Chapter 18
Chloe went through the motions of running the fundraiser while ignoring the persistent aching in her hips, knees and ankles from too much time on her feet—the last three hours in heels she had no business wearing anymore.
Everyone in attendance wanted to talk to her about something, or so it seemed. The only one she wanted to talk to was the dark-haired man in the back of the room who watched her intently even as he talked and laughed with various family members and friends.
Every time her gaze collided with his, her body reacted the same way it did when he touched her. How did he do that with merely a look? And what was she doing agreeing to spend the night with him? She had no idea, but she could no longer bear to resist the overpowering attraction.
Other women did one-night stands all the time. Why couldn’t she?
Even as she had the thought, she knew that one night would never be enough. But it was all she had to offer.
Owen returned to the stage and, propped on a stool, began strumming his guitar.
“I used to live a vagabond life, traveling from one gig to another. Until I met the stunningly beautiful Laura McCarthy and wanted to put down roots for the first time ever, right here in this hotel my grandparents ran for fifty years. This is ‘Better Together’ by Jack Johnson, for my wife, Laura, the mother of my three beautiful children and the love of my life. I am so much better when we’re together, baby. ”
With a hand over her heart, Laura pretended to swoon and then blew a kiss to her adorable husband. Chloe could only imagine what it must be like to have such a connection with a man. She’d never come close to what Laura had with Owen.
“You promised me a dance.”
Finn’s breath against her ear sent goose bumps skittering down her arms and made her nipples tighten.
“So I did.”
He led her to the dance floor, drew her into his arms, and she wrapped hers around his waist, inside the blazer.
They were making a rather public declaration that would be the talk of Gansett Island, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. Not when she had him and the delicious scent of him to focus on.
“I like this song.” She tried to ignore her out-of-control hormones. “I’ve never heard it.”
“I like it, too. How long do you have to stay?” His gruffly stated question had her hormones on full alert.
“I can leave any time now. The silent auction announcement was my last official duty.”
“You want to go?”
“Right now?”
“I’m dying to be alone with you.”
No man had ever said anything remotely like that to her, and it was all she could do to continue to breathe.
“After this song.”
“Not sure I can wait that long.” A full-body shiver rattled her and drew a tortured groan from him. “Let’s go.”
“Don’t you have to say goodbye to your family?”
“If I do that, we’ll be here another hour, and that’s not an option.
It’s okay. They won’t care.” He took a gentle hold of her hand, always mindful of her swollen knuckles, and led her out of Stephanie’s.
They were on their way to a clean escape when Riley emerged from the men’s room in the lobby and spotted them.
“Leaving so soon, kids?”
Finn grimaced. “Chloe has to work early.”
“Is that your story, and you’re sticking to it?”
“Bye, Riley.” Placing his hand on her lower back, he guided Chloe out the hotel’s front door, placing his coat over her shoulders once again.
“Thank you. I forgot to bring a sweater.”
“Did I tell you how incredible you look tonight?”
Chloe’s face flushed with heat. “You might’ve mentioned something about that earlier.”
“Well, it bears repeating.”
“Thank you.”
“It’s really not fair,” he said.
“What isn’t?”
“You being so stunningly beautiful when I’m trying to honor your wishes and keep my distance.” He put his arm around her shoulders and matched his stride to her much slower one. “You’ve got me turned upside down and inside out, Chloe.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to do that to you.”
“I’ve never been in a situation like this one before.”
“What’s different about it?”
“Everything is different. Everything.” In the parking lot, he steered her toward his truck.
“I’ll bring you back to get your car in the morning.
” He opened the passenger door, helped her in and studied her in that intent, all-consuming way of his.
Leaning in, he said, “The way I want you is different. The way I think about you is different. The way I feel when I’m with you is different.
Even the way I feel when I’m not with you is different. ”
Chloe’s heart beat so fast, she feared it might burst from her chest. She raised a hand, placed it on his face and drew him into a kiss.
The needy sound that came from the back of his throat was like a shot of gas on the already out-of-control wildfire that burned between them.
Their kiss escalated so quickly, she forgot where she was or that anyone might see them kissing.
She turned her head to break the kiss. “It’s different for me, too. ”
He took a shuddering deep breath. “Let’s go.”
As he drove them to her house, he reached across the center console, palm up, inviting her to hold his hand.
Chloe appreciated that he did that, rather than taking hold of her sore hand and hurting her.
She rested hers on top of his, palm to palm, which was somehow more erotic than full-on sex with other men had been.
This man was different. She wanted to trust him with the truth of her diagnosis but wouldn’t because she didn’t feel comfortable telling anyone, even him. Protecting her business was her top priority. She couldn’t afford to take any risks that would endanger the flimsy security net beneath her.
If her condition got to the point where she couldn’t work at all, she would have to apply for disability.
And why was she falling into that rabbit hole when she was headed home to spend the night with the sexiest man in the universe? She had far better things to do tonight than dread her uncertain future.
“You okay?” he asked after a long silence.
“Uh-huh.”
“If you’ve changed your mind about tonight, it’s okay to say so.”
“I haven’t.”
“Oh good,” he said, exhaling dramatically.
She rubbed her hand against his. “Does that mean you haven’t changed your mind either?”
“Um, no. I haven’t changed my mind.”
Chloe laughed at his quick reply.
He looked over at her. “I like that.”
“What?”
“The sound of your laughter. It makes me happy to hear it.”
“I haven’t had a lot to laugh about lately. Thanks for giving me reason to.”
After another period of silence, he said, “You know… I’ve been told I’m a pretty good listener. If you want to talk about whatever’s weighing on you, I’m right here.”
God, she was tempted. It would be so easy to spill her guts to the sweet, sexy guy who made it so easy to trust him.
He wouldn’t tell anyone. She knew that for sure, but she didn’t want him to know either.
She didn’t want his pity or even his empathy, and she sure as hell didn’t want him feeling obligated to her in any way.
“That’s very sweet of you, but it’s the last thing in the world I want to talk about. ”
“The offer is on the table. No expiration date.”
“Thank you.” Crushing disappointment overtook Chloe as she realized that not only was he the sexiest man she’d ever met, but that he’d also make one hell of a friend. She wanted him in every way she could have him—as a lover, a friend, a confidant and a partner.
But the persistent ache in her hands and joints was a reminder of why she couldn’t go there with him.
He could have anyone. Chloe couldn’t bear the idea of making her problems his problems. She shouldn’t even be taking him home with her and cursed the weakness that had led to their plans for the evening.
She couldn’t have him long term, but she could have him tonight, and with everything else so tentative, she planned to fully enjoy this one night with him. A nagging worry crept into her mind… What did he think would happen after they spent tonight together?
“Finn…”
“Hmm?”
“You know this is only tonight, right?”
He didn’t say anything at first, making her wonder what he was thinking.
“I don’t understand why it has to be that way, Chloe. There’s something between us. You feel it every bit as much as I do.”
“I’m not denying that. It’s just that there are things…”
“What things? There’s nothing you could tell me that would make me not want this or you. Nothing.”
Her laugh had a bitter edge to it. That wasn’t true. He was twenty-seven years old with his entire life ahead of him. The last thing he needed was to be saddled with what was ahead for her.
“Make me understand, Chloe.” He gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “I have never once felt for any woman what I do for you, and I barely know you. When I tell you there’s nothing you could say that would change that for me, I mean it. I truly mean it.”
“I know you do.”
“And still you won’t tell me.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to. It’s just…
” She was still coming to grips with it herself and had no idea how to bring other people into it.
Perhaps it was time to take David’s advice and seek out professional help in dealing with her diagnosis, because she was doing a piss-poor job of dealing with it on her own.
If only the island’s shrink wasn’t Finn’s father.
However, she was becoming desperate enough for some coping skills that she might have to reach out to Dr. McCarthy.
Doctor-patient confidentiality would force him to keep her secrets, even if his own son was involved.
“I’m not able to talk about it. I’m just not. ”
He sighed. “Okay.”
“I’m sorry that it can’t be more, and I’ll understand if you’d rather not hang out tonight.”
“Unless you’re sending me away, I’m staying.”
“I’m not sending you away.”