30. Regretfully Yours
REGRETFULLY YOURS
FOX
“She believes you.”
Dina’s voice comes through the door behind us.
Lucy groans.
“She was listening the whole time,” Lucy mutters.
“Almost certainly,” I agree.
“She’s the worst.”
“She’s the best.”
Lucy takes my hand, just takes it, like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
She believes me.
I know it before she says it. In the silence after my explanation. In the way the tension leaves her shoulders.
Like a fist slowly opening.
“I believe you,” she says quietly, giving me the words I need.
I pull her into my arms.
We stand in the diner kitchen while the morning light moves across the floor.
For most of my life, I kept the inside of me carefully managed—feelings on a short leash, distance mistaken for safety.
That performance was very good.
But it wasn’t honest.
“I was scared,” I tell her.
“You?”
“Yes.”
She smiles. “You’re safe with me.”
I kiss the top of her head.
“I know.”
Later—much later—I’ll think about this moment.
About the waiting room.
About four days in terrible chairs, learning the difference between loud love and quiet love.
I’m still the same man.
I’m not suddenly noble because I almost lost my wife.
I’m still ruthless when I want something badly enough.
I closed doors in Nashville for a man who hurt someone I cared about.
I lied to Lucy for weeks while she recovered because I thought the outcome mattered more than the method.
I’m morally flexible. I always have been.
The difference now is what I want.
For most of my life, I wanted control.
Now I want her.
Lucy Vidal Bennett.
With her diner shifts and her garden dirt and the way she cooks cassoulet like it’s a declaration of love.
I want mornings with her.
Kitchens with her.
I want to spend the rest of my life asking what she wants and listening to the answer.
And I will use every tool at my disposal to keep her.
Lucy squeezes my hand. “I love you, Fox.”
My chest expands like it’s opening after a long winter.