Chapter Four #2
She gave him a soft smile. “When I first heard about it, I wasn’t sure.
But I know you. You’re not the type to misinterpret something as important as this.
You’re careful. Wary. Understandably, after all you’ve been through.
” She patted his hand. “I believe you. Now all we have to do is figure out what’s happening to him so we can fix it. ”
A heavy weight of anguish lifted off his chest. Cassiel would back him up.
“Thanks, Cass. I’ll give him a call later, see if I can set up a time to meet.”
She nodded. “Good. I don’t think I need to remind you, but just in case. As long as he’s not responding to you as his mate, don’t bring up the subject.”
As much as he hated having to hold back when the mating pull toward Tanner was so strong, it was the right call.
“I know.” Ronen nodded. “I’ll be careful. I won’t mention our fated bond until we have some answers and the time is right."
“How are you handling it?” Cassiel asked, her voice softening. “The pull must be intense for you.”
Ronen gripped the edge of the table, focusing on the solid feel of oak beneath his fingers to anchor himself. “It is. But I’ve waited centuries for him. I can endure a little longer.”
Cassiel yawned, stretching her arms above her head. “I’ll contact Michael. You should get some rest before you see Tanner. You look like hell warmed over.”
Ronen grunted in acknowledgment. “Yeah, I bet.”
They both rose and made their way to their respective guest rooms. Once he’d closed the door to the bedroom behind him, he dropped onto the edge of the bed.
Rest.
As exhausted as he was, he doubted he’d get much sleep. More than likely, he’d be worrying about Tanner and staying on high alert, just in case his mate found himself in danger again.
Ronen swallowed hard. No way was he going to lose his sweet angel. Not now, not ever.
Tanner stood motionless under the shower’s cascade, letting the hot water pound against his shoulders and spine.
Only now, hours after his shift had ended, did the full impact of his tumble the night before register in his aching body.
As usual, his head was also pounding, but a new sensation had been added to the mix.
Overwhelming desire and relentless nausea.
He’d barely been able to hold it together to finish his shift.
As it was, the second he made it back to the dorm, he’d raced to the bathroom, jacked off, then vomited.
Neither action had relieved his anguish.
Not only couldn’t he brush off the troubling symptoms he was experiencing, but he’d also begun to wonder if he should take a semester off and put in for a leave of absence at work so he could get help.
The thought of telling his supervisor he couldn’t continue working plunged him into a fresh wave of dread. Something was wrong at work. All the people in that facility were off somehow. They had too much knowledge, too much power, and they weren’t sharing where it came from.
He’d begun to notice small oddities in their behavior that sent warning signals through his body.
The way they sometimes stared at nothing for seconds at a time.
The hushed conversations that stopped when he approached.
The locked rooms he wasn’t allowed to enter, despite having top-level clearance.
He’d also started wondering why the Deputy Secretary of War was there.
At first, seeing the government official lent credence to the idea that this was a deep-state organization monitoring foreign powers.
His job had entailed breaking into sensitive data in other countries and inserting code to capture information.
But no other US official, at any level, had ever entered the compound. At least, none that he was aware of. Initially, he’d assumed that her presence was a natural part of the hierarchy. However, he was beginning to wonder if there was something more sinister at play.
And now there was Ronen.
Tanner shut off the water and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. The steam-fogged mirror revealed only a blurry outline of himself, which seemed fitting. He felt disconnected from his own body.
Ronen. Even thinking the name sent a jolt through him—half attraction, half revulsion. It made about as much sense as everything else in his bizarre life did right now.
The gorgeous man seemed like both a lifeline and a threat. He couldn’t reconcile the warring impulses that surged through him whenever he pictured Ronen’s handsome face and intense gray eyes. His body craved the man’s touch even as his mind screamed danger.
Tanner wiped a section of the mirror clear and stared at his reflection.
Dark circles shadowed his eyes, and his skin appeared paler than usual.
Was he imagining it, or were his normally hazel eyes a shade darker than they’d been a week ago?
He leaned closer, examining the flecks of green in his irises.
Definitely darker.
He pulled on a fresh T-shirt and sweatpants, gathered his towel and grooming kit, then made his way back to his room.
After collapsing on the bed, he closed his eyes, hoping without hope that a few hours of sleep would make everything a little better.
He’d decide what to do about work and school then.
Tanner punched his pillow, attempting to get it into the perfect shape that would encourage instant sleep.
After failing at that task, he kicked his feet to make his blanket behave so it wouldn't trap his toes.
He hated trapped toes. But after tossing and turning for a few minutes, he reluctantly opened his eyes again, groaning in frustration.
His phone sat on the charger next to his bed, Ronen’s number already programmed in. His fingers itched to call him, to hear that deep, rumbling voice again. What would he even say? ‘Hey, I think I'm going crazy, and by the way, I also can’t stop thinking about you’?
The phone vibrated suddenly, making him jump. With trembling fingers, Tanner picked it up. His heart raced as he swiped to answer. He sucked in a deep breath.
“Hello?” He winced at the way he’d croaked out the one word.
“Tanner? It’s Ronen.”
The low, sexy tone sent warmth spreading through his chest even as his stomach clenched with that strange, conflicting revulsion.
However, his overriding compulsion was to find out what the fuck was happening to him.
Given that his strong reaction to being around Ronen was part of his dilemma, he figured he’d start there.
“Hey,” Tanner said, his tension easing. “I didn't expect to hear from you so soon.”
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything. I only wanted to make sure you were doing okay. That was a traumatic experience you went through.”
Ronen’s voice was as orgasmic now as it was the night before. Nausea or no nausea, he wanted to see him again. After all, he felt like shit all the time anyway. Why not at least get something good out of it?
“Is that the only reason you called?” After spending most of his life with his head buried in computers, he had zero game.
A low chuckle sounded on the line before Ronen replied. “Well, no. If it’s convenient, I want to take you up on your offer. Would dinner tonight work?”
For a moment, one that passed so quickly he almost didn’t notice, his head stopped throbbing.
He almost blurted out his triumph, but the drumming returned as if mocking him.
Of course, Ronen wouldn’t have understood why he was raving about a headache, so there was that.
But Ronen made him want to unload all his troubles, to share everything that worried him.
Doesn’t sound too romantic, though.
“Hey,” Ronen’s voice interrupted his thoughts, “If you’ve changed your mind, I…I understand.”
Tanner shot up to a sitting position. “No!” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to yell. I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep, and I…” Should shut up. Definitely shut up. “But I’d love to get dinner. I’m off work the next couple of days, so I wouldn’t have to rush off.”
Thankfully. It was the only reason he wasn’t coming completely unglued. He had time before making any final decisions about leaving his job.
“Wonderful. I can pick you up if that’s all right. Or, if you’re not comfortable with that, we can meet somewhere.”
Tanner almost said they could meet somewhere but paused. Ever since he began working at Nexus Solutions, he hadn’t felt safe. The realization startled him. He hadn’t connected those dots at all. The incident the night before hadn’t exactly helped his outlook, either.
“Actually, if it’s not too much of a hassle, would you mind picking me up? I can meet you in the guest parking lot so you don’t have to go all the way across campus to my dorm.”
“It’s not a hassle at all. Just tell me where and when.”
Tanner let out a long breath. This was the first time he’d felt human in weeks. He drew his eyebrows together. That was an odd thought. He shook it off, so he didn’t leave Ronen hanging.
“Cool. I’m still a little freaked out after what happened last night. I thought about calling the police, but at this point, it seems pretty useless. What would I say? No description, no idea where the guy went.”
“I won’t let anything happen to you.”
Ronen said it with an assuredness that surprised him. How could Ronen possibly make such a promise? But his headache was coming back with a vengeance, and he was so tired, he could barely think straight.
After explaining which lot Ronen should use on campus and deciding on when to meet, they said their goodbyes.
Tanner checked the time on his cell. It was a little after eight, so he’d have several hours to sleep before getting ready to meet Ronen.
His roommate had a full class schedule and a chess club meeting later, so he wouldn’t have to worry about being disturbed.
As he lay back on his pillow, the shape perfect, his toes free, and a vision of Ronen in his mind, he finally drifted off to sleep.