Chapter Twenty-Nine #2
“No, I had to put Elsa down this morning.” The words come out watery and Caleb pulls me into a hug. “I’m so sorry. I remember when your dad bought her for you. What are you doing here?”
“I just need to keep my mind off it all. The gym is the only place I can take my mind off things.”
“All right then. Throw on some gloves and let’s spar. Let’s take your mind off shit.”
“Okay.”
After about twenty minutes of sparring, we both stop for a water break. “I didn’t realize how badly I’m out of shape.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. You just had a baby. You’ll get there. You have months to train and you have Marco to help you.” I feel myself flinch at Marco’s name and hope Caleb didn’t see it. I know he did, though, when he comes and sits in front of me.
“What happened?” I go into the entire story about Logan, Marco leaving, the photos and texts.
“I just can’t trust him. I know he was hurting, but…”
“No, fuck that. Don’t make excuses for him. Many years ago, I walked away from Hayley because I was too scared to talk to her. It was the day she and Marco were kidnapped. Now it’s not the same as what you and Marco are going through, but if I hadn’t walked away, they wouldn’t have been taken.”
I gasp, my hands covering my mouth. I was little when they were taken.
I don’t know all the specifics other than Marco was selling drugs and his biological mom was spending the money.
They got in over their heads and Caleb saved them.
Marco’s mom had overdosed and died and the men were charged with a bunch of stuff.
They kidnapped Hayley and Marco in an effort to get Caleb to drop the charges.
My dad, Bentley, Kaden, and Caleb got there just in time with the police and they were arrested. But I didn’t know he left them that day.
“You couldn’t have known.”
“No, I couldn’t have, but it doesn’t matter. We all make choices that affect those around us. Marco shouldn’t have left without telling you. He’s a twenty-six-year-old man. He’s had to grow up too fast in some ways, but in other ways, he still hasn’t grown up.”
“I’m afraid if I forgive him, I’ll look like a fool. Especially if he does it again.” I’m shocked to admit it out loud, but I feel relief to have said it.
“Love isn’t easy, Bella. All you can do is listen to your heart.
Every one of us have fucked up and anybody who cares about you isn’t going to judge you, but that doesn’t mean you should run back to him with open arms. Make him earn that.
Because if you let him get away with it, he will continue to do it. ”
“Thank you, Caleb.”
I head to the office to talk to my dad, and as I’m walking over, my mom comes walking in with Micaela, Lilly, and Nathan. “Mom!” I run over to her, pulling her into a hug, Micaela becoming the crème in our Oreo. “She’s gone, Mom.”
“Who’s gone?” My dad comes out of his office and asks.
“Elsa. They put her down.”
“I’m so sorry, sweetie. I brought her to Dr. Rowes this morning when she wouldn’t walk on her own. I wanted to call you, but you were already dealing with so much.”
“It’s okay. I got to say goodbye. I loved her so much.” Then I turn to Nathan and Lilly. “How are you guys doing?”
Lilly shrugs. “We said goodbye to her this morning. I’m sad to see her gone, but she wasn’t doing well.”
“I’m sorry you lost your dog, Bella,” Nathan adds. “I mean, she was all of ours, but even when you were away at college, she slept in your room.”
“Thanks, Nate.” I give him a hug.
We all go into dad’s office and spend the next hour talking about Elsa and our memories of her. I will miss her so much.
Eventually Mom says she needs to head to the rec center and Lilly and Nathan head out with her. After I feed Micaela, my dad and I go over a schedule, and he sends me some videos of Shawna Fields’ previous fights to look over at home, and when I can’t avoid my house any longer, I go home.
I walk inside to find the table set similar to the way it was the other night. There’s a different array of food this time and the table is where it belongs instead of in the living room, but it has the candles in the center.
“I figured with you training, you would want to eat healthy so I made dinner.”
“Hmm…this feels a lot like déjà vu. Oh wait, this did happen. The dinner. The candles. And I don’t really like how that all ended. What, with you leaving and all. So, I think I’ll just pass on dinner. I’ve had a long, shitty day, and I can’t deal with you right now.”
I go to walk away but Marco stops me in my tracks. “Please just eat,” he pleads, and of course at the moment, my stomach growls. “What have you eaten all day?”
“I was busy putting my dog down, thank you very much. Then I went to the gym to work out.”
“You had to put Elsa down? Why didn’t you call me?”
“Marco! Seriously? Why would I call you? You have made it a habit of breaking my heart, not piecing it together, so I’m pretty sure the last person I would call when I need to be comforted is you.”
Marco’s head hangs, but I don’t have the energy to feel bad. “Okay, I get that. I hate that you can’t come to me or count on me to be there for you. But you can at least let me feed you.”
“I’m not hungry,” I say stubbornly.
“Belles, you’re breastfeeding and training. You need to work out a food plan. You need high proteins plus you need to eat several small meals to make sure you and Micaela are getting the nutrients you both need.” I know he’s right. I didn’t even think about any of that.
“How about we eat dinner and then we can go over a meal plan?” I want to say no, but he’s trying.
“Fine. But only because it will help keep my mind off Elsa and I need a meal plan.”
After dinner, we go over a meal plan and Marco says he’ll pick up the food tomorrow so we can put them together for the week.
After I get out of the shower, he knocks on my half-open bedroom door. “Can I come in?”
“I guess.”
Sitting on the bed next to me, he holds out a box. “I bought this for you for Valentine’s Day. You know, before I messed everything up.”
Taking it from his hands, I open the teal blue box and inside is beautiful silver charm bracelet with a heart dangling from it, and written on the heart says Mom.
“It’s a locket,” Marco says.
I open it up and nestled inside is a tiny picture of Micaela. “It’s beautiful. Thank you.” I take it out of the box and hand it to Marco to put on me.
“I know Valentine’s Day is supposed to be romantic, but it’s also about love. No matter what happens between us you will always be the mother of my child and you are a damn good mom, Bella.”
He leans over and gives me a soft kiss on my cheek before standing up. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Marco.”
The next several days we fall into a routine.
I leave to work out for a few hours, my mom watches Micaela, and Marco has dinner waiting when I get home.
He always makes sure my meals for the day are packed and he never asks to take Micaela.
The food he makes is always healthy and delicious and we always eat in silence.
Finally, after a week or so, I decide to ask Marco something that’s been on my mind while we’re eating dinner.
“Why aren’t you at the gym working out?” He looks shocked at my question, which I don’t understand.
He’s been fighting his entire life. Sure, I appreciate that he’s doing some laundry while I’m gone and having dinner ready, but what I don’t get is why he isn’t working out.
I know he’s been attending more meetings, but those are only like an hour long.
“I can’t,” he mumbles. I didn’t even think about the fact that he hasn’t been cleared yet.
“When do you go to the doctor?” He just shrugs and continues to eat.
Several more days pass and our routine continues. Then one day, my dad says, “So I take it Marco found another gym to train at.”
“What do you mean?” I huff out, hitting the mat flat on my back as my dad throws me into an arm bar for the takedown.
I smack the ground in frustration, tapping out.
Every time my dad sweeps my legs, bringing me to the ground, I get even more pissed.
Standing up fighting, I got that shit all day, but the minute I hit the ground I’m fucked.
I used to be so good at ground fighting, but as I got older, I focused more on stand-up fighting and less on grappling. Now it’s become my weakness.
My dad reaches his arm out and I take it, letting him help me up. “Well, he must to be training somewhere. The fight is coming up and he’s got to be freaking out.”
“My fight?”
“Well, honey, I mean, yes, it’s your fight, but Marco is getting paid six figures to defend his belt on top of what he gets paid in his contract.”
“What?” I say louder than I mean to. “Marco isn’t fighting. He’s not even allowed to.”
“Unless I misunderstood Daniel, Marco is fighting and he’s the main event.
It will be announced in a few days. Daniel called to see how Marco is doing, but I told him he’s not training here.
Marco’s got a lot at stake here. If he wins, his bonus is huge, so he has to be training somewhere.
” He pulls out his phone and shows me the text.
Daniel: Marco is cleared. You training him?
The conversation continues, and everything my dad said is true.
Marco is fighting the same night as me as the main event.
I am stumped by this. Every day I’ve left to train, Marco has acted like he’s been home or at a meeting.
Is it possible he’s leaving to go train somewhere else?
He’s been giving me space since the whole California thing happened.
He doesn’t go to my parents with me, and he hasn’t stepped foot in this gym since we returned, but would he really lie to me about not being able to train?
And why? Why hide the fight? It’s not like I’m not going to see him at the MGM Grand on fight night.