Chapter 1
CHAPTER ONE
NATALIA
The distant echo of a slamming door slices through Amy Winehouse blasting in my ears. I slip my headphones off my head and let them hang around my neck, muffling the sound of “Valerie”.
I spin in my desk chair to find Ellie pressing her back against the door, slowly sliding down the length of it until she hits the floor, pulling her knees to her chest. My own chest tightens as I take in the tears streaming from her eyes, making the green in them glisten.
Her cheeks are flushed, bottom lip swollen as if she’s been chewing on it the way she often does when worried.
She folds over her knees, her auburn-colored bun bouncing atop her head with the movement.
“Ells?” I ask, immediately lifting from my chair and crossing my dorm to sit in front of her. “What’s wrong, babe?”
I hate seeing her like this. I’ve only seen Ellie cry a few times in the two years we’ve been best friends, but each time guts me more than the last. Seeing her upset triggers a compulsive need to solve her problems and find her joy.
I can’t stand it when she’s sad; it makes me want to start throwing things.
She takes a shuddering breath, lifting her head and knocking it back against the door as she stares up at the ceiling.
After taking a moment to compose herself, she finally whimpers, “I just got a notice that beginning next semester, I’m going to lose my financial aid.
” Her nose scrunches just before another stream of tears spills from her eyes.
“What the fuck am I supposed to do, Nat? I can’t afford to pay full price for tuition and housing, and I can’t live off student loans. ”
I place a hand on her thigh, rubbing soothing circles over her knee. “Well, like I said, there is always a place for you in the house I’m renting with the other figure skaters. I know all the rooms are claimed, but you and I could share one if it came down to it.”
“Doesn’t matter.” She sighs, shaking her head as she wipes her tears with a trembling hand. “If I can’t pay tuition, I’m dropping out.”
“Don’t say that, Ells,” I snap. “We’ll figure it out. What’s the reason they pulled your aid?”
“Costs were covered under the faculty family policy. Since Mom was married to Hudson, my tuition and housing in the dorm was covered. Now that the divorce has been finalized…well...” She rolls her eyes, huffing an incredulous laugh.
“My mom having an affair with my boyfriend. The gift that keeps on giving.”
“Your mother is a cunt.”
I fucking hate Candace Grant—well, she’s back to Candace Harris now. She’s always been a stage mother, over-controlling about Ellie’s hockey playing and attempting to live vicariously through her young daughter since Candace clearly peaked in her twenties.
I’m sure it was a slew of insecurity and deep-seated self-hatred that led her to have an affair with a twenty-year old mentee of her husband’s, her daughter’s own boyfriend.
Nothing else could explain how she would risk the fine-as-fuck man she was married to for the human-equivalent of a goblin shark that is Bodhi Granger.
And while I’m at it, fuck him too.
Ellie is the clear winner between herself and her mother, and while he may be a raging sociopath with the IQ of a gerbil, Bodhi still should’ve known better than to fuck with Ellie like that.
In the six months since Ellie discovered their affair—by walking in on the two of them in bed, no less—her entire life has fallen apart.
Luckily, Bodhi had the decency to transfer schools, and everyone involved agreed to keep the scandal under wraps, if for nothing more than to protect Ellie and Hudson from the aftermath.
It didn’t change the fact that Ellie’s relationship with her mother is ruined, as is much of her self-worth. Now, apparently, she’s also being stripped of her means to attend school, play on the girl’s hockey team, and get an education without going into debt.
So, the fact stands: Candace is a cunt.
Ellie nods. “She is. But it doesn’t change anything now.”
I sit up on my knees, extending my arms to her shoulders and tugging her into me, cupping the back of her head and pressing it to my chest as I rest my chin atop it.
“Just give yourself a few days to relax, and let me figure something out. I promise you, I will. I won’t survive the next two years of school without you, and I never skate as well when you’re not in the rink with me.
” I laugh, kissing the top of her head. “I’m not letting you go anywhere. ”
She exhales a shaky sigh, locking her arms around the small of my back. My tank top has ridden up enough that her pinky brushes my bare skin, and warmth sparks where she touches me. “I can’t survive without you either, Nat.”
***
I don’t bother knocking before I push open the door to Hudson Grant’s office beneath the arena.
He’s focused on his laptop screen, but his head snaps up, icy gaze landing on me, when he hears me enter.
Thick brows knit in the center of his forehead, and his soft lips pout beneath his dark, manicured beard.
He’s fucking delicious.
He assesses me slowly as I step up to his desk and slide onto the edge of it, my hips right at eye-level. “Hi, Coach.”
I watch his throat move as he swallows, eyes roaming my body, snagging on my thighs, before forcing themselves back to his screen. “If this is about the boys taking over the skater’s ice time, I’ll talk to them about it.”
“It’s not,” I chime. “You know I wouldn’t come to you about that. I’ll just knock ‘em in the knees with their sticks, but it wouldn’t hurt if you told them to watch themselves anyway.”
“I’m sure, Natalia.” He sighs, and I love the way my name rolls off his tongue. “What can I do ya for?”
I raise a brow slowly, smirking, the insinuation of his question abundantly clear.
I don’t miss the heat of his cheeks beneath his beard, and I preen at the sight.
I don’t know Hudson Grant well, but I’ve interacted with him enough around the rink and in the few instances I spent with him and the family during the short eighteen-month period he was married to Candace.
I think he’s hot as hell, and I’m in no way embarrassed to make those thoughts well known.
“Have you checked on Ellie lately?” I ask.
He leans back in his chair, rubbing his jaw. “Not as often as I should, I suppose.”
“She’s struggling,” I say in a soft tone. “I don’t think anyone is going to be able to understand what she’s going through the way you do. You should call her more often.”
He nods contemplatively. “I check in when I see her around the rink, but now that the season is over, that’s not so often. I’m not really sure what the protocol is here; it’s not like I raised her. I met her mom when she was nineteen, and we were married for under two years.”
“Regardless.” I wave my hand. “She’s struggling.”
He stands abruptly, stark concern flashing across his features. “Why? What’s wrong?”
“Now that your divorce has been finalized, the university pulled her financial aid. She’s considering dropping out because she doesn’t think she has any other options.”
“Fuck,” he mutters. “I didn’t even think about that.” He bites his lip as he begins to pace back and forth behind his desk. “Candace should be doing something about this.”
“You know she’s not going to take a hand-out from her mother.”
Chewing on his cheek, he nods with understanding. “I mean…I might be able to help out with rent somewhere—”
“I think you should ask her to move in with you.”
Hudson rears back, looking at me dumbfounded. “That’s ridiculous.”
“Why?” I uncross my legs, swiveling myself on the edge of his desk so I’m facing him head-on. “She was supposed to be living with you next semester anyway. The only factor removed is her horrible mother.”
“That’s the point,” he dead-pans. “If I’m no longer married to her mom, it would be inappropriate to have my ex-wife’s adult daughter living with me.”
“I mean…it’s only inappropriate if you make it so, Coach.” I toss him a saccharine smile. “Are you feeling inappropriate?”
I straighten, not missing the way Hudson’s eyes dart to my bare thighs before snapping to my face again. He swallows, and the slightest hint of a blush accents his cheeks.
“Of course not.” He clears his throat. “Just concerned for the way it would look.”
“Ellie doesn’t have a lot of friends,” I say.
“I don’t think there would be many people concerned about her living circumstances outside the university itself when they verify she’s still eligible for the financial aid credit—which, now that you’re divorced, she can only receive if she’s living with you.
” I shrug. “I think, in that capacity, the school would see it as you helping out your step-daughter.”
“I don’t see her as a step-daughter,” he grumbles.
“Does it matter? As long as the school looks at it that way, you can see her as a roommate,” I argue, though I’m curious about the insistence in his tone.
Hudson sighs, and I don’t miss the way his eyes track my figure once again before they raise to meet my own. If I’m not mistaken, I spot a bit of hunger in his gaze, and I’m never mistaken when it comes to a man’s—or woman’s—look of desire.
“Give me a night to think about it. I’ll call Ellie tomorrow,” he murmurs.
I lean forward, eliminating the hazed space between us as I land a pat to his cheek. He doesn’t even flinch when my palm touches his face, but I hear the audible inhale from his lips when our skin meets.
“Good.” His eyes don’t leave mine when I purr, “See you soon, Coach.”