Chapter 8
8
A mber blinked her eyes open. Her lids felt heavy from a night of purging emotions she had no desire to feel.
Garth’s hot breath tickled her shoulder. His knees pushed up against her legs. His hand rested on her hip.
She wanted to hate him. Resent him for what he’d force her to face.
Crying in general made her feel weak. Doing it in front of people made her feel powerless. She’d been raised to be strong. To be independent. To be the kind of woman who didn’t need a man to take care of any of her needs. Asking for help hadn’t been easy. Her parents had taught her that while it was okay to seek aid when necessary, it should be after all other avenues were exhausted.
They wanted their only daughter to make it in a man’s world, and she had. She needed no one to survive. To live. To be happy. She got all that from herself and she was damn proud of her accomplishments.
She squeezed her eyes closed and sucked in a deep breath.
Once you’ve figured out who you are, a partner will find you. And it will be a partner who will understand you. Will compliment you, like your father has done with me. He supports me. He listens to me. He knows me better than anyone. It’s often hard to explain, but it’s why Dad and I have been so hard on you. We don’t want you to go through life thinking you need a man, but we don’t want you to think you shouldn’t have one either. It all comes back to equality in a partnership and that’s harder for a woman when she doesn’t know herself and for a man when he doesn’t see that.
She opened her eyes and slipped from the bed as quietly as she could.
Garth saw her and he did understand who she was, but he’d pushed her hard last night. Unfortunately, it was exactly what she needed. While she’d waited for him to return from the Aegis Network, she’d been spiraling out of control. Her emotions were all over the map and the only thing that would stop her was going down the rabbit hole of speaking out. Of sending scathing emails to anyone and everyone involved in her brother’s case. To make a menace of herself because she needed them to reopen the case.
But she’d promised Garth she wouldn’t.
So the next best thing was to drown herself in Garth’s body.
That hadn’t gone as planned.
She snagged her robe and made her way to the bathroom. Reaching inside the shower, she turned on the water and waited for the right temperature. Shedding her clothing, she stepped under the water and let it coat her body. She pressed her hands against the cold tiles and let the spray coat her skin.
Garth was right about so many things that she couldn’t avoid anymore. But how could she straddle these emotions and not go insane at the same time?
The sound of the shower curtain being pulled back startled her. She turned.
“How are you feeling?” Garth asked. His thumbs fanned across her cheeks.
“Drained,” she admitted.
“I’m not surprised.” He leaned in and brushed his mouth over hers.
“I do want to talk about what your boss had to say.”
“After we shower and over a bowl of cereal and some coffee.” He ran his hand down her neck and over her breast, grazing her nipple, giving it a good, hard pinch.
“Now who’s using sex to?—”
He pressed his finger over her lips. “No, I’m not. I woke up, heard the shower, and realized the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met was naked and it gave me ideas. Besides, morning sex is the best.” He dotted kisses down her neck, across her chest, and took her nipple into his mouth.
Clutching his head, she arched her back and moaned.
“I can stop if you want me to.”
“God, no.”
He moved to the other nipple, while his hand smoothed down her belly, easing between her legs.
She gasped as he gently ran his index finger over her clit. He repeated the motion before diving inside with a powerful stroke.
Gripping his shoulders, she dug her nails into his flesh. Water beaded across his skin like lava rolling down the mountainside.
He moved lower, his lips brushing against her abdomen, finally reaching the apex of her thighs. He spread her legs wider, giving himself full access.
His tongue made slow, teasing circles around her clit, making her whimper with pleasure.
His fingers continued to explore her, never relenting in their rhythmic dance that festooned her core with an insatiable hunger. She bucked against him, incapable of forming any coherent thought as his skillful fingers teased and enticed her senses to erupt.
Her body shook with each lick, her arousal building to a fever pitch. He thrust his fingers deeply as his tongue worked its magic.
She cried out, her orgasm washing over her like a tidal wave. Her muscles clenched around his fingers as she came, her moans filling the room.
He continued his relentless assault on her pleasure centers, not stopping until she had shuddered through her climax. Then he slowly drew back, his fingers trailing across her moist and swollen folds before making their way up her stomach and across her breasts.
She panted heavily. Her eyes locked on his. He leaned in, their lips barely brushing against each other. "I want you," he whispered hoarsely.
"I'm yours," she breathlessly replied. “Take me.”
He kissed her gently, his hands still lingering on her body, tracing her curves and pulling her closer to him. She could feel the heat of his desire, his heart pounding against her chest.
As he entered her, she let out a gasp, her body responding to his with a shower of fireworks.
He thrust deeper, claiming every inch of her with a fervor that sent her senses reeling. Their bodies melded together in a primal dance, the rhythm of their lovemaking echoing through the room like a symphony of lust.
Her nails dug into his back as he pounded into her, her breath coming in ragged gasps. The heat between them felt almost palpable, the passion and desire burning away all inhibitions and leaving only raw, unchecked need.
His lips grazed her throat, his teeth gently nipping at her skin as he took her to new heights of pleasure. She cried out, her climax shattering within her, waves of pleasure crashing against her senses.
Their bodies continued to move in sync, the pulse of their lovemaking driving them higher and higher. Her orgasm lingered, a sweet and intoxicating haze that clouded her mind.
As he surged toward his own release, his muscles tensing and his breath coming in ragged gasps, she could feel his desire for her building like a tempest. The room seemed to grow hotter, the air thick with the heady scent of their passion.
He thrust one last time, burying himself deep within her, and their bodies seemed to merge into a single entity. His release erupted within her, a flood of warmth that spread out from his core, uniting them completely.
She held him close, their hearts beating as one in the aftermath of their lovemaking. The room was silent, but for the water of the shower and the gasps of their intense passion.
Slowly, they disentangled themselves, their bodies still trembling with the power of the release they had shared. He pulled her close, their bodies resting against one another as they caught their breath.
In the dim light of the shower, she traced the lines of his face with her eyes, taking in the raw intensity of his expression. He leaned down, their lips meeting once again in a tender, lingering kiss.
She felt the bond between them deepen, as if they had become one in more than just their physical union. Their pulses synchronized, their souls melded together in a way that seemed to transcend the physical realm.
As they stepped out of the shower, they dried each other off, their touch gentle and tender. This wasn’t just sex, but she didn’t dare think beyond today. She couldn’t let herself even fantasize about a future.
Not now.
Not yet.
“I don’t know about you, but I need coffee.” He took her robe and wrapped it around her body before hiking up his jeans. He wrapped his watch around his wrist. “Since I’m showered, I’ve got a little more time this morning. Let’s go downstairs and we can chat about what Timothy had to say.”
She curled her fingers around his thick biceps. “Before we do that, I need to thank you.”
“For what?” He cocked his head.
“Last night. Most men would have either ignored what I really needed and taken me to bed, or walked out that door because I was too much to handle.”
He smiled. “My first thought was to say I’m not most men.” He chuckled. “But that sounds pretty damn arrogant, now doesn’t it, and we both know I’m not the best when it comes to?—”
She hushed him with a kiss. “It wouldn’t be cocky at all for you to say that, especially because you’re most definitely unique, and I mean that in a good way. And as far as you being a goof, well, it’s more like a bit old-fashioned, and honestly, it’s refreshing.” She patted his chest. “Go make coffee. I’ll be down in a second.”
“I can handle that.” He stepped from the bathroom and headed down the steps.
She was in trouble in more ways than one.
Garth made two mugs of coffee and found a cereal he could live with, though all she had was oat milk. It wasn’t the worst, but it wasn’t regular milk either.
And the cereal wasn’t his favorite.
But it was food.
He’d learned in the military that food wasn’t about taste, but fueling his body, so he could eat almost anything. But given the choice, he liked sugar and carbs. One of these days it was going to catch up to him and he knew it.
But until that day, he was going to eat all the crap.
He rinsed out his bowl and placed it in the dishwasher, checking the time. It was only five thirty. He had an hour. But doing the walk of shame while Veronica and Rhonda were at the bus stop, well, that was something he didn’t want to deal with again.
Maybe he’d slip out the back.
Amber appeared, once again wearing his clothes.
Damn, he could get used to that look.
“Sorry that took a bit,” she said. “I had to blow dry my hair before it got too wild.”
“No worries.” He handed her a mug. “I just have to give myself enough time to go back to my place and change my clothes. It wouldn’t be a good look if I wore what I had on yesterday.”
She laughed. “I suppose not.”
“I don’t have much to report,” he decided to dive into the case. “I left copies of everything with Timothy, my boss over at the Aegis Network.”
“Does he believe this worth looking into, or does he think open-and-shut case.”
“He’s of the same train of thought I am. That the new information you provided us with from Steve’s computer changes how we need to look at this. But there are so many players. So many unknowns that it’s going to take us a while to sort through it all.”
“Can I ask a question?”
He nodded.
“If I hadn’t found that, would you all still believe I was crazy?”
“No one ever thought that. But.” He held up his finger. “Based on the reports alone, it’s a clean case. No reason to think otherwise. We need to backtrack through your brother’s articles. All those notes. Some of that leads us right back to Jeff Bellen.”
“And corruption.”
“Not necessarily, and certainly not where you believe.” He took her hand and kissed it. “I’m going to be speaking to Kaelie today. She runs a tight ship, especially after one of our own tried to kill Buddy. I’m aware that there can be bad cops. Bad firefighters. Bad politicians. I’ve plucked out the facts that can’t be refuted.”
“I don’t need you to repeat all that. It will only start a fight.”
“Look. There are enough dead bodies related to whatever your brother was working on, but there are too many things we don’t know. We’re digging, but it has to be done a certain way to ensure your safety, because if your brother was murdered, you’ve made enough noise for all of us to be concerned.” He cocked a brow. “What are your plans today?”
“I have a showing with a new client. After that, paperwork on a closing and doing my best not to go nuts.”
“I’d like for you to text me when you get there and when you get home,” he said. “I have mandatory classroom training all day, but I can have my phone with me. You can reach out anytime.”
“Did something else happen? Because now you’re scaring me,” she said.
“It’s not that. But the more I look at all this, the more I do think Steve was onto something. I don’t know what that was and the pieces aren’t falling into place nice and neat. But again, you made yourself a target and I don’t like leaving you.”
She set her mug on the counter and pressed her body against his, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. “Thank you for being concerned about me. It’s nice because I don’t have anyone left.”
“You have me.” He kissed her nose. “Lock up after I leave and don’t forget to text me, or I will bombard your phone with crazy messages.” He took her hand and waltzed toward the front door.
“Anyone ever tell you that you’re cute when you get all protective and shit?”
“I had one ex-girlfriend who told me it was annoying as fuck.”
“How many girlfriends have you had?”
“Not very many, actually.” He chuckled. “Ones that last any length of time, maybe four and all of them had the same thing to say when we broke up.”
“What’s that?”
“I’m a little too intense and at the same time emotionally unavailable because I loved my job more than them.”
“Are you kidding me?” She leaned against the doorjamb. “That doesn’t make sense. The man who’s looking for commitment is afraid of commitment?”
“Not at all, but I wasn’t willing to change. One of them didn’t like the overnights. She wanted me to find something else. Wasn’t going to happen. Another one took issue with me and my work with the Aegis Network. Another thing I’m not going to give up for anyone. This is who am.”
“And the other two?”
He sighed. “Couldn’t handle the deployments when I was in the Air Force. It’s not an easy life and not for everyone. Funny thing is, Cheryl, the girl I was seeing when I left the military and followed Arthur here, was thrilled. But she didn’t want to move. She begged me to find employment where I was last stationed. I thought about it for a hot second. I mean, I really considered it. I cared about her a great deal. But then she tried to talk me into working at her father’s car dealership. Fuck that. When I graduated college, I worked sales for my dad. It sucked. I told her I’d stay and be a fireman, but she told me the only way we’d work was if I found something that made more money and had better hours. I followed Arthur here and that was the end of that.”
“Sounds like you did love your job and your crew more than those women.”
He burst out laughing. It wasn’t the first time he’d heard that. His parents told him that all the time. So did his buddies. Maybe they were right because he hadn’t been all that heartbroken over the breakups. But he hadn’t asked them to change who they were. The only one he’d ever asked anything of was Cheryl and that was to move with him, but he never told her not to work. Or not to be a teacher.
What she wanted was for him to change who he was at his core.
“Why is that so funny?” she asked.
“Let me ask you this,” Garth said. “If a man you were dating asked you to give up your career because he didn’t like the hours, or whatever, would you think that was fair?”
“I guess that would depend on the actual complaint.” She arched a brow. “Did you hide from your relationship in your job?”
He shook his head. “It’s a career. It’s what I’m good at. Sometimes the hours suck and they can be hard on a family. But lots of people make it work without having to have anyone compromise who they are. Arthur still works both jobs; he just does more admin stuff with the Aegis Network these days, only taking assignments when they work for his family or are of the less dangerous variety. Leaving those for us single guys.”
“I’ve seen those scars on your body.”
He rubbed his shoulder. Being shot at, or being shot, was never fun. Neither was being burned. But it happened. “I don’t have as many as some of my buddies, but it does go with the territory.”
She palmed his cheek. “It does and you’re right. No one should ask you to change who you are.” She kissed him, hard. “I’ll text you when I get where I’m going.”
“Please be aware of your surroundings. If you feel like you’re being watched or followed, call me. I’ll see if there’s a cop friend of mine in the area who can check on things.”
“You’re a sweet man.” She gave him a little shove out the front door. “I’ll see you tonight.”
He jogged down the steps just as Veronica approached the school bus stop with her children.
Fucking wonderful.
He waved, giving her his best smile as he made a beeline for his front door. He was sure Veronica was going to have something to say about him leaving Amber’s house two mornings in a row, but he wasn’t about to deal with it this morning.