Chapter 32
CHAPTER 32
When I wake up the next morning, my broken arm is aching like a bad cavity. But the pain can’t weigh me down. I’m in the greatest of moods. Noémie is into women. Noémie and I hooked up. Noémie doesn’t seem to care that I’m a touch-me-not. There is a chance that we can be together. And the cherry to top everything off is that Sarah flies back into Toronto tonight.
Noémie isn’t in the bed with me, which saddens me, but she’s always been an early riser and it’s almost eleven.
I get out of bed, stretching my good arm over my head, and reach for the painkillers. I take the recommended dose and go to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. Then, I pull on my discarded ball shorts and black hoodie. I love that it smells like her.
With a hop in my step, I hurry downstairs—my heart pounds in my ears. It’s stupid that I’m so excited to see Noémie, but I can’t help it. I can’t stop grinning like an idiot. I walk into the main room. Noémie isn’t there. Céline also isn’t curled up in her favourite spot on the couch. It’s likely Noémie took the dog out for a walk.
I go to the espresso machine to make myself a latte. Not the easiest thing to do with a cast. As I go through the motions, I recall the first time Noémie made me a drink on the La Marzocco machine. It had been perfection. Since that time, she’s made me several amazing coffee drinks. She spoils me so much. God, I love her.
Sipping on my drink, I take a seat at the kitchen island and open the email app on my phone. There’s an email from Francois, sending me suggestions for fonts for my graphic novel cover. We’re just about ready to launch the Kickstarter, and I’m super anxious about it. But it’s a good kind of anxiousness. Francois has been a godsend; he really makes me feel like my dreams are achievable. And now, thinking back on how upset I’d been about Noémie making the connection with him, I realize how foolish I’d been.
I finish my latte and start to get a little antsy. My leg bounces as I scroll through Instagram. The waiting is killing me. I want to see Noémie. I want to know when she’ll be back home. I decide to call her.
On the third ring, Noémie picks up. “What do you want, Jordan?” Her curtness throws me off. On her end of the line, it sounds like she’s somewhere busy, like a mall.
“Just woke up,” I say, crashing down on the living-room couch. “Where are you at?”
For several moments, she’s silent. Then, she replies, “I’m at Pearson—just about to board my flight.”
My heart shatters like glass, splintering into a million little pieces. My dumb ass should have expected this. I should have known things were too good to be true. Noémie doesn’t love me. Of course, she chose Felix over me. He’s handsome. He’s got money. He’s someone Hugo would approve of. Me, I’m a step above a barista. I have no money. I’m a woman. All I have to offer her is my heart.
My eyes sting. I clear my throat to loosen the ball that’s lodged there. “Cool, cool,” I say.
“Did you want something, Jordan?” She sounds irritated.
“Nah,” I say, trying my best to sound unfazed. At least, I hope she can’t hear me dying inside. “Have a safe flight.”
Tapping the large red button, I end the call. My phone slips from my finger and clatters on the floor. I don’t bother trying to pick it back up.
When Samira called things off, I thought I knew what heartbreak felt like. Now I know that breakup was only a ripple compared to this wave of emotion crashing over me. I drown in it. Or maybe it’s my tears that are choking me, making it hard to breathe.
The entire day, I don’t do anything. I call in sick on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. My excuse is the motorcycle accident. Those three days at home are spent wasting away in my dark room. Sarah calls me a million times—I let everything go to voicemail. I’m probably the worst best friend in the world, but I can’t friend right now.
On Thursday, I force myself to shower and get ready for work. With limited sick time available to me, if I don’t want my cheque to be impacted, I need to go into work.
Wayne knows something is off the moment he sees me. “You look like shit,” he says. “But I’m glad to see you’re in one piece after the accident. I was really worried.”
I don’t answer him as I open the coffee shop’s front door.
We go through the motions of setting up the store, and then we’re open. It’s busy, and we’re making mistakes, and my cast is making me slow. We’re in the weeds, and I’m blown.
I can’t do this.
Storming off the floor, I retreat to the back office. I yank off my apron and toss it on the floor. My head pounds. I start pacing back and forth.
“Jordan, what the actual f—” Spotting my tears, Wayne snaps his mouth shut. He gently closes the door and rushes over to me. “Oh my God, what’s wrong, honey?”
I shake my head and collapse into the desk chair, holding my head in my hands.
Wayne comes to my side and kneels. “Jordan, you’re starting to scare me,” he whispers, rubbing my back.
I don’t immediately answer him. I consider not telling him anything, but then I think that maybe the first step to getting over this is talking about it.
Meeting his eyes, I sniffle. “I’m in love with Noémie,” I say.
He doesn’t seem shocked by my disclosure. “Okay, so you’re in love with Noémie. Why is that a problem?”
My eyes narrow on him as I realize something. “You knew she’s into women.” I say it as a statement, not a question.
Standing, Wayne takes a step back and crosses his arms. “So what if I did?”
“And you didn’t think to tell me?”
“It’s not my place to out people,” Wayne says curtly.
“Since when?” I ask. “You’re, like, the biggest gossip I know.”
He pouts and ignores my question. “I’m still not understanding the need for these theatrics,” he says, gesturing at me with a flourish. “And we’ve got a line out the door, Jay. We’re swamped. You’re needed on the espresso machine.”
I sigh and rake my fingers through my hair. “I know. I just need a minute.”
“Why is loving Noémie so terrible?” he asks. “Last time I checked, she’s fucking gorgeous and you two are already living together, which saves you the cost of a U-Haul.”
I glare at him. “She’s with Felix in Hawaii.”
Wayne rolls his eyes dramatically. “Okay, so tell her how you feel when she gets back.” He doesn’t get it. How does he not get it?
I grit my teeth. “Noémie and I hooked up Saturday night, and on Sunday morning she left me to be with her boyfriend in Honolulu.”
“You did what? She did what?” Wayne’s mouth drops open.
I chuckle coldly. “It’s not that surprising. I should have expected it, but … I don’t know.” I shake my head and stare down at the floor.
“How about you call her? You can clear the air, tell her how you feel.”
I exhale a deep breath and rub my temples. “No, there’s no point.”
“How do you know that if you don’t at least try to talk to her?”
“She left me to be with Felix,” I snap at him.
“No, she didn’t,” Wayne states. He throws up his hands in defeat. “I can’t do this anymore. I told her to drop it, but does anyone listen to me? No.”
“What are you even talking about?”
“Noémie is gay. Felix is gay. He’s not her boyfriend. She’s like a sister to him,” Wayne says.
What? I frown. Wayne’s got it wrong. I shake my head and almost laugh at the absurdity of Wayne’s claim. Noémie and Felix are together. “They kissed at the Christmas market. I heard them hooking up,” I say.
“Whatever you heard, I can assure you they weren’t having sex.” He sounds so convinced of what he’s saying, I want to believe him. “I swear, Jordan, you can be so obtuse sometimes,” Wayne continues.
I glare at him. “What are you trying to say?”
Wayne glares back at me. “There’s a reason Noémie came to our shop every weekday morning, and it wasn’t because she loved our coffee. There’s a reason she jumped at the chance to work here even though she’s stupid rich. You know, when she graduated, she got access to a trust fund with more money than we can hope to make in a lifetime. She chooses to work,” he snaps. “Anyways, that girl has been simping for you since forever, and you refused to acknowledge or even see it.”
So, Noémie lied about being broke. Seems like she lied about a lot. It’s a good thing I didn’t say I love you back.
“If what you’re saying is true that doesn’t explain why she’s with Felix right now in Hawaii,” I say. “If what you’re saying is true, why didn’t you tell me?”
Wayne goes very still. He starts to fidget. “Before I tell you, I need you to promise you won’t hate me.”
The fuck? “I can’t make any promises,” I say, recalling all the whispered conversations between him and Noémie. I recall how they used to run off to the stockroom to have private discussions. I see red. “Spill it, Wayne. What have you and Noémie been keeping from me?”
“We sorta had a bet.”
“A bet?” I repeat.
Wayne rubs his eyes and sighs. “Yes, we had a bet. Noémie was so convinced that she could wife you up, and I told her you’d steamroll her cold heart,” he explains. “The deal was that if you guys slept together before you confessed to loving her, I’d get anything I wanted from her closet. And if she won, she’d get bragging rights…and I’d have to train for and run a marathon. Can you imagine me in a gym? Sheeshh—what a relief it is to hear that Noémie finally caved. Frankly, I’m surprised the girl held out so long. Anyhow, Felix is just a chess piece Noémie’s been using to make you jealous.”
Speechless, I stare at my friend.
Can I even call him a friend? How could he betray me like this? Knowing the truth is somehow worse than thinking Noémie chose Felix over me. Like, I always knew Noémie was a bitch, but…I thought I knew her. Now I’m realizing that I never really did. Everything between us was a lie.