Chapter 24
EDEN
“ I thought I’d find you out here.”
I turn to see Mika derobing as she approaches the pool. She’s wearing a pretty light blue bikini that shows off her thin figure—and so many scars. Small little dots that I’ve learned mean she grew up near the valley. She was probably lower class at one point, near the dangerous lower elevations.
I have the scars, too. They’re all faded, but there—though mine aren’t as plentiful as hers.
“There’s breakfast on the table.” I’m not sure who alerted the chef that I was out here, but Ash brought out a tray of fruits and pastries for me just minutes ago. Unfortunately, she had to go to the training grounds, but she was able to tell me that Lochlan is supposedly fine.
The gossip in this place moves fast.
She waves her hand. “I already ate. I came to see how you were doing.” Her teeth sink into her lip, and her gaze darts toward the door. “Have you seen him?”
I shake my head, the curls I piled up into a bun bouncing with the movement. “Kieran wanted me to wait. Have you?”
“No. Gale came by the house to let me know. She didn’t want me to hear and freak out about Jude.”
My brows pinch. “Was he hurt?”
“He drove Lochlan down there this morning. He didn’t get hit, though.” She props her arm on the edge of the pool wall. “I can’t believe someone shot him.”
Something tugs in my chest. I’ve grown to really care about Lochlan and Rohan. All of Kieran’s little family. And Lochlan, more than any of the other guys, is so playful. Funny. I know not to underestimate him—that dangerous edge is still obviously there—but for him to have been targeted…
It makes me a little murderous.
“Kieran said it wasn’t serious.” He was almost too calm about it. “Do they get shot often?”
Her lips quirk. “I wouldn’t say often. But between fighting in the cages, training with each other, and the occasional rebel lashing out, they are no strangers to pain.”
That doesn’t surprise me in the slightest.
But my mind snags on one thing she mentioned—the rebels.
Since Kieran found me, we never talked about them.
It’s one thing I haven’t pushed, but I know so little about what happened that day.
I’ve worked to repair the relationships I once had, to understand things about myself I’d forgotten, but that attack is something no one has brought up. Myself included.
“Mika…” Her light brown eyes turn to me, and I steel myself. For someone that hates being vulnerable in any capacity, I’ve been flaying myself open lately. “Those rebels. Are they trying to take charge of the city?”
Her expression quickly turns hard. “They’re citizens unwilling to actually work for a better life, so they interfere with everyone else’s.”
There’s something bitter in her tone that makes it feel more personal. “What do you mean?”
She sighs, turning toward me. “The city has a class system, one that directly ties to where you can live. Instead of working within their classes—or living in the housing they are given as a result—they default from their jobs, live in a moving camp in the woods, and accuse the Elites of purposefully poisoning everyone else.”
“So they’re mad about the toxic air.”
Parker made that much clear when I was in the camp. Not Damian, though. He was quiet, withdrawn. When he did mention the Elites, it was clear there was more history there than Parker’s grievances and a life in the valley.
She flicks a strand of hair out of her face.
“Among other things. I think it’s about control.
Power. Like most things. They claim to hate the mafia but launch attacks that hurt innocent people while getting pissed at Kieran for doing the same.
” She blows out a breath. “I’ll be honest, I have no problem killing someone.
None of us do. We protect each other. But it pisses me off that they are no better and act as if they are. ”
I digest that. I won’t pretend I have any moral code.
I’ve understood that for a while now. I like bloodshed, have no qualms about killing someone, and don’t give a fuck if other people think it’s unfair that Kieran lives up in this mountain.
Maybe that’s why I never found any empathy around the rebels—because I didn’t agree with a word out of their mouths.
Maybe there are people in the city that care about fairness.
That think Kieran should act differently.
But I’m not one of them. That became glaringly obvious at the cages when I wanted to fight my way onto the mat, when I got turned on at the thought of watching Kieran kill, when we fucked hard that night after he painted such an illicit image in my mind.
Maybe I’m fucked up. But this whole city is, and I don’t want it any other way.
“Is that why they came after me?” I’m certain that Mika will know what happened that day.
When she’s silent for too long, I look over to see her eyes assessing me.
“We don’t know why they did. We assume it was to distract Kieran, that their ultimate goal is getting rid of the Elite.
But Kieran didn’t exactly negotiate to get you back, and Lochlan didn’t ask questions before he killed everyone he got his hands on. ”
That almost makes me laugh. “Do you know what happened? I obviously know I woke up there, but I don’t know how I ended up there.”
“Do you think maybe you and Kieran should have this conversation?”
I shake my head. “I don’t want him to be reminded.” Looking back on the day he found me, he was devastated. I can’t ask him to recount what happened to cause him to lose his wife.
That makes Mika’s gaze soften with understanding.
“He probably wouldn’t talk about it,” she whispers.
Sighing, she continues, “Jude was with you that day.
There had been increasing rebel attacks, to the point that even Rohan and Lochlan were getting stressed about it.
When a guard told Jude that they had captured a rebel, you insisted you go interrogate him, wanting to help Kieran stop the constant problems.
“Jude agreed to take you, and you were ambushed in the interrogation rooms. He lost sight of you, and by the time they got reinforcements, you were gone.”
Her words feel familiar. They tug at a memory, but then pain lances up the back of my head. I clutch the spot, and Mika’s eyes track the movement.
“Kieran thought they were going to kill you,” she admits.
“He barely held it together. He had guards combing the woods every day until movement was reported. Then, he led everyone out there to get you back.” She frowns, her voice softening a little.
“But none of us know how they took your memories or why.”
It feels like there are gaps there we haven’t filled in.
I understand targeting me as Kieran’s wife, but taking my memories doesn’t seem in line with anything I’ve heard about the rebels.
Nolan told me he didn’t see any signs of trauma to my brain that would have caused it, so it seems like it was intentional.
“They told me I was one of them.” I hadn’t told anyone that yet. At first, I didn’t trust Nolan or Kieran enough to, and as I got closer to everyone, we started to leave the past alone. “That I had lived in the camp, that I had friends there.”
Mika’s eyes close as she exhales. “Which is why you didn’t trust what we said.”
“I was being told two completely opposite stories, and I had no memories to rely on.”
She loops her arm through mine, tugging me into her. “And yet, I was the one that won you over.”
I giggle at that. “Yes, you were.” She gives me a grin, but it’s a little strained. Like she’s holding something back. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m only telling you this because I know you’d want to know.
” She glances back at the house before continuing.
“You and Jude used to spend every day together. He was the only one who knew about you and Kieran for months. And he was the one who lost you.” Pain laces her tone.
“It’s killed him ever since. He feels so guilty, and I don’t think he’s forgiven himself. I’m not sure he ever will.”
My chest aches at that. Jude has rarely interacted with me, and I thought that maybe he was just like Rohan and reserved. But now, the way he’s looked at me—especially those first few days—makes so much sense.
“I’d never blame him.”
“I know.” I spot someone coming down the hall through the glass doors. “But he blames himself, and I thought you should know.”
Mika flashes me another smile as the doors open, pulling away.
I see the sorrow she’s trying to hide, and I realize that it’s because of the sadness her husband has been feeling.
I’ve worked to rebuild my relationships with Lochlan and Rohan, have been trying to reclaim the pieces of who I was.
But there have been moments that make more sense now—because I’m still missing a member of my family.
“Am I interrupting?” Kieran drawls, though his lips curl at the edges. He’s teasing, and I find that expression so sexy.
“I was just leaving.” Mika picks up her robe, pausing to pat Kieran’s shoulder. “I won’t make you compete with me for her attention. You’d lose.”
He narrows his eyes at her, and I giggle. That only has his green gaze flicking to me. “Is that true?”
I fight a smile. “We both know you don’t want to hear the answer to that.”
Mika’s laugh echoes behind her as she stalks off, but Kieran’s gaze never leaves me.
He toes his boots off once she’s disappeared from view. “You’re going to pay for that one.” He strips his shirt off. “Do I need to remind you why I’m better than Mika’s company?”
I openly stare as he pushes at his waistband, stepping out of his pants and underwear.
Kieran is far too gorgeous, the sun gleaming off his fair skin and highlighting the divots of his muscles.
Scars litter his body, but I think they only heighten his appeal.
Just like those disheveled brown waves and the short scruff along his jaw.
His chuckle draws my attention back to his face as he stalks toward the pool. “That’s what I thought.”
Rolling my eyes, I turn away from him, refusing to even acknowledge his cockiness. I hear him moving through the water behind me, and his arms wrap around my waist, dragging me back against his body.
“How was Lochlan?” I ask as he brushes a kiss along my temple.
“Raging.” His palm splays across my stomach, pressing me more firmly into him. “The wound wasn’t bad. He’ll heal up fine—as long as we keep him from sneaking off to find the bastard who shot him.”
“But you will?”
“Jude’s already working on it.” His thumb swipes along my skin, and I sink into him. “Mika’s good?”
“Yeah. Gale already told her.” I don’t admit what we were talking about. I meant it when I said I didn’t want to hurt Kieran by making him relive that.
“She’s probably going to Lochlan’s now. That should help lift his spirits.”
“I still want to see him.”
“We will. I told him we’d come over for dinner later.” Kieran spins me around to face him. “I thought we could finish that conversation from this morning.”
His hands slide down to grip the back of my thighs, and I wrap my legs around his waist as he lifts me, hands clasping at the back of his neck. “I thought you’d avoid that.”
He shrugs. “Most of our important conversations have happened in this pool. I guess it has me in an agreeable mood. Better take advantage.”
A grin teases my lips as I play with the short hair at his nape. “It is rare you aren’t just glaring and drinking.” His hands squeeze my ass as he narrows his eyes, and I tip my head back with a laugh. “Okay. Do you have any other family?”
“Just the ones you’ve met.”
“Do you like being in the mafia?”
His grin is vicious. “I get to kill whoever I want, and no one can tell me what to do. What’s not to like?”
I suspected as much, but I like Kieran’s dark side too much not to ask. “I’m pretty sure Rohan tells you what to do all the time.”
His grip tightens. “You are asking for trouble today, Eden. Stop testing me before I run out of patience for your questions and use your pretty mouth for other things.”
I’m tempted. For the most part, I understand who Kieran is. I might not know everything about him, but who he is? That is perfectly clear to me, and I really like it. His loyalty. His violence. His dry humor.
Between the questions he answered this morning and talking to Mika, I know that Kieran’s life has been brutal. But it’s shaped him into this person that I think I might love.
“I have one last question.”
He raises a brow. “Which is?”
“What was my life like before we met?” He said he had no other family, which means I must not.
“You were a cage fighter.” I scrape my nails up his scalp, encouraging him to give me more.
“You grew up in the lower part of the city, took illegal contracts for a while, and eventually got into the cages.” He backs us against the pool wall, leaning down until our noses brush.
“Always so bloodthirsty, my pretty wife.”
I bite my lip. “So I have no family?”
His green eyes soften. It’s barely noticeable, but that’s how Kieran is. He does care. It’s just subtle. “You were orphaned when you were still young.”
I nod. The words don’t really bother me. “And now I have you.”
“You have me,” he whispers. “I have one question for you, mo chuisle .”
It’s the first time he’s said that outside of sex, which makes my pulse pick up. It must be important. “Which is?”
“Why haven’t you moved back into our room?”
I hadn’t really thought about it. He put me in that guest room, and a part of me expected him to move everything back when he was ready. I didn’t think he was waiting for me.
Tilting my head, I give him a teasing smile. “Are you asking me to move in with you, Kieran?”
His dark gaze drops down to my mouth. “Do I need to force a yes out of you, wife? I have no problem playing dirty to get what I want.”
I chuckle. “Maybe.” My tone softens. “You want me back in your room? Every night?”
“Of course I do. I never wanted you anywhere else. I was just trying to give you space to adjust—which I hated—but I love—” He blinks, composing himself. “Having you in my bed. I don’t want you anywhere else but with me.”
I don’t want anything else, either. But I prefer making Kieran work for it. He doesn’t like me to make it too easy on him after all.
Rolling my hips into him, I answer, “I could be convinced.”
His expression quickly shifts, hungry and dangerous. He’s about to edge me until I’m pleading, but that’s what I want. And in the end, I’ll say yes. I just want him to drag the words out of me.
Just like I know that there are certain ones I’ll have to drag out of him eventually. As difficult as words are for Kieran, as twisted as he might be, I know that he loves me. But I also know he won’t open himself up to say it when things are still so uncertain between us.
Even if I think I might love him, too.