Chapter 12 #3
“It’s more of a risk for me than it would be for most people.”
“That’s true, but the alternative is to remain alone for the rest of your life, and I don’t think you want that either.”
“I’m sick of being alone, and I like how I feel when he’s around. It’s exciting.”
Sydney put down her glass and crossed the kitchen to hug Jenny. “That’s the most wonderful thing I’ve heard in a very long time. I’ve been so hoping you’d find someone special.”
“Don’t jinx me,” Jenny said, returning the embrace. “It’s still very new.”
Sydney released her but kept her hands on Jenny’s shoulders. “But there’s a connection. That doesn’t happen every day.”
“No, it doesn’t.” She looked up at Sydney. “Do you ever worry about something happening to Luke and having to go through the whole nightmare again?”
“I worried about that every day when we were first together, especially after the accident at the marina when he was hurt. I was a wreck for weeks after that. I obsessed about what could’ve happened.”
“How did you get past that?”
“Luke got me past it. He told me I was worrying needlessly, that in all the years he’s worked at the marina, that was the first time he’d ever been seriously injured or seen anyone else seriously injured.
He said his daily life isn’t particularly risky, and I replied that neither was Seth’s.
Over time he’s helped me to see that what happened to Seth and the kids was a terrible tragedy, but I have no particular reason to worry that it’ll happen again. ”
Jenny thought about what Syd had said and had to admit it made a lot of sense.
“It comes down to a choice, really,” Syd continued. “Do I miss out on the most wonderful second chance with Luke because I’m afraid to love and lose again? Or do I take the risk that everything might just be fine?”
“No regrets on choosing option B?”
“Not one. Luke has helped me to see that while Seth’s life is over, and my children’s lives are over, mine is not. You and I were both dealt a shitty hand, but we honor the people we lost by loving again. At least that’s what I believe.”
“That’s a lovely thing to believe. The last time I talked to Toby, after the plane hit the building and he knew what was going to happen…
He told me he wanted me to be happy, that my happiness was the most important thing in the world to him.
Imagine… He was aware that he was probably going to die, and all he was thinking about was me. ”
“He knew what you most needed to hear, and he knew that when the time came to truly move forward, those words would mean everything to you.”
Jenny brushed at the tears that fell despite her desire to get through this without them. She’d cried more than enough over the last twelve years. You’d think she’d be all cried out by now.
“For what it’s worth, I think you’ll feel better after you tell Alex about Toby. It’s weighing you down at a time when you should be feeling happy at having found someone you want to be with. Tell him sooner rather than later so you can put the past where it belongs and start to enjoy the future.”
“That’s very good advice.”
“He works for himself, doesn’t he?”
“Yes.”
“Do you have his number?”
Jenny nodded. She’d programmed it into her phone after he called her last night.
“Text him and ask him where he’s working and whether he might be interested in a lunch delivery.”
“I can’t bother him in the middle of his workday.”
“Why not?”
Jenny couldn’t think of any good reason why not.
Sydney’s smug smile made her laugh. “Get your phone before you lose your nerve.”
Still not convinced this was a good idea, she retrieved the phone from her purse.
“Ready to take dictation?” Syd asked.
“Are you always this bossy?”
“Only when it serves a good purpose. Get the text ready.”
Jenny typed his name into the text screen. “It’s ready.”
“Ask him if he’s interested in a lunch delivery.”
Shaking her head, Jenny sighed. Any interest in a lunch delivery?
Her phone chimed almost immediately in response. I’m already starving so that sounds awesome. I’m working at the Chesterfield estate today. You know where that is?
I know where it is. Any special requests?
Surprise me.
Ok. See you soon.
Can’t wait.
Sydney was standing next to Jenny, reading the texts as they were sent and received. “I think I might be in love with this guy, too.”
“Hands off. You’ve got your own hot guy to love.”
“Yes, I do, and Alex is all yours.” She gave Jenny a tight one-armed hug. “I’m so happy this is happening for you.”
“Stop jinxing me.”
Sydney laughed. “Thanks for telling me about him.”
“Thanks for listening. I’ve been dying to tell someone for days now.”
“You should invite him to the shower on Saturday. We’re inviting the guys to pay them back for all the times they’ve crashed girls’ night out. We figured making them attend a sex-toy-and-lingerie party was the very least of what they deserve.”
“Oh my God, I love that! But I don’t know if I’m ready to expose Alex to a sex-toy party and our crowd at the same time.”
“It’ll be a good test,” Sydney said with a smirk.
“I’ll think about it.” She gave her friend a hug. “Thank you so much for listening.”
“Any time. You and I share an unfortunate bond, so I’m glad you came to me.”
“There was no one else I could’ve gone to. I knew you’d tell me exactly what to do.”
“Of course I want to hear every detail of how lunch goes.” Sydney walked her to the door. “It’ll be hard to tell him the story, but once you do, you’ll feel better. I promise.”
“I hope you’re right.”
“I’m always right. Ask Luke.”
“I’ll do that,” Jenny said on her way out the door.
“Next time I see him.” Sydney’s laughter followed her down the sidewalk.
Bolstered by her friend’s support, Jenny drove into town and picked up sandwiches, drinks, chips, cookies and fruit at the grocery store.
In deference to the heat, she also got him two bottles of water and a bag of ice to keep everything cold.
Giddy with excitement at the thought of seeing him, she set off for the Chesterfield estate, determined to tell him what he needed to know about her and then get back to enjoying what was happening between them.