Chapter 1 #2
Kayleigh and I share a glance, understanding just how unlikely this scene would have been ten months ago.
Clay was practically a recluse, grumpy and self-loathing, for nearly the entire decade since my accident when we also lost Mom.
That was until our older brother Tanner’s fiancée, Veronica, brought her best friend, Lizzy, into our lives earlier this year. But that’s a whole other story.
Watching them is almost enough to distract me from losing my job earlier today.
I was always supposed to be the sibling that had their shit together, even if I’m the free spirit.
While I may not have had a plan for my life, I always seemed to end up in the right place at the right time.
I was the first one in my family to graduate college.
I got my dream job here in Park City working for a non-profit I was passionate about.
Even being set back for nearly six months recovering from the car accident in my teens, I was exactly where I wanted to be up until a few hours ago.
I get up and head to the kitchen island. “Anybody need a refill? It’s Friday night after all.”
I pour myself a glass of red wine, leaning against the counter, watching them in the dining room. Seeing my brother with Lizzy, I’m beyond happy for them. Having someone in my corner like that would be great right now, even if I don’t need them, but here I am still very single.
I know what I want from my life. That will never change.
I want to see the world and keep traveling.
Aside from losing my job today, I still want to work with non-profits and make a difference.
And I can do that alone or with someone that will enjoy it with me.
If I did have someone with me, I’d want someone who’s comfortable in their own skin and knows what they want.
It shouldn’t be this hard to find a confident man that makes me feel valued, the way I value myself.
“You alright?” Kayleigh’s voice catches me off guard when she joins me in the kitchen. "I've never known you to be all doom and gloom when there’s pizza around.”
She's got me there. I love pizza. Pizza party at school or work? I know everyone thinks they’re cliché, but I have always thought they were fun.
Growing up in Jackson, Big Red’s pizza was a staple in our house on Friday nights.
I loved standing around, sharing food, and pouring soda out of the big bottles.
That’s why I always love it when we do pizza here on Friday nights.
I smile half-heartedly back at Kayleigh, taking a sip of my wine. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just a long day.”
She eyes me skeptically. “You sure?” She points to my wine glass. “That’s the second glass you’ve poured in the last ten minutes. Starting to worry there won't be any left for the rest of us.”
Clay is easy to hide my feelings from when he’s distracted by Lizzy, but I’m clearly not fooling Kayleigh tonight.
“Look, I don't want to make a big deal about this, especially with my family and the wedding next week. So can we keep this just between us?”
She grabs the bottle of wine to top off her glass and nods. “Your secret is safe with me. Promise.”
I let out a long sigh. “I got laid off today.”
She jerks her head back. “Are you serious? We were just volunteering with you this morning.”
I hold my finger to my lips in a shushing gesture. “Don’t let them hear you, but yeah.” I take a drink and shrug. "It is what it is.”
“Is there anything I can do?” She rests her hand on my shoulder. This is why Kayleigh and Clay have been best friends for years. It’s why the two of us became such good friends too. She will always ask how she can help those close to her.
“No, I’ll be fine. Just a bit of a shock, that’s all.” That’s an understatement. It’s still just settling in that come Monday morning, I won’t have to go into the office I’ve been going to for basically my entire adult life.
She reaches down, opening the wine fridge and emerges with another bottle.
“I feel like we might need this tonight.”
I let out a short laugh. “You don’t have to twist my arm.”
“Timing is good for you though.”
I arch a brow at her. “Is there ever a good time to get laid off?”
“Oh, come on. You just turned twenty-seven. You have some time off for the holidays anyway. Take your van up to Jackson early, before the wedding. Ski bum around for a bit. It’s not like you have anything or anyone tying you down here.
” She looks at her wine for a second before bringing her eyes back to mine.
Sure, I have the occasional hook up partner from time to time, but I haven’t found someone worth dating yet and she knows that. I don’t even feel like my standards are unreasonable. I shouldn’t have to apologize for being tall and quirky or worry about intimidating guys with a Napoleon complex.
I give her a light slap on the wrist that’s not holding her wine. “OK. Ouch. Way to throw salt in the wound. No need to remind me of my lack of a love life.”
“What’s your line again, ‘too many boys, not enough men'? Thankfully, I’m not interested in either.” She smirks at me playfully.
She’s throwing my trademark line of why I’ve never had a serious boyfriend right back in my face.
It might be self-inflicted, but if there's one thing I learned from my family growing up, it’s knowing your own worth and having standards.
Both of my brothers held out and landed their perfect matches.
“Really though. If I didn’t have my insane training schedule, I would do that in a heartbeat. Come on, let me live vicariously through you,” she says, her hands raised in a pleading gesture.
“That’s,” I pause for a second, “not the worst idea.”
This time, she quirks a brow at me. “Think about it. Try to make the best of the situation.”
“If you come visit me to do some backcountry skiing finally, I’ll do it.
” I say, glaring at her in challenge. I’ve always tried to get her to go backcountry skiing with me and she always turns me down.
This time, I see the sparkle in her eyes, the one that tells me I pushed the right button to stoke the competitive side of an Olympic skier.
“Deal,” she says, grinning wide before patting me on the shoulder again and heading back to the table.
I hear Clay burst out laughing from the dining table, dragging my attention away from the kitchen. I take a second to look around Kayleigh’s sprawling slopeside home before heading back to the dining room to join them.
Her place is massive compared to mine. Fortunately, that’s a positive right now. My place is easy to afford and maintain if I’m gone for a few weeks, or even a couple months.
Maybe Kayleigh’s right. Maybe I should just make the best of it. Maybe being jobless going into ski season isn’t so bad. I’ve been so caught up about losing my dream job that I haven’t thought of the upside.
The universe takes, but the universe gives back too. Sometimes we just have to be willing to see it. It’s the start of winter, my favorite season. I have savings, I have my camper van, and now I have some time for myself.
I’m sure I can convince my van buddy, Josie, to meet up. She’s bouncing around ski resorts in her van this winter. And we always like to hang out and explore a new small town or spend time outdoors.
Yeah, maybe this isn’t the worst idea I’ve ever had.