities out there for me, and I couldn’t help but wonder if I should look for one.
Maybe that would end up leading me to the one. Someone like Ember. Strong, protective, driven, commanding, sexy, caring, and more. That was the type of man I wanted. Someone like him.
Or is it him that you want, and you just can’t bring yourself to admit it?
“Miss Brooks?”
I looked to see a young man in a bike messenger outfit standing at the entrance to my dreary cubicle. The splashes of yellow and red on his tight outfit were a stark contrast to the endless field of gray.
“Yes?” I looked around, seeing several of my coworkers peering over the walls, curious about what was happening. “Can I help you?”
“Sign here, please.” He extended a metal clipboard that had a piece of paper attached to it and a pen.
“What am I signing for?” I asked, frowning at the piece of paper.
“To say you got delivery.” The man sounded bored. He probably got that reaction a lot.
“Uh, okay,” I said, scribbling my signature on the carbon paper. “Delivery of what?”
The man tore off the top piece of paper, keeping the other two copies for himself. He folded it and stuffed it into something out of sight on the floor. Then he picked something up that I couldn’t see and handed it to me.
“What the hell?” I managed before being completely overwhelmed by the giant bouquet of flowers. “This is ridiculous.”
The driver cleared his throat. Carefully, I leaned to one side with my head while shifting the bouquet to the other. He was holding a second bouquet, equally as large but with different flowers.
I raised my eyebrows. The delivery man nodded, confirming those were mine as well.
“Uh, thank you,” I said, setting the first bouquet down before fetching the second, trying to find room in my cubicle for both of them.
“Yep,” he grunted and left.
“That’s so lovely!” cooed Jennifer from her cubicle across the walkway from mine. “So many! Who are they from?”
“I quite literally have no idea,” I mumbled, still in shock. There was no way Ember could have sent them. Was there? He didn’t seem like the type to apologize for doing what he thought was right.
“Is there a note?” Jennifer asked eagerly. “See if there’s a note. You must have some idea. Aren’t you seeing someone?”
“Not anymore,” I mumbled. “That ended.”
“Well, maybe it’s from him, then? Trying to patch things up.”
I snorted. “I doubted that. He dumped me for the woman he’d been seeing for several weeks beforehand.”
Jennifer winced, her entire face scrunching up. “Ouch. I’m sorry, Dela. That’s terrible. Nobody deserves that.”
“Thanks,” I said, gently pawing through the assortment of tulips, lilies, and carnations. The mixture of reds and oranges and yellows was really quite beautiful. “No card in this one.”
Jennifer waited silently while I went through the second one, full of purples and pinks and white blooms. It, too, was beautiful but also wildly different.
Tucked in among them was a piece of thick white card, folded in half.
I snatched it up and opened it. The note was hand-written, though it was far too neat to be from a man.
“What does it say?” Jennifer asked eagerly.
“Dear Dela,” I said, reading it out loud. “I did not want things to end the way they did. I wish it could have been different.”
“That’s it?”
I nodded. That was it. Nothing more, no signature or words of hope for the future.
Just a statement that he wanted something more.
Which I already knew. I sighed. So much for the gigantic romantic gesture that I’d hoped for.
A promise he would always remember me and that he wished he could stay here on Earth and be the man for me.
“Men are so weird,” Jennifer said. “All those flowers, just to say that little? I don’t get it.”
I half-smiled. “I know,” I said distractedly.
I got it. They were Ember’s last words before he and his loyalists returned to the Rift. To the Fire Realm, where they would go up against Albright. Where he might die.
Blinking back sudden tears at the thought that last night might have been Ember’s final night alive, let alone with me, I turned away from Jennifer before she could see me. I could probably explain the tears away as happy tears at the flowers, but it would be easier not to have to say anything.
“I need some lunch,” I said, clearing my throat. It was only eleven-thirty, but we made our own hours. I could go when needed as long as I worked my set hours in a day. Without saying anything else, I signed out of my system and headed downstairs. Just like it was any other day.
I exited the ground floor of the skyscraper and headed across the street and a block over to the sandwich shop on the corner owned by Mr. and Mrs. Kim, the lovely Korean couple who made the absolute best meatball sub I’d ever had.
It was spicy and flavorful and entirely different from anything that was typical North American. Just like it was any other day.
They smiled and waved at me, and I returned it, confirming that I wanted “the usual” before taking my seat while they made it for me. I accepted a hot coffee as well and dug in, savoring the kick that came. Just like it was any other day.
“How am I supposed to go back to normal?” I whispered into my cup. Nothing was the same anymore. Everything was different. Dragons! I’d flown on one. Seen him breathe fire. I’d seen Ember kill someone. Of course, he wasn’t human, so I guess the laws didn’t apply, but it was still unnerving.
I leaned against the window, staring up into the sky. Far above, a bird wheeled around, looking just like a miniature dragon. If it was dark red, I could almost imagine it being Ember.
Briefly, I considered the idea of going out to his clan’s estates after work. Perhaps he was still there, and I could talk to him. Thank him for the flowers, if nothing else.
And then what? What are you going to do after that? Turn around and come home? It wasn’t anything but lust. He has to secure his throne, and he can’t do that with you around. You’re an impediment to him. An obstacle. If you truly care, you’ll stay out of his way and not become a distraction.
I sighed. It was true. I was little more than a—
“WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?”
Jerking upright at the absolute screech of a question, I came face to face with Chelsea.
Her half-Asian heritage was showing through as it always did when she was upset.
Her eyes narrowed to tiny slits, and her skin, normally quite pale, had taken on a very vibrant redness.
Sharp cheekbones pulled the skin back, and when she clenched her jaw, like now, they truly stood out in contrast.
“Hi, Chelsea,” I said, awkwardly waving as she came toward me with forceful stomps. “How are y—”
“Better, now that I know my best friend is alive,” she snapped. “And fricking pissed that she didn’t have the courtesy to tell me! Where the fuck did you go, Del? I’ve been looking for you!”
I grimaced. “I’m sorry, Chels,” I said, hugging her, careful not to mess up her bun or wrinkle her clothing too much. The black pantsuit looked expensive and was still perfectly pressed halfway through the day.
“Sorry isn’t good enough. Not this time,” she said icily. “I went to your house, Del. You weren’t home. You didn’t answer your phone. No calls, no texts. No nothing. You didn’t even have it turned on.”
Truthfully, the trip through the Rift had zapped the battery. It was at a mobile repair shop now, and I hoped to pick it up after work. That, however, was the least of my worries, I realized as panic set in. What I really should have considered was what lie I would tell Chels about where I’d been.
“I, uh, I needed some time,” I stammered, making it up as I went along. “To myself. To process things, you know?”
Chelsea shook her head. “Please tell me you didn’t get back with Paulo later that night. Not after you caught him cheating on you?”
“What? Absolutely not! Why would you think that?”
“Because,” Chelsea said, starting to calm now that it was clear I was okay and mostly “okay” in the head. “When I got to your house, he was also there. Said he was trying to make things up. That he wanted you after all.”
I laughed. “He probably got turned down by his side-piece and, as he said, wanted to ‘smash.’ Not that I would have said yes. I’m done with Paolo, that’s for sure. I am upping my standards!”
Chelsea frowned, taking a small step back to take in my face. “That’s an odd way to say it,” she said at last. “Very emphatic, knowing you. Very definitive, too. What is it you aren’t telling me, Del?”
“Ummmm.” Shit.
“You’re a terrible liar,” she said, shaking her head. “Where were you really this weekend?”
“It’s … complicated,” I moaned, sinking back into my seat. “There’s a lot I can’t tell you, even if I wanted to. But, um, I don’t know. I met someone.”
Chelsea moaned. “Again? Dela, I thought you were going to focus on yourself!”
I shook my head. “It’s not like that.”
“Uh-huh.”
“It’s not.” I grew sour internally. It couldn’t be like that, even though I wanted it to be.
“My darling Dela, my BFF eight times over,” Chelsea said tenderly. “It’s always like that with you. You meet someone. You fall in love with them right away.”
“I never said it was love!” I protested.
“It’s in your voice,” Chelsea said. “Gives you away.”
“It does?” I frowned. I wasn’t in love with Ember.
Was I? Things had been too quick for that, hadn’t they? He was an interesting person, but it was over. That’s what his note in the flowers had meant. It was a goodbye. There was no way I was in love with someone like that.
“If you like him so much,” Chelsea said, “Where does he live?”
“Northwest of town. A country place,” I said.
“Where you likely spent your weekend,” Chelsea said, not waiting for me to confirm. “What’s he do for work?”
“He’s a leader of a company, trying for CEO, which is an open position right now,” I said, surprised at my ability to manipulate the truth even for Chelsea. “There’s stiff competition, but he seems to be in the lead.”
Chelsea regarded me, then finally sat down herself. “What about his family?”
“Um.” How the hell did I explain that one?’
“Right. Where did he go to school?”
I stayed quiet.
“What are his hopes and dreams? Does he want kids?”
“Kids?” I said, strangled.
“See,” Chelsea said, shaking her head. “Dela, you don’t know him nearly well enough to be in love. I know you want kids. You’ve always talked about that. But what does he want?”
A wave of sadness crashed over me. She was right, of course. I didn’t know Ember, not like that. In fact, there was very little I did know. But we hadn’t been given a chance!
It was all so very confusing. Why had I even told Chelsea that I’d “met” someone when I knew the relationship between Ember and me was over?
If it had ever even existed at all. How caught up in it had I become?
I’d spent only two days with him, even if it felt like so much more.
I had to remember that somehow. It was hard because everything had happened so fast between us.
I was only now beginning to sort out fact from fiction. Coming back down to reality.
“I’m not telling you to avoid him,” Chelsea said, taking pity on my fumbling mood. “Just, you know, take your time. Like you said you would. Dela-time, that’s all.”
“Maybe,” I said before telling her all about the flowers he’d sent to my office that morning.
When I was done, Chelsea was staring at me again, but with a new look in her eyes.
“What?” I asked.
She shook her head. “I’ve never seen you like this, Dela.”
“What do you mean?”
“Just that you’re practically glowing when you talk about him.”
I shrugged. “He’s different, Chels. I don’t know if I can make it work between us. There are … issues.”
“When do you see him next?” she asked.
“As I said, issues.” I grimaced unhappily at her question, not wanting to go into further detail.
After all, what good would it do to tell her that I might never see Ember again? Ever.