Chapter 45 #2
I pull my jeans back on while I wait for Cecilia to clean up in the bathroom and fight the urge to barge in there and join her.
When she comes back out, I scowl, not liking what I see.
“I uh … I should go.”
Absolutely not.
"You should stay," I insist, not liking the distance she's putting between us.
She shakes her head, arms crossed defensively over her chest. "No. This was a—"
I close the distance between us, my tone firm. "If you say this was a mistake, we're going to have a problem. Nothing about what we just did—" I gesture to the counter, still gleaming with our combined juices. I’ll need to clean that up before my roommates come home. "—was a mistake."
Her cheeks flush, and she avoids my gaze.
I refuse to let her retreat. Cupping her jaw, I force her attention back to me. "Nothing about that," I growl, "was a mistake. Do you hear me?"
“That’s not—” She swallows hard and shakes her head. “I wasn’t going to call it a mistake.”
My shoulders relax. Good. Because it wasn’t one. “Then what’s wrong?” She’s acting cagey, already trying to put up walls between us.
Cecilia bites her lip and takes a step away.
My hand falls back to my side. “We need to set boundaries,” she says.
“Things are already complicated between us. We need to create guidelines for whatever this is going to be. We’re not …
together, right? I’m not ready for that, and you said no strings. ”
My jaw tightens. I don’t want there to be any boundaries between us, but I get what she’s saying. This is supposed to be casual, even though nothing about what I feel for this woman is casual in the least.
“Alright. Lay them on me.” If Cecilia needs to establish a few rules, so be it. I’ll agree to damn near anything if it means I can have her.
Relief flickers across her face. She expected me to be difficult about this, but see? I’m full of surprises today.
“I don’t think we should do sleepovers.”
That’s dumb. We should absolutely do sleepovers. Then I can fuck her morning, noon, and night, but it’s fine. I’ll work them in later. I can be patient.
Sort of.
Well, I can try.
“Okay. What else?”
She licks her lips. “No cuddling.”
Also dumb, but fine.
For now.
“Alright. Any other rules I should be aware of?”
Cecilia takes a deep breath, and I can see the nerves running through her like a live wire. She’s anxious about laying down these rules and she’s waiting for me to reject them.
There’s an intriguing mix of vulnerability and determination in her eyes.
I like seeing this side of her. She’s more animated. More alive.
“Um ...” She hesitates, searching for the words. “I think we should keep this between us. No telling anyone that we’re …” She waves toward the counter. “You know.”
It’s not an unreasonable request, but it still stings a little. I want everyone to know that she’s mine, even if only in private, but I’ll play along.
“That means no holding hands. No PDA. Our relationship outside of this, when we’re on campus, is the same that it has been.”
“I won’t lie to my roommates. I won’t offer up any information unless they ask about you, but if they do ask, I’m not going to lie about what we’re doing.”
Her lips purse, but I’m not finished. “And when you’re here, I’m not going to sneak around and hide you.
We’re both adults,” I respond, my voice steady, though I can’t help the pang of disappointment knowing she’d prefer no one know.
“But outside of my place, we’ll keep things on the down low. Agreed?”
She chews on her bottom lip, a nervous habit that I find inexplicably sexy. “I can live with that.”
Good.
“Anything else?”
She nods. “Yeah. Umm… Let’s agree to not get too...attached. Emotionally, you know? This is purely physical, right? We both know what we’re getting into here.”
Her words hit me like a cold shower, and it’s hard to hide the hurt that flickers across my face. I want all of her—body, heart, and soul—but I’ll settle for what I can get. This was my suggestion, after all, so yeah, no getting emotionally attached. Noted.
“Yeah, of course,” I reply, my voice devoid of any emotion, even though her words are a punch in the gut. “I don’t like dealing with cleat chasers during the season. They’re annoying as shit, but you know,” I shrug. “I’m no saint, and I’m not looking to be celibate. So, this is a win-win.”
Cecilia glances at me, her eyes searching mine as if she’s trying to read into my words.
“So you’re okay with all of this?” she asks, her vulnerability peeking through.
I put on my best poker face and offer her a carefree smile. “Absolutely. These are your rules, and I’ll respect them.” She sighs, and I can see the tension ease from her shoulders. “But I have one of my own.”
“You do?” Her expression turns from relieved to cautious.
Reaching out to cup her cheek, my thumb brushes over her lips. I need her to know how serious I am about my rule because this one, for me, is non-negotiable.
“I don’t share when I’m with a woman. When I’m fucking her.
” Her cheeks heat at my vulgar words. “We’re not in a relationship.
I don’t own you.” Yet. We'll get to that. “But while we’re messing around,” I press my thumb against the seam of her lips, and her mouth parts for me.
I press inside. “I own this mouth.” With my other hand, I cup her core.
“I own this pussy.” Her breath hitches, and want fills her eyes, even as she tries to hide it.
I drag my finger free from her lips and grip both her hips, pulling her into mine.
“This shit between us, it’s exclusive. Understand?”
She swallows hard but nods.
Good. I’ll play by her rules, but I’m not going to stop pursuing her. She’s welcome to set up as many boundaries and rules as she likes. One by one, when she’s least expecting it, I’ll tear them all down.