Chapter Forty
CHAPTER
FORTY
For the first few days back at the chateau, Felicity revelled in being surrounded by her family and the animals again. There was a new puppy she hadn’t met before, and everyone was delighted to see her.
‘You’ve got such an English accent!’ Alexandra had said when she first arrived home. Everyone was sitting round the table in the kitchen following a long lunch. There was cheese and nuts from the estate on the table, as well as various bottles of wine and local liqueurs. ‘You sound like you’re a proper dolly bird from London!’
Felicity exhaled. ‘I spent all my time in London trying to convince people I was half English. No one believed me!’
‘Being half French must have been considered very exotic, surely,’ said Alexandra.
Felicity smiled. ‘Not really. And if you are one of Oliver’s relations, it is assumed that if you are French then you are – well, no better than you ought to be.’
Alexandra obviously didn’t know how to react to this. She looked across at Antoine, hoping he’d know what to say. ‘You mentioned how stuffy they were in your letter,’ she said when her husband didn’t immediately answer.
‘Well, chérie , I am glad you have picked up some good English idioms, but I am sad and a little angry that you have been made to feel unwelcome,’ he said.
‘I must say,’ said Alexandra, ‘Oliver’s family sound ghastly. Are they all like that?’
‘Well, his father is very conventional and stern. He wants Oliver to join the army like his brothers. But Maman thinks Oliver’s father is dashing and sexy.’
‘Is Oliver handsome?’ asked Alexandra.
Felicity shrugged. ‘Perhaps. But it doesn’t matter. I never have to see him again.’ Unless of course Oliver’s father and her mother got married, but she didn’t want to suggest this idea now; it was too complicated.
Alexandra’s expression seemed to doubt this statement.
‘No, really. He nearly got us both drowned.’ Felicity got up, ready to move the conversation on. ‘Shall I start clearing the table?’
Felicity spent time with her siblings, was helpful to her parents and went for long walks with Milou, their beloved hunting dog.
It was beautiful at the chateau; spring was coming at last and there was no lovelier place to be. So why were her thoughts continually in a city where it always seemed cold and wet and she had very few friends?
Then, one evening, Felicity overheard her parents talking about her in the hall. She was out of sight up the stairs.
‘She’s being so good and helpful,’ said her father.
‘I know! She left here a teenager and has come back a young woman,’ said Alexandra.
‘But not a happy young woman.’
‘She’s heartbroken. That will take a while to recover from.’ Felicity felt that Alexandra understood heartbreak.
‘But is this the best place for that?’ said her father. ‘I know it’s home and comforting and she loves it here. But I feel—’
‘Hang on!’ Alexandra paused. ‘She can’t hear us, can she? She’s only just gone upstairs. Let’s go into the salon.’
Felicity carried on to her bedroom. She could have gone downstairs and interrupted the conversation in the salon but what was the point? She knew her parents would be talking about her in a kind and concerned way, but her broken heart was something she had to deal with herself. No one could help her. What she had also discovered was that while it was lovely to go back to being the daughter of the house, beloved, a little spoilt, it wasn’t helping her put thoughts of Oliver behind her.
Later she went to find her stepmother, who had finally got her little boys to sleep.
‘Can I get you a drink or something, Alexandra?’ she asked. ‘I’d like a chat, but I know you must be tired.’
‘I’m never too tired for a chat with you, chérie . Let’s both have a glass of wine. We can take it into the salon. No one’s there now and the fire is going.’
Alexandra produced a box of chocolates from a drawer in the salon. ‘I keep these here for emergencies,’ she explained. ‘Now, what is it you want to say? Although I think I can guess.’
‘I think I want to go back to London. I know I ran away, but now I wonder if it was the right thing to do?’
Alexandra nodded. ‘You’ve had some rest, a while to think about everything that has happened and have spent some time with your family. But as you’ve discovered, your problems and your feelings follow you around like a bad smell.’
Felicity laughed. ‘How do you know all this?’
Alexandra laughed. ‘I’m a woman. And if I was you, I would fight for my man! The thing is, darling, you told me you ran out of the room the moment that girl’s lips touched his. You don’t know how Oliver reacted. He might have shoved her away, been angry with her. She might not mean a thing to him! Don’t accept your version of what happened when you may not know the whole story.’
‘I tried to talk to him later but we had the most awful row. And then he did nearly get us both drowned.’
‘That was an accident. He didn’t do it on purpose.’
‘Even if it was, I still can’t be sure if he’s the right man for me.’
‘You don’t know, and you’re still very young, but you have to check. Don’t you hate it in books when the couple keep away from each other when a few words of conversation could sort it all out?’
Felicity was silent for a few moments. ‘Yes, I certainly do hate that. But what will I say to my mother? I said goodbye and I think she was glad to see me go. She prefers life as a single woman to being a parent.’
‘You need to find an excuse to go back. Did you leave something there?’
Felicity nodded. ‘Actually I did leave my boots in the car that Oliver borrowed.’ She smiled ruefully. ‘And my heart of course. But it was broken anyway, probably not worth collecting.’
Alexandra smiled. ‘Shall we ask Antoine? He might have a good idea or two.’
Felicity nodded. ‘Will he mind, do you think?’
‘Not if it’s what’s best for you.’
‘I am so lucky to have a father I can talk to. And a stepmother who isn’t at all wicked.’ She laughed. ‘Everyone assumed that if I had a stepmother who wasn’t very old, she must be wicked. But you are a better mother than Lucinda.’
‘Lucinda loves you very much,’ said Alexandra. ‘But she may find being a parent difficult. I didn’t have parents so I had to learn from scratch – from you three, actually. I think it’s sometimes better to learn for yourself and not just do what’s been done before.’
Felicity found she couldn’t speak, so gave Alexandra a hug instead.
Antoine was indeed quite useful. ‘It is your mother’s birthday next week. Why don’t you go back and surprise her?’
‘But Maman hates birthdays! She never wants to get old!’
‘She won’t hate a bottle of her favourite perfume which is hard to buy in London,’ Antoine said. ‘I have to go to Antibes tomorrow. I’ll buy a bottle and you can give it to her.’
Later, when Felicity and Alexandra were alone together, Alexandra said, ‘Do I mind that your father remembers your mother’s birthday and what her favourite perfume is?’
‘No,’ said Felicity firmly. ‘You are the woman who makes him happy, and he gave you a lovely pair of earrings for your last birthday. It only shows that he has a good memory.’
‘And there’s nothing wrong with that!’ said Alexandra, giving her stepdaughter another hug.