Chapter 46
GRACE
JAZZ HANDS
I wake up to the quiet sound of mumbling in my bed. I try to sit up, groaning when I feel each and every one of my muscles ache with the motion.
What the hell? Grogginess sets in and I force my eyes shut to keep the light out. I must have gone a little too crazy at dinner with my family because I don’t even remember it or leaving.
“I’m going back to bed, Tommy,” I murmur, ready to sleep off what already feels like the worst hangover I’ve ever had. I try to snuggle back into bed, grabbing my pillow and burying my face in it.
The smell of disinfectant and bleach immediately fill my nose with each breath. The scratchy fabric tells me instantly that I’m not in Tommy’s bed — our bed. My eyes immediately fly open at the unpleasant sensations and I sit straight up, ignoring the pain shooting through my muscles and joints.
There’s no doubt in my mind where I am. Before I even look around the room, I already know I’m back in a place I never wanted to be again.
Panic sets in at the thought of those days after the car accident that claimed months of my life as a teenager. Anxiety and adrenaline bring back another rush of memories, reminding me how I got here.
Agnes, the moose. Josie whistling. Watching as Kayleigh got buried. Then silent, hopeless blackness…
My breathing quickens as panic takes over and I fist the sheets at my side. My eyes scan the room, fully aware of where I am now.
Clay is sitting on the far side next to my grandparents.
Tanner is standing in the corner, by the door, with Veronica, who is talking to a doctor.
All of it reminds me of waking up in that room a decade ago.
All the more highlighted by the fact that Dad is at my side, and Mom isn't here, just like that day.
I feel pressure on my wrist and look down to see Dad’s hand squeezing me, making my breathing slow down ever so slightly.
“Hey. Hey,” he says, making a gentle shushing sound. I see the look in his eyes, beckoning me to stay calm. “You’re fine. Everything’s going to be OK.”
“Where’s Tommy?” I ask.
My dad looks to Tanner who simply nods. “I was just going to call him.”
Tanner pulls out his phone, and steps out of the room into the hall. I look back to Dad. “How long have I been here? How long was I asleep?”
“Josie said you were buried for about five minutes before she got to you. You were unconscious when she found you, and she called search and rescue. They brought you straight here by helicopter. That was about two hours ago.”
My breathing slows down another notch until a far worse realization dawns on me. “Wait. Where’s Kayleigh?”
He winces, causing my anxiety to spike again. The look of horror in Kayleigh’s eyes when the avalanche hit us crashes into my psyche, making my entire body tense. She was in the direct path of it compared to me and I was still totally buried.
Clay, Kayleigh’s best friend since high school, clears his throat.
“Josie’s with Kayleigh since she doesn’t have any family here with her and they let her in.
She’s still unconscious.” I look over at him to find him wringing his hands and a muscle ticking in his jaw.
“They wouldn’t let me in, but I caught the search and rescue team that brought her in and Josie has been giving me updates.
She broke her leg and they’re checking her for other injuries still. ”
“Clay,” I say, trying to get him to look up.
My voice is weak and my throat is sore as my adrenaline wears off.
This is all my fault. I’m the one who has been begging her to do this with me for years.
I should have known it wasn’t right to push her to come with me given how important her olympic career and training are.
“Miss Chapman.” The unfamiliar voice of the doctor interrupts our silent sibling exchange.
I look over to see him eyeing me over his clipboard.
“You're both unbelievably lucky Josie was there to dig you out, and call for search and rescue to get there as fast as they did. Your friend, Miss Jensen, is in good hands though. Now please, try to get some rest.”
He turns for the door and steps out, leaving it cracked behind him.
I look back to my dad, who’s still holding my wrist. “Please, get Tommy here.”
He smiles warmly at me and nods.
My mind is overwhelmed by feelings and memories that are coming back to me.
But through all of them, one stands out.
That feeling of need for him followed by the crushing fear of thinking I would never see him again.
That was the last thing that I remember before waking up here and it still hasn’t changed.
I need him here, with me — my calm and steady.
Commotion at the door and the sound of raised, agitated voices pulls my attention away from Dad.
“Yeah. I’m related.” As if my mere thoughts summoned him, he’s here for me.
Even from outside the room, I can feel the urgency in his voice, and the all consuming bond between us. It’s ever-present, always pulling us together.
Despite every ache in my body, I want to — no, not want, need — I need to give into it, get up, and walk to him.
I shift my body and swing my legs over the side of the bed that I already am committed to getting the hell out of as soon as the doctor isn’t within earshot.
My dad puts his arm out, trying to stop me.
Then I hear him say it. His voice is a low growl, but still clear enough for my entire family to hear.
“She’s my wife.”
Every head in the room snaps to the door as Tommy, my husband, pushes his way past the doctor and strides to the side of my bed.
Our eyes meet and it feels like a weight heavier than the crushing snow of the avalanche has been lifted off me. It’s like I can finally breathe again.
I see it in his eyes too, his posture visibly softening when he sees me sitting up in the bed. My dad, with a surpassingly calm look on his face, steps aside.
Tommy says nothing, just wrapping me in his arms, pulling me tight into his chest. I melt into his warmth, sinking into his embrace. His familiar scent fills my lungs and I hear the sound of his racing heart, making me feel whole.
“I’m here, Rainbow.” His voice is hoarse and ragged. He presses a kiss to the top of my head and rubs soothing circles on my back, bringing my pulse back under control.
“What the fuck?” My brother’s deep, gruff voice cuts through the room. Tommy and I both turn to see Tanner standing in the doorway next to the doctor.
The doctor awkwardly shuffles on his feet. “I’m going to give you some time as a family.” He steps out of the room and silence sets in.
I feel everyone’s eyes on Tommy and me.
“Surprise?” My voice trails up in question. I raise my hands to the sides of my head, waggling my splayed fingers in jazz hands.
Tommy leans down and whispers into my ear. “That was cringier than my use of emojis and you know it.”
To my pleasant surprise, Clay and Veronica both cover their mouths to hide their laughter. I’m glad to see they’re still on my side.
Tanner shoots Veronica a sidelong glance. “You think it’s funny that they got married and didn’t tell us? They’ve known each other for months.” He looks back at me. “When did this even happen?”
She smirks, raising her eyebrows at him. “I’m pretty sure you proposed to me after we dated for two months.”
He groans and scrubs his hand over his face. “That’s different. She’s—”
“I’m what?” I cut him off, staring daggers at him. “Too young? Too fragile? Still too broken to make my own choices?”
He winces and stays silent.
Tommy’s hand still works on my back rubbing my stiff muscles. It’s like he can sense my apprehension about being back in a hospital room, with my entire family, and he’s trying to will it away with his touch.
I look back at my family and shrug. “And to answer your question, it was in Tahoe last month. We just knew. It felt right. We wanted this and went to a wedding chapel one night on the Nevada side of the lake.”
Tanner looks genuinely stunned and angry. Through his rugged exterior, I don’t miss the little bit of hurt in his eyes.
“We were going to tell everyone tonight,” Tommy says. I look up to see him still peering down at me with nothing but love and affection.
I smile up at him before turning back to my brother. “So I guess you guys get to find out now instead.”
I look over to see Grandma, her eyes flicking back and forth between Tommy and me.
She’s grinning ear to ear, just like she was at Tanner’s wedding when she first met Tommy at the reception.
I swear she might burst if she gets any more excitement today.
At least this is good news compared to the reason she came to the hospital.
“Dad, are you really OK with this?” Tanner stands there, turning his palms up.
A laugh I haven’t heard in ages, practically a boyish giggle comes from beside the bed. Beside Tommy, my dad is smiling and shaking his head. I haven’t seen him smile or laugh that way since Mom died.
He ignores my brother and replaces Tommy at my side, who reluctantly takes a step back. “Grace, honey, if your mom would be proud of anything, it would be this. This is the most her thing you’ve ever done.”
Tears pricks the corner of my eyes. I only ever wanted my family to accept my decisions.
Their approval would never stop me from doing what I want, but hearing him say that, right now, means more than he could ever know.
Although from the look in his eyes, I’m pretty sure he might have at least some clue.
“You guys got married on the ranch,” Tanner says, still clearly not thrilled.
Another laugh, this time from Grandpa, in the corner of the room. “No they didn’t. Your mom and your dad were the most impatient teens we’d ever seen.”
Tanner looks to Grandpa and then Dad, whose warm grin only widens.
Grandpa laughs again. “The wedding on the ranch wasn’t their actual wedding.
We did that because your mom and dad drove to Vegas the day after they graduated high school and got married.
We didn’t want to upset all of our friends and family in the whole damn town, so we did that wedding.
You know how small towns are. We’d have never heard the end of it if there wasn’t a wedding for everyone to come to. ”
A moment passes where everyone in the room looks around in stunned disbelief. Even I didn’t know that story, but knowing Mom, it makes so much more sense than the wedding I've seen in the family photo album.
Sensing my oldest brother’s lingering apprehension, my dad gestures between Tommy and me.
“Look at his face and tell me he doesn’t love her as much, or maybe even more, than any of us.
I was a bit worried he was going to throw the doc through the damn wall when he got here.
As far as I’m concerned, he’s part of this family now. ”
This time, Tanner looks between Tommy and me. I finally, finally see his expression soften. The corner of his lips tug up into a remorseful smile and he gives me one curt nod.
“Welcome to the family, TJ.” Everyone in the room looks over to see Dad extending a hand toward Tommy.
A wave of emotion hits me all at once. Never once in my adult life did I think I’d find a man I’d want to call my own. Now my dad, still as tall and rugged as my brothers, is holding his hand out for the man of my dreams — my husband — to shake.
I know how much this means to Tommy too.
He might have Jake, but he's never truly had a family to call his own. I don’t even think my dad realizes the meaning of what he just said to him.
Tommy swallows hard and I can see him trying to hold back his emotions.
He extends his hand and gives my dad’s one firm pump.
“Thank you, sir.”
“Hold on a second.” A familiar voice practically squeals. “Did someone say married?”
We all look over to the door to see Lizzy, still in the hallway but poking her head in the cracked door.
Clay groans. “Fuck it. The doctor’s gone. Get in here, Princess. Join the party.”
She wastes no time making her way to her fiancé and sitting in his lap. It’s standing room only in here, fitting given that Tommy finally showed up. She looks at Veronica and then me. “You know you’re going to have to spill all the tea later, right?”