Chapter 16 #2
“I felt small,” she admitted. “I’d failed at what I was trained to do. And I couldn’t bear being the fragile one. I told myself I needed time and space, but the truth is, I couldn’t stand the comparison. Not real or imagined. I couldn’t stand feeling like the surgeon who couldn’t save her own.”
Ford tilted her chin up gently so she had to look at him. “You think Hunt measures you that way?”
“He never said anything like that. He would never.” Her voice cracked. “That makes it worse.” The comparison lived entirely inside her.
“He’s lost people too,” Ford said carefully. “Different battles. Different fires. He’s buried people he couldn’t save.”
“That’s not the same.”
“It is,” Ford said firmly. “You don’t stop being gifted because one case breaks you.”
Tears slid freely now, but she didn’t look away. “I loved him,” she said. “Jonah wasn’t just a patient. He was… everything.”
Ford squeezed her hand.
“And when he died, I didn’t just lose him. I lost who I thought I was.”
“You didn’t run because you were weak,” Ford said. “You ran because you were shattered.”
She closed her eyes at that.
“And you rebuilt,” he continued. “Not in Jonah’s shadow. Not in your brother’s. You rebuilt here.”
Her breathing slowly steadied again. “I didn’t want Hunt to see me like that,” she whispered. “I was broken and inadequate.”
“He’s going to see a woman who built a functioning medical system on an island in the middle of nowhere,” Ford replied. “He’s going to see his sister holding the line during an outbreak.”
She let out a shaky breath. “I’m supposed to be the strong one.”
“You are,” Ford answered. “Strength isn’t never losing. It’s staying after you do.”
She searched his face for pity. There wasn’t any.
“You don’t get to carry Jonah’s death as proof you’re inadequate,” he said softly. “You loved him. You fought for him. That’s not failure. That’s devotion.”
Her shoulders finally dropped, the tension loosening by degrees. “I never said that out loud,” she admitted. “Not like that.”
He caressed her cheek. “You just did.”
She leaned forward against him, not collapsing this time, but choosing. He held her as the rain tapped faintly against the windows.
Hunter was coming. The past was coming with him. But for the first time since Jonah died, she didn’t feel like she had to outrun it.
He waited until he heard the guest room door close before heading into the master bath.
The shower came on with a low rush, steam beginning to fog the glass as hot water hit tile. He stood beneath it, head bowed, letting the heat loosen muscles that were clenched for days..
He glanced over his shoulder as the shower door slid open. Eira stepped in behind him, hair already damp, eyes steady. She didn’t rush. She simply closed the door and let the steam gather around them both.
“You went the wrong way,” he said softly.
She shook her head. “No. I didn’t.” She moved closer, the water catching her shoulders, tracing familiar lines he knew now by heart. Her hands came to rest at his waist.
He turned fully then, cupping her face, searching it for any hesitation. There was none.
They slowly kissed under the spray as their tension fully drained away.
The water cascaded over Ford’s shoulders, mixing with the heat radiating from Eira’s body as she pressed herself flush against his back.
Her fingers, slick with water and anticipation, traced the ridges of his chest, moving slowly upward until they tangled in the wet hair at the base of his neck.
She leaned in, standing on tiptoe, her breath hot against his ear, her lips grazing the sensitive skin there before her tongue darted out to explore.
Ford groaned low in his throat, tilting his head back to meet her. The water sluiced down his face, blurring his vision, but he could feel every inch of her. Her hips pressed against his ass, her breasts against his spine, and her legs tangled with his.
He let her lead. Her hands continued their journey, sliding down his torso, nails lightly scratching his skin as she urged him to turn around.
When he did, the water created a slippery place between their bodies.
She pulled his head down into a deep, demanding kiss, her tongue exploring his mouth with the same hunger that had driven her to bare her soul moments ago.
The glass door steamed up completely, sealing them off from the rest of the world, leaving only the sound of rushing water and their ragged breathing.
His hands found her waist, pulling her flush against him, feeling the slick heat of her skin against his palms. The shower head was positioned perfectly, the spray hitting her back and cascading over them both, heightening the sensation.
He lifted her slightly, and her legs wrapped instinctively around his waist as he ground his hips against hers. The contact was electric.
Her head fell forward against his shoulder, a soft moan escaping her lips that was swallowed by the sound of the shower. He kissed her neck, nipping lightly at the sensitive spot where her pulse throbbed, his hands roaming lower, gripping her hips firmly as he rubbed against her.
The tile wall pressed against her spine, cooling the heat spreading through her body, contrasting with the heat radiating from him. He nudged her legs apart, his knee sliding between them, forcing her to lean back against the wall.
He positioned himself, the slickness of her arousal mingling with the water to make his entry effortless. He thrust forward, burying himself deep in one fluid motion, and she cried out, her head falling back against the wet tile.
"Eira," he growled, his voice rough with need.
He didn't give her time to adjust, pulling back only to drive into her again, harder and faster.
The rhythm was primal, dictated by the rush of adrenaline and the lingering vulnerability of their earlier conversation.
Each stroke sent shockwaves through them.
Her nails dug into his shoulders, leaving red marks that disappeared under the streaming water. She wrapped her legs tighter around his waist, pulling him deeper. “More.”
He captured her mouth again, swallowing her gasps and moans, the kiss desperate. Only the sensation of their bodies slapping together and the ragged rhythm of their breathing existed.
He watched her face in the dim overhead light, her eyes wide and pupils dilated, completely lost in the pleasure he was giving her. He leaned down, biting gently at the sensitive curve of her neck.
Ford’s control snapped completely. He abandoned any pretense of gentleness, gripping her hips with bruising force as he drove into her with abandon.
The water beat against his back, but he barely felt it, consumed entirely by the heat of her body and the friction of their connection.
Eira cried out, her back arching so violently her head knocked back against the wall.
"Eira," he choked out, his voice straining.
She squeezed around him, her inner muscles rippling in a rhythm that drove him wild. With a final, guttural growl, he thrust deep one last time and held her there, emptying himself into her with a shudder that rattled his bones.
She fell against him, her legs trembling as her own release washed over her in a wave of delight. They stood there, panting and clinging to each other.