Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CASPIAN
As I gaze down at the woman my beast just mated, a stranglehold of terror grips my heart.
I’m scared that when she wakes up she’s going to reject me before we can even get started.
This was only supposed to be a bit of fun to distract her from take-off, but when she insisted I change form, my beast took over.
I fought him the whole time, begging him not to do this, not to take away her choice, but he pushed me too far back, telling me this woman was perfect for us and he wasn't going to let her get away.
He was taking the matter out of our hands by doing the thing I couldn't make myself do—take away her choice.
But the asshole didn't just give her the mating bite; he also implanted her with our eggs. Lila is going to wake up mated and pregnant, and she’s going to hate me.
I feel a tear slide down my cheek as I push her sweat-drenched hair back from her face.
Her body is completely wrung out by what we did to it, but she just kept begging for more.
He’s not wrong about her being perfect for us, but women don't like it when the choice is taken out of their hands. That’s a universal fact no matter what their species, and all I can feel right now is shame.
I don’t get to feel the satisfaction that my beast says I should, nor do I get to be excited about the eggs she’s holding.
What should be one of the best moments of my life is so far from that, I don’t know what to do.
I had been an asshole to her from the start, afraid of getting looks of horror from the practically human woman the bosses had brought aboard—their heir.
But she had taken everything I threw at her and given it back without flinching.
Despite that, I was stunned when I felt her mark appear on my shoulder.
She was as attracted to me as I was to her, and I wasn’t going to allow that to go by unexplored.
I couldn’t. It’s been so long since I was more than a novelty.
Fuck, since I had even the chance to become more than that to someone.
How could I walk away from the chance for someone to truly want me?
When Dylan cornered me before take-off and warned me away from her, I argued with my best friend for the first time in a long time.
He tried to tell me she was fragile and over her head and that she didn't know what she was doing.
Didn't realize the consequences of her actions. I told him to fuck off, like the asshole I am. Finally, I’d found a woman who was interested in me, and she was hot and feisty, and I was going to get to know her better.
He’s going to cook me when he finds out I mated and impregnated her all without her agreement. That hot and cold act of his as far as Lila is concerned might very well spell out danger for her too. I have fucked up on so many levels.
Oh god, not to mention her grandpas are going to kill me. If she doesn’t first.
Reaching into the impaction gel, I take out the tablet and hit the clean cycle on the pod.
Warm gel flushes over our bodies and the surfaces around us, leaving us clean and refreshed.
Maybe she’ll be in a better mood when she doesn’t wake up looking like a crime scene under a blacklight.
Changing into my other form in the hope that it won’t be as triggering when she discovers what my beast has done, I gather my mate into my arms and cradle her carefully against my chest, placing kisses all over her still-flushed cheeks.
She doesn’t stir, snuggling into my body instead.
Using the tablet, I press another button.
The gel seeps up and over us, leaving only our heads exposed, and then it warms to a comfortable temperature.
I close my eyes, feeling content for the first time in a long time, with my mate wrapped in my arms. I only hope it won’t be the last time it happens.
Looking down, I can see our mating mark on her shoulder now.
Both our marks have combined and are settled into her skin, not like the other two marks next to it which still have the flatness of a painted tattoo.
It’s a pentagram with an eye in the middle, and the other one is a series of cogs sitting on top of a staff with two snakes twined around it.
Dylan had thrown in my face that she had not one, but three marks, but it hadn't bothered me. I knew it was a possibility, and from what I know of Lila, she seems to have a big heart. I’m sure she’s capable of equally loving as many of us as she takes.
I breathe in her scent, which is now a mix of both of ours, and pray to the universe that this woman forgives my beast and is willing to make a go of this.
If she doesn't, I will have to leave the circus. There’s no way I could be around her every day, knowing she's mine but not being able to touch her.
My beast nearly forces himself forward again at the notion that I might be willing to keep him away from our babies, but I manage to win this time, tugging Lila closer and letting myself focus on nothing but the warmth of her in my arms.
Closing my eyes, I allow myself to drift off to sleep, taking this stolen moment in time to enjoy this feeling because it could shatter at any moment.
LILA
As I wake from the deepest sleep I’ve had in weeks, I notice my body aches all over.
A bone-deep ache that I know has come from really, really good sex.
The warm arms around me make me feel cherished, and I smile to myself as I snuggle deeper into them.
It’s nice to feel wanted, even if only on a superficial level.
Damn, that was some sex session. Not only did he completely distract me from what was happening, Caspian rocked my fucking world, and I’m not sure I could go back to normal vanilla sex after that.
I mean, seriously, he made my books come to life.
The first round was better than any I’d had before, but when he got all freaky? Fucking sign me up for more of that.
He shifts in his sleep, and I notice that his legs are now back to normal, all tangled up with mine.
There isn't a part of our bodies that isn’t touching, and I can feel his thick cock hard against me.
I should give him a treat to wake him to say thanks for working me over so well.
Realizing I’m too tightly clenched against him to move, I start to place kisses against his chest until a glint of silver catches my eye, and my mouth zeros in on one of his sexy as fuck nipple rings.
Licking the hard bud, I take the ring into my mouth and worry it gently with my tongue, using my teeth to scrape at the skin around it.
Caspian shifts in his sleep, thrusting his cock into my hip as a small moan escapes his mouth.
When his arms loosen, I smile to myself and wiggle my way down his body, licking and sucking and placing love bites all over his body.
With that gorgeously alien skin of his, the marks show up as bright purple rather than red.
They look so pretty that when I get to his hip bone, I get the urge to really mark him.
Not really sure what that’s all about, but let’s go for it.
He grunts when my teeth clamp down, and a hand brushes through my hair, grabbing hold of some strands.
Running my tongue across the imprint I’ve left, I drop lower until I’m face to face with his sucker-covered cock.
The suckers ripple with movement. Again, I take it into my mouth, loving how the suckers tickle my tongue and cheeks as they pulse in and out.
I suck and lick and moan my enjoyment, feeling entirely unashamed.
Fuck me, it’s like his cock is laced with ecstasy.
My pussy instantly starts to drip, and I’m panting to be filled.
Caspian must be exhausted because when I climb back up his body and line myself up with his cock, he only moans.
This is like the third time we’ve had sex, but I still can’t get enough.
Thank goodness for his natural lubrication, otherwise I would have to be investing in a jumbo-sized container of it, though maybe a carton of cranberry juice might not be a bad idea.
Enough, Lila. Dick first, UTI prevention later.
Feeling naughty, I lower myself down his thick dick, gasping as I watch it disappear into my pussy.
Fuck me, that’s hot. When I’m flush with his pelvis, I lean forward, bracing my palms on either side of his head so the suckers surrounding the base can work my clit while I gently ride him.
Still watching it all, I frown when I notice my belly.
My normally flat stomach looks like I've just eaten a huge meal. I must be getting my period soon because it’s slightly bloated.
But the suckers soon distract me, and I throw my head back as I rock myself up and down on my lover's cock.
“Fuck me, princess, you look like a goddess. You’re beautiful and amazing.” Caspian’s voice is filled with reverence as I work myself over. “Please don't hate me,” he whispers as he sits up and takes one of my nipples into his mouth, thrusting upward at the same time.
“Fuck me hard,” I shout, ready to lose myself in him again now that he’s awake.
I’m a sweaty panting mess by the time we both orgasm in sync, but when I lean down to take his mouth with mine, he pulls out of me and rolls away.
Hurt lashes at my heart, and I’m making no effort to hide it.
It might end up being awkward as fuck, but the kraken just came inside me for the third time.
He can explain himself no matter how damn uncomfortable it is.
“Oh, baby, please don’t look like that. I want nothing more than to kiss and hold you tight now and forever.
I know it’s soon and we barely know each other, but I’m hoping that you will grow to love me like I think I could love you. ”