Chapter 6 #2
“So you’ll give me the stuff to sleep?”
David sat on a stool. “Tell me why your mind is racing. What do you see when you close your eyes?”
It was the one question Grant couldn’t answer. He simply couldn’t put words to the horror. So he shook his head. “Nothing, really. But I can’t seem to shut down and sleep. I really need to sleep.”
“You look awful.”
“So I hear.”
“I’ll give you a script for seven days of sleep medication. After that, though, you’re going to have to talk about what happened if you want to stop reliving it every minute you’re awake or asleep.”
David’s words struck at Grant’s deepest fear. That someday he might have to tell people… He might have to tell his family what really happened out there.
“Grant? What is it?”
“Nothing.” He shook off the unsettling thoughts.
“I’ll give you one of our samples for tonight since the pharmacy is already closed. You can fill the script in the morning. I want to see you back here a week from today. I’ll have the secretary call you in the morning to make an appointment.”
Grant extended a hand that David shook. “Thank you for this. I know things have been weird between you and our family since… Well, anyway. I appreciate it.”
“Happy to help. Do yourself a favor and unload on someone before it eats you alive.”
Startled by David’s insight, Grant nodded and left the room, clutching the sample box David had given him like the lifeline it was.
Tonight, he would sleep. Tonight, he would finally get some peace.
Tonight, he could forget for a little while anyway.
If he got some sleep, maybe tomorrow wouldn’t be so agonizing.
The McCarthys were lingering over dessert when Stephanie came in, looking flustered and frazzled. “Grant isn’t here?” she asked after taking a quick visual inventory of the family gathered around the dining room table.
“No, honey,” Linda said. “We assumed he was with you.”
“I haven’t seen him since this morning. I tried to call him to see if he was here, but he didn’t answer his phone. I don’t know where he is.”
Grace got up and went to Stephanie, putting an arm around her and bringing her to sit at the table. “I’m sure he’s fine,” she said.
“He’s not fine. He’d never miss being with you guys if he was fine.”
“Neither would Evan,” Grace said. “But at least he called to say he was tied up at the studio.”
“What’s Grant’s excuse?” Stephanie said. “He hasn’t worked since the accident.”
Adam watched the goings-on with an increasing sense of dismay. He glanced across the table to catch Maddie reaching for Mac’s hand.
All eyes seemed to land on Mac, as if the rest of the family was silently asking him what they should do.
Maddie squeezed his hand.
Mac stared at their joined hands, seeming to draw strength from his wife.
“It was tough out there,” he said so softly it was almost a whisper.
“We all went through our own personal hell, but we also had hours to wonder what’d become of each other.
It’s going to take some time. That’s all I can say. ”
Linda nodded and brushed away a tear.
“We have to let them do this their own way, as hard as it may be for us,” Mac said.
“You’re not running away or burying yourself in work, and you went through the same thing they did,” Janey said.
“That doesn’t mean it hasn’t been hard on me, too.”
Janey seemed taken aback by her brother’s unusually sharp tone. “I didn’t mean to imply otherwise.”
“Sorry, brat,” Mac said. “I shouldn’t snap at you, but it doesn’t help to have everyone watching our every move, waiting for us to need you. If we need you, we’ll tell you.”
“So I’m supposed to be fine with not knowing where he is?” Stephanie asked.
“I’ll go see if I can find him,” Adam said.
“Thanks, Adam,” Stephanie said.
“How about some dinner?” Linda asked Stephanie.
She shook her head. “Thanks, but I’m not hungry.”
“Try not to worry,” Grace said. “He probably forgot about dinner and went for a walk or something.”
“Yeah,” Steph said, “I’m sure that’s all it is.”
She said what she thought the family wanted to hear, but Adam could tell she didn’t believe it. He wondered if his parents could tell, too.
The others left a short time later, and Adam helped his mom clean up while his dad went down to check on the marina. Adam couldn’t help but notice she was unusually quiet.
“He’s fine, Mom.”
“No, he isn’t. And neither is Evan. Mac is trying to be strong for everyone else, but he’s not himself either. It’s difficult to pretend like everything is fine when it isn’t.”
“It’s like Mac said. It’ll take some time.”
“I’m wondering if we need to get a shrink over here to talk to them.”
“I’m sure they’d be all for that,” Adam said with a laugh.
“I called Uncle Kevin,” she said of Big Mac’s younger brother.
“Mom!”
“What? He’s gotten a lot of attention for his work with posttraumatic stress. I wanted his advice.”
Adam leaned against the counter and crossed his arms. “What did he say?”
“Why should I tell you? You think it’s a stupid idea.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“I had to do something! I can’t sit idly by and watch my kids suffer while they go on pretending nothing is wrong.”
“Tell me what he said.”
She seemed to sag as she, too, leaned against the counter. “Some of the same stuff Mac did. That we need to give them time and space to come to terms with what happened and how they feel about it. We need to let them go through it in their own way.”
“At what point do we intervene?”
“That was my question, too. He said to give it a few weeks, and if they don’t seem better, he’ll come out for a visit.”
“Did you tell Dad you called him?”
“It was his idea. He asked me to make the call because he can’t talk about it without crying.”
“He might need Kevin, too.”
“I thought the same thing.”
Adam reached for his mom and hugged her. “I know it’s very upsetting, but they’re strong guys with tons of support around them. I have to believe they’ll be okay. Eventually.”
“I hope you’re right. I’m worried about all of them, but Grant in particular.”
“I’m going to see if I can find him.”
“Thank you, honey. It would make me feel so much better to know where he is.”
“That’s why I’m here, Mom.” It wasn’t the only reason, but with all her other concerns, it was the only reason he was sharing with her. “Try not to worry, and don’t wait up.”
“Okay.”
He kissed her forehead and went to grab a jacket.
Long after Grant left the clinic, David hoped he’d done the right thing by giving him sleeping meds.
Clearly something big was on Grant’s mind, and adding sleep deprivation to the mix wasn’t helping.
He made a note to follow up with Grant in a few days to see if the medication had helped.
Maybe by then he’d be looking for someone impartial to talk to about whatever was keeping him up at night.
Victoria appeared at his office door. “Your not-so-secret admirer is here, bearing gifts.” This was said sotto voce with a teasing smile and a wink.
David would never admit to anyone, especially Victoria, who loved to tease him about it, that he’d begun to look forward to Daisy’s end-of-the-day visits to the clinic. Ever since he’d tended to her after her ex-boyfriend beat her up, she’d been extremely devoted to him. “I thought you left.”
“I met up with your friend in the parking lot and waited with her until you were done with Grant.”
“That was nice of you. Thanks.”
“You’re not leading her on, are you?” Victoria whispered.
“Of course not. We’re friends.”
“Just friends?”
Her questions were annoying him. “Yes.”
“Does she know that?” Victoria asked with an eyebrow raised in inquiry.
“Send her in.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Send her in, please.”
“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do in the exam rooms.”
David felt his face heat like an embarrassed schoolboy. “Victoria!” he said in a low growl.
“I’m going, I’m going!”
Rattled by Victoria’s insinuations—and how close to home they struck—he ran his fingers through his hair to straighten it after the long day at the clinic and stood to tuck in his shirttail. Why was he primping for her?
She came around the corner a minute later, her sweet smile leading the way as she proceeded hesitantly.
Her long blonde hair was pulled back from her face, and her big blue eyes were luminous and bright with excitement.
Even though her face still bore the yellowing bruises from Truck’s assault, she looked a little better every day.
He’d enjoyed watching her become less timid and more confident as she recovered from her injuries. After a few days of checking on her at home after work, David had stopped himself from going back again. She was on the mend and didn’t need to be checked every day.
Once he’d stopped going to her, however, she’d started coming to him.
He told himself it didn’t mean anything.
They’d struck up an unlikely friendship after the incident with her ex.
That’s all it was. Except that he’d come to look forward to talking with her, to hearing her opinions and insightful thoughts on whatever was on his mind.
“David? Are you okay?”
He realized he was staring at her and blinked—twice—to clear his muddled brain. “Yes, sorry. Come in. Have a seat.” It had taken some doing to get her to call him by his first name, and he was pleased she’d taken that step.
“Am I bothering you?”
He sat in the chair behind his desk. “Not at all. I was just catching up on some paperwork.” Gesturing to the stack of charts on his desk, he said, “It never ends.”
“I brought you some of the pot roast one of my friends made for me.”
David’s mouth watered as the smell reached him at the same moment the words pot roast registered in his brain. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“If you keep forgetting to eat, you won’t be much good to your patients.”
“You sound like my mother.”
Her soft peal of laughter made David feel ten feet tall. “Something tells me that’s not a compliment.”
“She likes to fuss over me, too.”
“Is that what I’m doing? Fussing over you?”
“I’m not sure. Are you?”