Chapter 5 #2
The memory of Rossi’s sharp gaze and that pink flash of leather intertwine in my mind.
I sit there, staring at the flames as the noise of the party fades into the background.
My thoughts circle like a dog chasing its tail.
Because Dom’s right, both women are impossible, but damned if I can stop wanting them both.
He stretches his legs out and lets the firelight dance across his boots. He’s watching me. His expression is unreadable but knowing, like he’s already figured out where this is headed before I have.
“Not going to tell me?” His voice is casual but probing, opposite his usual demeanor. “That’s never a good sign.”
I take a long swig of my beer, letting the cool bitterness wash down the lump in my throat and setting the bottle beside me.
“Just thinking.”
“Thinking?” he echoes, a hum rumbling under his breath. “About the professor? Or the biker?”
“Does it matter?”
“Not really. I’m just fascinated by how you’re managing to juggle both in your brain without combusting. It’s impressive, in a self-destructive kind of way.”
I roll my eyes, leaning forward and resting my elbows on my knees.
“It’s not like that.”
The words feel hollow even as I say them. Hating the truth that both have consumed me to the point that I don’t know what to do, and it’s making me bitchy.
“I’m not juggling anything.”
Dom chuckles, low and quiet.
“You’re juggling, alright. You just haven’t realized it yet.”
I shoot him a look, but he doesn’t back down. His calm confidence grates on me, mostly because he’s usually right.
“They’re different,” I admit, the words slipping out before I can stop them.
“Professor Rossi. She’s sharp. Controlled.
She doesn’t take any shit. Least of all mine.
She doesn’t care who I am or who my family is.
And flirting with her, well shit, that gets me bounced from her class.
And the biker…” I trail off, the memory of the pink leathers and her reckless speed flashing in my mind. “She’s wild. Free. Fuck, it’s like—”
“Two sides of the same coin?” Dom finishes, his tone laced with amusement.
“Maybe.” I glance back at the flames, the tension in my chest tightening. “Or maybe I’m just fucked up enough to want what I can’t have.”
Dom hums again, but thoughtfully this time. He suddenly tosses a rock out of nowhere into the fire pit, and I watch it spark against the flames.
“You’ve always been like that, man. Chasing the unattainable. The thrill of it. You love climbing the mountain more than the view at the top.”
“I’m tired of climbing,” I mutter, more to myself than him.
“Bullshit. You live for the climb. It’s why you’re hung up on your professor,” he says with far too much conviction, launching another rock into the flames. “And the biker? She’s just another peak to conquer. You think either of them will be worth it once you reach the top?”
Would they be worth it?
Or would the thrill fade as quickly as it came, leaving me chasing the next impossible thing? Is that why I feel so restless?
“I don’t know. But I can’t just let either go. Both are mysteries, and it’s driving me crazy.”
Dom sighs, shaking his head.
“You’re playing with fire, Diego. You can’t chase both without getting burned.”
“Possibly.”
The noise of the party swells around us, Emilio’s voice cutting through the chaos as he cannonballs back into the pool, sending a wave of water splashing over the edge. Dom gestures toward the absurdity, saying something, but I put the spotlight on him when I remember what Hollister said.
“Holli said you like older women.” A mild reaction wrinkles across his face. The only one I get. “Said you have someone right now.”
“Is that a question or a statement?”
Dodging me will not work this time. I need help figuring out what to do, especially if I am pursuing a professor. I could use some tips.
“Come on, man. You know what’s up. If I have any shot at my professor, you know, likening the climb and not the view, how do I get her?”
Dom laughs, leaning back and stretching his arms over his head.
“You don’t get an older woman. They’re not a peak you climb. They’re not playing the same game as the girls you’re used to.”
I frown, wondering what the hell that’s supposed to mean.
“What?”
“They’ve already climbed the mountains, dumbass. They know what they want, and they’re not wasting time on some kid trying to figure himself out.”
I bristle at the word kid.
My jaw tightens.
“I’m not a kid. I’ve been on my own a long ass time. Traveled the world and shit.”
“Sure, you’re not,” he interrupts, a huff escaping with his words. “But to someone like your professor? You might as well be. Probably chasing a grade. She’s got a career, responsibilities, probably a shitload of baggage she’s not looking to unpack with a guy who’s barely out of undergrad.”
“I’m not ‘barely out,’” I argue, my voice edging with frustration as I stand. “And I’m not some clueless freshman chasing after her for a grade.”
Dom raises an eyebrow.
Skeptical as always.
“Then what are you chasing?”
“Fuck, stop saying chasing or climbing.”
But damn, if that question doesn’t make my chest tighten. It’s a good question. A great one, actually, but I don’t have an answer. At least, not one I’m willing to admit out loud. When I don’t respond, he levels me with a look.
“If you want any shot, you’ve got to bring something to the table. Something more than just the thrill of the chase for you.”
I tilt my head, trying to read between the lines even though I warned him not to use that word.
“Like what?”
“Confidence,” he says without hesitation, and I bristle because I have a shit ton of it.
“No, not the cocky bullshit you pull with everyone else, real confidence. She’s going to see through anything fake.
And respect. You’ve got to respect her time, her boundaries, her life.
You can’t bulldoze your way in and expect her to let you stay. ”
Well, shit.
That’s precisely what I have been doing. No wonder it hasn’t been working. It’s all wrong.
Dom rarely gives advice. At least, not like this, but when he does, it lands with a precision I fucking hate.
“And patience. You’re going to need a hell of a lot of that.”
“Patience?” I scoff, shaking my head. “I don’t exactly have time for patience. I’m graduating soon. She’s—”
“Already on a completely different timeline,” Dom interrupts, cutting me off with a raise of his hand. “If you think this is something you can rush, you’re already screwed.”
Patience isn’t exactly my strong suit.
Hell, waiting for my next adrenaline fix is hard enough, let alone waiting for someone like Professor Rossi to even consider me as more than just another student in her class.
“You learn all this from your old lady?” I turn the spotlight back on him to deflect from my hurt feelings and to stop him from spewing more truthful shit I don’t want to hear.
Dom chuckles, shaking his head.
“Hollister talks too much.” He suddenly clamps his hand on my shoulder, squeezing it hard. “Just meet this woman where she’s at. Prove you’re worth the risk.”
“The risk?”
“Think about it, Diego.”
He lets go of my shoulder, his gaze drifting around the party like he’s already planning his escape. That familiar restlessness settles on his face.
The one that says he’s about to bail and move on to something or someone more interesting. Probably to the older woman, he keeps sidestepping every time I bring her up.
“They’ve got their shit together. They’ve built their lives. Letting someone in, especially someone much younger, means risking everything they’ve worked for. You have to convince her you’re worth disrupting her world for.”
His words seep into my swirling thoughts to cause more mayhem than clarification.
“And with that sound advice, I’m out of here.”
He turns to walk away, but then stops as if he’s forgotten something. He glances over his shoulder.
“Text me if we’re riding tomorrow.”
He doesn’t wait for my reply, nor do I give it. Too preoccupied with his unwelcome advice of becoming everything opposite of what I am. Not cocky, no bullshitting, and patient.
Worth disrupting her world for.
That’s the climb.
And for the first time, I’m unsure if I’m ready for it.
If I ever will be.