Chapter 46 #3
My mother was crying openly now, and I hated knowing I’d caused it. But I couldn’t see a way to make it better without breaking something inside myself.
“We just want your life to be easier,” she whispered.
I closed my eyes. Everything we’d been talking around for the last ten minutes came back to the same place.
“Mama. Papa.” My voice shook. “I love you.”
My mother’s breathing hitched. “I know.”
“No matter what happens next, that’s not changing. I need you to believe that.”
My father exhaled. When he spoke again, all the certainty had gone from his voice. “I don’t know what happens next.”
Neither did I.
Tomorrow I could wake up and discover I’d made the worst decision of my life.
The lawyers might tell me I was an idiot. The federation might spend years making things difficult. I might spend six months wondering what possessed me to leave everything familiar behind.
The possibility was real.
So was the thought of getting on that plane anyway.
My mother said my name quietly, the way she used to when I was a child, and the sound cracked something in my chest.
“I’ll call you,” I promised.
I wasn’t sure whether she believed me. I wasn’t sure I believed myself, but it was all I had to offer.
The call ended a few minutes later.
I stood by the window for a long time afterward, staring out across the city. Somewhere beyond the skyline, life was carrying on exactly as it always had. Nothing had changed.
I thought about the boy I’d been at fourteen. About Dean.
About the future waiting for me on the other side of one phone call.
Then I reached into my pocket and pulled out Helen’s business card.
This time, when I looked at the number written beneath her name, my hand didn’t shake.
Dean
The Village had gone unusually quiet.
That never really happened during the Olympics. Somewhere down the corridor a door slammed, followed by laughter and the unmistakable sound of athletes determined to celebrate long past a sensible bedtime. The noise faded as quickly as it had come.
Inside my room, Luka sat in the chair by the window. When he heard me come in, he turned.
“Hey.”
I dropped my room key onto the desk and shrugged out of my jacket.
“So how was Mila?”
He chuckled. “Sensible in a way that was almost scary.”
“I’ll tell her you said that.”
Luka gave an exaggerated gulp. “Please don’t.”
I crossed the room and stood beside him, slipping an arm around his shoulders. He leaned into me, an air of fatigue clinging to him.
I tilted his face toward me with my fingertips. “Hey. What is it?”
“My parents called.”
My stomach clenched. “How bad was it?”
He sighed. “They love me very much.”
“Oh.” I hadn’t expected that.
He let out a breath. “I think that’s what made it so difficult.”
I pressed a kiss against his hair and waited.
The story of the call came slowly, pieces of it scattered through long stretches of quiet while he untangled thoughts he’d probably been carrying around for years.
By the time he finished, I wasn’t sure what to say.
There wasn’t a solution. I didn’t have a reassuring speech that could fix the fact that loving someone didn’t always mean understanding them.
I settled for honesty. “I’m sorry.”
Luka nodded. “So am I.”
Then I noticed the business card resting on the table beside him. I recognized it in a heartbeat. My pulse raced. I looked from the card to Luka.
He reached across and turned the card over beneath his fingertips, gazed up at me…
And smiled.
Warmth spread through my chest.
“Ah.”
Luka laughed, the sound brighter than I’d heard from him in a while.
“Is that all?”
I blinked. “What exactly do you want from me?”
“I don’t know.”
“Good.” I took his hand in mine. “Because I don’t have a prepared speech.”
He smirked. “That’s disappointing.”
“I can panic and make one up if you’d like.”
His smile widened. “I think you’ve already done enough panicking for both of us.”
I shrugged. “That’s fair.” I threaded my fingers through his.
The tension I’d been carrying around for the past two days eased a little.
Luka had stopped looking trapped. I’d seen it the moment I walked through the door.
I brought his hand to my mouth and brushed a kiss across his knuckles. “I’m proud of you.”
Luka looked away. “I thought there would be a moment when I’d just know.”
I smiled. “My dad says moments like that are a myth.”
Luka groaned. “Your father has an opinion about everything.” His arm wound its way around my waist.
“He says most people spend their lives waiting to feel ready, and by the time they realize they never will, half their opportunities have already passed them by.”
Luka shook his head. “I hate it when your family makes so much sense.”
“You and me both.”
That earned me another laugh.
After that neither of us felt any great need to keep talking, especially when I tugged him toward the bed and undressed him.
“This could be our last night together for a while,” he murmured as I kissed his neck.
“Then let’s make the night last as long as possible.” I couldn’t resist. “Dad says sleep is for the weak anyway.”
He rolled his eyes. “Of course he does.”
Tomorrow would arrive soon enough.
Tonight, there was only me and Luka.