Chapter 24
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
NATE
Blackstone, New Hampshire
Jed claps his hand on my shoulder. “This is it, kid,” he says. He’s only five years older than me, so I assume he’s used to talking to his own children this way. “This is going to change your life. You’re one hundred percent sure you want to do this?”
I nod. Even though this isn’t happening the way I wanted it to, I still know that buying the majority share of Blackstone is a smart investment.
Originally I did this more for Jackson than anything else—to preserve the mountain she loved and help it grow in a way that would allow it to retain its independent, small-town feel.
But it’s a smart investment even if she’s not involved.
And this mountain, where I raced for two years in high school while falling in love with Jackson, has sentimental value for me as well.
“It’s not going to be too hard on you, being here all the time even if you’re not with her?”
“You’re my lawyer, Jed, not my therapist.”
He bristles a tad at my comment, evidenced only because his lip twitches and he tightens his grip on my shoulder.
“It’s my job to make sure you make good decisions.
And I want to know you’re not pissing away this many millions of dollars on a project you’ll lose interest in or that will take a toll on you emotionally. ”
There’s no way this isn’t going to take a toll on me emotionally, but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to do it. This is a smarter investment in my future than racing, so after this season I’ll be back in Blackstone growing my business and leading this mountain toward a more sustainable future.
“It’ll be fine,” I tell him.
“Okay,” he says, reaching for the door to the conference room.
Behind it sits Blackstone’s entire board of directors, including Jackson’s dad and her race coach from high school.
People I thought would be like family to me by now, but as usual Jackson’s inability to fully give her heart away has prevented that.
“Let’s do it,” I say, nodding my chin toward the door. Jed swings it open, and we walk in.
Thirty minutes and a shit ton of signing paperwork later, I officially own fifty-one percent of Blackstone, and the rights to expand the backside of the mountain and build a small village with a world-class hotel there.
Once the paperwork is signed, every member of the board comes over to shake my hand, welcoming me into their fold.
Except for Rory Shanahan. He stands at the head of the table with his arms crossed, immobile until every other board member has left.
Rory looks at Jed, then back at me.
“Should I wait outside?” Jed asks.
“Sure, I’ll meet you there in a minute,” I tell him.
Rory’s shoulders relax a tad when Jed leaves, but he still stands there with his arms crossed. “I don’t have to tell you how epically you fucked up this time, do I?” he asks.
My spine stiffens. “I fucked up? With Jackson, you mean?” He nods in response. “Rory, she left me. And I had to find out she resigned from my coach.”
“All I know is that my baby is sitting at home with a broken heart. And you are once again to blame.”
I think my heart skips a beat when I hear the word home. “Jackson is here?”
He nods again. “And she’s even more messed up than last time you left. Probably because this time she’s not trying to hide her feelings from everyone, telling us she’s okay when she’s clearly not.”
“I’d like to remind you that I left last time because you told me to,” I say. I’m not a teenager in need of fatherly advice, and he’s hardly one to give it, given the role he played in our split five years ago.
“That was the right decision at the time. You wouldn’t have made it back then, not the way you two were fighting and making up every few days. This was your chance. And you blew it. Whatever she needed from you when those photos were taken, you didn’t give it to her.”
Oh, he knows about the photos.
“How could I, when she left me? When she ran away back to Park City and then didn’t even get in touch? It’s been weeks and I haven’t heard from her once. I didn’t even know she was here.”
“Maybe because you ran back to Europe.” He voice is ice.
I focus on keeping my feet firmly planted on the floor, since my body seems to want to launch itself at him, my fists itching for a fight. Anything to release the pent-up anger at how Jackson left me.
“I was called back to Europe by my coach, and told that I’d lose my spot on the team if I delayed at all. I didn’t have a choice. It was Jackson’s choice not to call me like she said she would.”
“Did it ever occur to you,” he says as he drops his arms, shoving his hands into his pockets, “that maybe she didn’t call you because she had to find out from her former boss that you were back in Europe?
Did you ever stop to think how that looked?
Like you were leaving her, just like you did before? ”
I pause, wondering why that actually hadn’t occurred to me.
I’d been so focused on how she had left me, how she hadn’t called when she said she would.
She knew my back was better and that I was due to go back to racing.
Sure, I went back a little earlier than expected thanks to those photos being sent to my coach, but I didn’t leave her.
Did I?
Rory takes in my face, the way my shoulders have slumped. “You actually didn’t stop to think about that, did you?” he asks. I shake my head. “When did you guys get so bad at communicating? You were so good at it when you first started dating. Where did you go wrong?”
I think back to when Jackson and I were in high school, to the rumors and the misunderstandings we had to sort through, to our promise that we’d always be open and honest with each other.
That there’d be no secrets. Then I think about the years when she was racing on the World Cup circuit, when I was open and honest about wanting to marry her and about my jealousy over her friendship with Marco, but she kept from me the fact that she was planning on retiring.
And then we when got back together a few weeks ago, I was open and honest with her about my intentions, but she was still keeping secrets.
Then again, Blackstone is probably the biggest secret I’ve ever had and I couldn’t tell her about it either.
“I think you’ll have to ask her that question,” I tell Rory, “since she was the one telling me that we’d make this work whatever the cost, but not telling me that she was planning to move back here and work at Danforth.”
I can tell by the way Rory’s eyes go wide that he expected she’d told me about that.
“Right, so if you want to talk about people not communicating, keeping secrets that affect the other person’s life, maybe you need to talk to your daughter.” I reach into my bag and pull out a sealed manilla envelope. “And while you’re at it, give her this too.”
Rory glances at the envelope, his eyebrows dipping as he looks at it.
“It’s every shred of original evidence that those photos existed.
The original SD card they were taken on, as well as the only printed copies.
” I think back to the process of getting them from Johnny Todd, my nemesis in Big Sky.
I’d explained the entire situation to Jackson on a notecard tucked into that envelope.
I’d assured her that she didn’t have to worry about those photos ever being shared or published.
As mad as I was at her for the way she left me, I still wanted to put her mind at ease.
I was planning to overnight that envelope to her in Park City once this meeting was over.
As it turns out, that would have been a waste.
“Okay,” Rory says, eyeing the envelope in his hand like he’s holding a bomb. “I’ll give them to her. And I’ll see you tomorrow at the gala. You’re ready for that?”
“I am,” I tell him. Or at least, I will be by then.
The party’s in full swing when Rory steps up to the podium at the front of the room, next to the projection screen that’s been showing photos of the ski team on a loop for the last hour.
“It’s your big moment,” my dad says, smiling into his beer as he lifts the bottle to his lips.
“I don’t know why I feel so nervous.”
“Because you’re taking a big risk. You’d be foolish if you didn’t know that not everyone is going to love these changes.
And I didn’t raise you to be foolish.” Growing up, my dad wasn’t the most emotionally available parent.
He worked too much and he left most of the loving to my mom. But Dad never did anything halfway.
I think back to what I learned from him—how to always go after what you want, how to take calculated risks, how to persevere when things get tough, and how to know when to cut your losses.
And maybe most importantly, how to love someone with your whole heart.
He set that example in the way he loved my mom, and in the way he still loves her, five years after she died.
“No, you sure didn’t,” I say and tip back my drink too.
“You did good,” he tells me, glancing over and giving me a half smile because apparently it’d kill him to give me his full approval.
“I know.” I’m confident in my own decision-making abilities and I didn’t do this for his approval.
In fact, the only person whose approval I actually care about regarding this transaction is Jackson’s.
And given that her dad gave her those photos yesterday and I still haven’t heard from her, it’s safe to say that I probably never will—whether she agrees with my purchase of Blackstone or not.