Lennon
The funny thing about hospitals was that they may just be where I felt most safe.
This was the one place where no one took advantage of me.
It was the spot where I controlled the narrative.
If I ended up here on a form, it was because of my own actions. Consequences I could trace back to myself. No one touched me inappropriately here. No one took what wasn’t theirs. Natural consequences were initiated by my actions, whether I liked to admit that or not.
So, as I watched Asher, hooked up to breathing tubes and IVs, my heart sank. I was on the helpless end of things once again.
There was nothing I could do to change this situation. No action that I had done had landed me here. This was sheer pain watching him incapacitated.
It had been eleven days.
Eleven days since he had been out.
Eleven days since my world narrowed to these hospital walls.
Every passing second scraped something raw inside me. I didn’t need answers or clarity. No. I just needed to know that he was okay.
That was all that mattered at this point.
I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply. I pictured Asher’s smile. His recklessly bright smile lighting up my days. The way he knelt down to pet Nova, speaking ever so softly to her. The way he wrapped me up in his arms and carried me to bed.
Please be okay.
His rigid jawline was always such an oxymoron for someone that was so unbearably soft of a person. The safe one.
The safe place for me to hide. A home for me to run toward.
My home.
“What ails you, my beautiful siren?” Asher rasped.
Shock tore through me so violently at the sound of his voice. I shot to my feet and scrambled onto the edge of his bed, wrapping myself in him like he might disappear.
“Asher—Asher, oh my fucking God, you’re here!” I cried.
He gave me a weak chuckle. “So are you, angel. So are you.”
“Well, duh. We still had some stupid bucket list items to finish,” I said, half laughing, half falling apart. “And you were about to exit stage right on me.”
Asher appeared in pain as he closed his eyes and tried to sit up, his elbows weak as they attempted to hoist him upright. I gripped his waist, steadying him, helping shift him into a seated position.
Our eyes locked and butterflies filled my stomach. What the hell was that?
“I wasn’t going to kick the bucket without finishing up with you. I just needed a way to get you back to me, was all,” he said with a laugh.
“Yeah, yeah. Real funny, coma boy,” I replied sarcastically.
“Better than you calling me rich boy. Almost sounds cooler, you know?”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re insufferable.”
“And yet, you’re still here with me.”
I lowered my gaze, vulnerability creeping in and taking over before I could stop it. “I thought I’d lost you, Asher.”
He felt the pang in my heart when I said it. I saw the twinge of sorrow flash across his face instantly.
“I thought I’d lost you, Lennon,” he said with such a sombre tone. “I woke up knowing that day was the day. And I think it sent me over the ledge. I can’t imagine a life without you.”
Tears pooled down my cheeks. I had missed the appointment. I hadn’t realized he knew.
“I got a call from your mother,” I began. “She told me you went into cardiac arrest. I ran to you as soon as I could.”
The thought hit him suddenly. “What day is it?”
“October 27th.”
Processing what that meant, his eyes grew wide.
“You’ve been here with me an extra eleven days?”
I shook my head. “You’ve been out for eleven days, Asher. That’s terrifying.”
A soft smile began to fill the features on his face, one I’ll never forget. “Yeah,” he murmured, “but not as terrifying as you being gone forever. You’ve been here eleven days longer than you wanted to be. And fuck…that makes me so proud of you.”
My heart melted straight into my stomach, dissolving into something soft and unrecognizable.
What the fuck was he doing to me?
He reached for my hand, bringing it to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to each knuckle.
“I love you, Lennon. I’d known it from the moment I met you. Right from the time I passed out chasing you down the hall, to the time you slapped me—one of the times, anyway—until this very moment and all that’s in between. I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life.”
I was sobbing uncontrollably now.
“I love you too, Asher. So fucking much. So much that you can’t leave me behind in this world.”
“The same goes for you, you know.”