New Level
“New day, new gym. You’ve got this.” I kept repeating the mantra, trying to hype myself up to go into said gym.
I hadn’t lived in Mapplewood for over ten years, and it felt the same yet so vastly different.
I had changed and lost a lot. Maplewood had also changed too; so much was added to what used to be a smaller town, and now it seemed the traffic and the people were never-ending.
Hopefully, the growth would work in my favor, though.
Moving back to Maplewood, Tennessee, at the time, felt like the right choice.
Even if it was also extremely nerve-wracking.
For the last decade, I lived in Knoxville, Tennessee, getting my degree in IT, and eventually working day and night as I became a top software engineer at the company I worked at.
When I left Maplewood, I felt like I needed to get out of this town because of everything that happened with my family.
Except that the longer I lived there, the more I started to hate living in the city. It was too loud and crowded, but somehow I simultaneously felt lonely. A serious relationship wasn’t on the front burner either because making sure I kept my scholarships and securing a job were the priorities.
Sure, there were the occasional hookups, but it always seemed surface-level at best, and nothing ever lasted. Most of the time, it was because I was too scared to let anyone in. Too scared I’d lose even more.
So, I did what any logical person would do. I started applying to places in my hometown, looked around for a new place to move into, and put in my two-week notice at work.
Totally logical and thought out.
I walked into the gym and looked around, trying to scope it out and to get a feel for it; to see where everything was.
Today was going to be a basic upper body and chest day.
I was looking for the area I would need when my eyes locked with the most stunning woman I’d ever seen.
She had legs for days that were perfectly thick and sculpted; her curves were phenomenal, too.
If I wasn’t mistaken, I could see some kind of tattoo. Goddamn, she was gorgeous.
As quickly as I caught the two girls staring at me like I was a piece of meat for sale, they began moving clumsily around, acting like they weren’t doing anything out of the ordinary.
I couldn’t help but smile. It wasn’t often I caught girls checking me out, but it always did give me a nice ego boost.
I went and placed my stuff in the lockers, threw my headphones in, and started up my gym playlist. “Rise Above It” by I Prevail started to thump through my headphones, and I knew this was going to be a good workout.
I started with bicep curls, slowly increasing the weight after a set.
For a smaller gym, they had a pretty decent selection of free weights, which was always a plus.
Maybe it made me your average gym-bro, but I loved lifting.
It centered me, allowed me to focus, and have some control.
I wasn’t totally shredded by any means. I did have pretty great upper and lower body strength; my arms and legs had a decent amount of muscle packed on, but I didn’t have six-pack abs—shit, I didn’t even have a two-pack.
There was a stomach on me because you could pry my carbs from my cold, dead fingers.
I’d rather have some extra weight than give up glorious rolls and pizza.
The dumbbells and benches were in front of a large mirror-filled wall, so that I could see everyone behind me.
It also had different machines and areas surrounding it, like squat racks, and places to bench press.
That included the beautiful girl from when I walked in.
Against my better judgment, my gaze slid back over to her every few seconds.
Not wanting to make her uncomfortable, I cursed myself every time I caught myself doing it, but my god.
I had never seen a woman lift weights like she was doing right now.
She had her friend spotting her while she bench-pressed, but even I could tell from here she didn’t need that.
That weight was moving like nothing. Fuck me.
Most girls I knew from school and the city did yoga or pilates, and there was absolutely nothing wrong with that, don't get me wrong.
Everyone should enjoy the workouts that they do and feel good while doing them.
There was something about watching a woman lift heavy that did it for me.
It looked like she had thigh muscles that could—
NO Spence, stop thinking about a stranger you don’t know that way, damn it.
I shook my head and went back to my current set.
After I finished, I got up to stretch and drink some water, and damn it, I was a weak, weak man and couldn’t help it.
My eyes drifted back to the goddess I felt drawn to, except this time our eyes clashed.
It was as if all the air from my lungs had been ripped out.
She gently bit her bottom lip and looked away, and god, she was stunning the closer I was.
I could see now that she had a small, hooped nose ring, multiple piercings in her ears, freckles splattered all over her round face, and the prettiest full pink lips.
Is it weird to introduce myself? Would she even want me to? No, she wouldn’t want that. I can see it clearly now. I walk up and interrupt her workout with her friend, “Uhh, excuse me, I couldn’t help but check you out from across the gym and wanted to come introduce myself.”
No, absolutely not, I would not be that creepy guy.
Maybe I could catch her on the way out, or maybe we would both get here at the same time one day?
I sounded crazy, even to myself. Clearly, I needed to focus and take a cold shower.
I needed a clear head before I started my new job tomorrow, anyway.
I didn’t need a distraction, even if said distraction was insanely gorgeous.
I wanted to be the one to bite her bottom lip.
I needed to lock in and focus.
Finally wrapping my workout up at almost two hours, my upper body was thoroughly wrecked.
I could already feel the ache in my shoulders and biceps starting to set in.
I went ahead and stopped by the Tex-Mex restaurant by the gym to grab a burrito bowl, because I was still working on getting everything unpacked in the apartment, and I had zero groceries.
I always had the biggest appetite after lifting, like I could eat enough for a small family.
Once I got home, I took a quick shower and changed into clean sweats. Plopping on my bed, I flipped open my laptop and turned on Netflix while I ate. Thankfully, I downloaded some shows to watch offline during this transitional period.
After finishing up, I went and tossed the empty bowl into the box that was my makeshift trash can for the moment, until I could get to the store.
I made sure I had all I needed for the day laid out on the table for tomorrow.
Then, I hung my slacks, button-up, and tie on a hanger in the doorway.
Even though I was nervous, I knew this would be a good change for me.
I missed being able to hop online and game after a long day, or go out with friends for drinks after work.
I still tried to get to the gym, but even that had been only a couple of days a week because I was so exhausted and wanted to sleep all the time.
I was tired of that burnt-out feeling and fed up with feeling so alone.
I wanted something more than getting up, going to work, coming home, and going to bed.
I had worked hard enough early on that my skill set was valuable to most IT positions, but I needed a step back from all the hard work.
I was even willing to take a pay cut since I had enough saved up.
I was renting where I lived, and had nothing to tie me to Knoxville.
Now seemed like the best time for the major change.
My best friend Carson had originally offered to let me crash with him, but he and his family had already done so much for me that I couldn’t do that to him.
They were a big reason I took the leap and moved back.
I didn’t have the biggest support system, but the Adams had been beyond welcoming and helpful for most of my life.
Luckily, some newer apartments were available, and I was able to find something affordable pretty quickly.
I lay there and scrolled on my phone since the internet hadn’t gotten hooked up yet, and wouldn't till tomorrow afternoon.
My nerves kept my mind circling about everything.
The move back, my new job, was I making the right decision in all of this?
It felt like the right decision, but what if I was wrong?
I could feel my mind spiraling, catching onto all the “what-ifs.” I closed my apps and did some deep breathing to try to silence the storm brewing.
Eventually, it helped enough that I was able to fall into a deep sleep, hoping I would rest enough to start this new level tomorrow.