Chapter 12
Wesley
I cast the line into the creek and watch it drift with the slow current.
“Mom said you were out here,” Dad’s voice comes from behind me, steady and sure as always.
I don’t say anything, just nod. He settles onto the carved-out log seat beside me.
“Rough day?” he finally asks.
I sigh. “Something like that.”
He waits. Doesn’t push, just waits.
“It’s Addison,” I say, like that’s enough reason.
“She okay?”
“I don’t know,” I admit. “I said something I shouldn’t have.”
“Which was?”
Not even wanting to say it, I cast my line out again. I set my rod down, sit on the other log, and look up at Dad.
“I told her she was putting Brantley before God. That I won’t be a friend who supports her bad decisions.”
“So…little harsh.”
“I hung up on her too.”
“That’s usually how it goes.” He lets out a laugh followed by a sigh.
“She didn’t come to Sunday school. Said Brantley didn’t want to go.” I shake my head. “And I lost it, I guess. I’ve been trying to get her to see the bigger picture and also trying to support her. But watching him treat her like he does—” I stop, my jaw tight. “I can’t.”
Dad scrapes his boot across the stones before looking at me again. “Loving someone doesn’t mean you beat them with your opinion.”
“I wasn’t trying to.” I rub a hand over my face. “I just…she doesn’t see it the way I can. From the outside. It’s like she’s just waiting for him to change overnight and he’s not going to. She’s wasting her time.”
“Wes, that’s for her to figure out. You tried to help, sounds like a few times, and all you can do now is give her space to breathe. Love her from a distance. You can’t make her see what she doesn’t want to.”
I nod. My throat is thick when I say, “She’s not even mine, but I’m scared I already lost her.”
“For right now, maybe.”
“I don’t know what to do now,” I admit. Looking down at my hands. This feeling of guilt weighing on me is heavier than anything I’ve felt before.
“You be like Jesus.”
I look at him. “You think I should be crucified?” I say in mock offense.
“No! No, of course not!” He laughs. “You pray for her. Be patient and don’t stop loving her. Just like Jesus.”
Those words hit me hard.
“I really do love her,” I admit out loud for the first time. I hold my breath, not wanting to look up.
“I know you do,” Dad says. My eyes flick to him. He’s got a smile on his face as he stands.
As he walks back up towards the house, I let the peace and quiet settle. The guilt in my chest still barely letting up. I have a feeling it’s going to stay this way for a while.
I reel in my line slowly. The hook’s empty.
Figures.
* * *
I take my time walking back up from the creek, boots brushing through the field towards the house. I’m glad my dad came to talk; we don’t do that much. He isn’t one for feelings and neither am I. Guess that’s where I get it.
When I get to the driveway, I see Jesse’s truck. He and Blake are standing outside talking while Caden mills around, a stick in hand. Jesse spots me and nods me over. Blake takes Caden’s hand and heads back towards their house.
My stomach knots more with each step I take forward.
“Catch anything?” he asks, his tone even.
“Nah,” I say, standing a few feet away. I look at him as he leans against his truck door and crosses his arms loosely over his chest, staring at me for just a beat.
“Addison talked to Ella,” he says.
I swallow hard, setting my fishing rod and tackle box aside. “Yeah?”
“She’s pretty upset, man.”
I nod once. The weight getting even heavier now. “I know.”
“If it means anything”—Jesse exhales—“I’d rather she be upset because of Brantley. I hate that I have to be the one standing here talking to you about it.”
That stings.
I shift my weight, jaw tight. “I didn’t mean it like it came out.”
He pushes off his truck, taking a half step forward. “Doesn’t matter.”
“Huh. I know, I just—”
“You’re in love with her.”
My heart stops, jaw clenches, and I hold the air in my chest. Jesse doesn’t flinch.
“Stop denying it,” he adds quickly. “Everyone already knows.”
I let out a breath. “She doesn’t,” I mutter.
“No, she doesn’t, but I wish you’d tell her already. End this nonsense.”
I shake my head. “Not when she’s with him. I’m not gonna make her choose like that.”
Jesse thinks for a minute, like I actually have a good point.
“Yeah,” he mutters. “I respect that, I do. But don’t walk out on her when things get rocky; don’t do what I did to Ella.”
If that’s not a reality check, I don’t know what is. Part of me forgot everything Jesse and Ella had been through. The ten-year breakup. God, take me now if I have to wait that long for this girl to come to her senses. I’m not strong enough to bear it.
I clear my throat. “As much as I don’t want to, I think a little distance might help.”
Jesse reaches for his truck handle. “Just don’t go too far.”
He starts his truck, the engine rumbling my chest, and diesel exhaust swirls into the air. He gives me a nod goodbye and drives out towards the road. Which leaves me standing there, still feeling the weight of everything hanging over my head.