Ch. 3 #2
However, I stayed away from a lot because of my fibromyalgia.
I didn’t want to be anyone else’s burden and the pain Nesh said labor bestows wasn’t helping my condition at all.
If anything, my ass would be doped up somewhere not able to function before I could deliver the child.
I wasn’t about to put anyone, especially my child, through any unnecessary stress.
“If God allows it Mama, then sure. I’ll give you and Dad a grandchild,” I said telling her what she wanted to hear. Chinara wasn’t going to stop if I didn’t.
“There you go telling me what I want to hear as you did when you were a little girl. You do know I know when I’m being put at ease. I raised you and that hasn’t worked on me in years. This is on our Christmas list so whenever you get around to it, that’d be nice.”
I had to laugh at her response because it was innocent, but it was also entitled in a way.
I guess I made them into the spoiled adults they were.
It was a promise I made a while back; I just wasn’t expecting her to keep pestering me about it.
If I ever gave a man the time of day for real, maybe it would happen.
As of now, I wasn’t searching for anything new in my life.
“Christmas, Mama? That’s in like four months and my thirtieth birthday is before that. I know you aren’t expecting anything from me within that time frame. Look, when I meet a man that’s good enough, I will gladly open my womb to him. Are you satisfied?” I was over the topic at hand already.
“I can see I’ve aggravated you. My guess is you’re about to leave then.”
“I am and it’s not because you aggravated me. I have an appointment with Dr. Frances in about thirty minutes. I’ve given you and Dad enough of my time. I will bring you something nice in a few months and it’s not in the form of a baby. See you later, Mama. I love you.”
Standing, I approached her giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. I was out of there before she could even grasp what was happening. I loved my parents deeply, but I refused to give them a damn grandchild all because that’s what they asked for. Some things were nonnegotiable.
Walking out the front door, I pressed the button on my keys to unlock my car door.
I climbed inside and got comfortable as I released a deep sigh.
My mother was worrisome and once she got started so would my father.
I didn’t have time for that conversation today.
All I wanted was to get this appointment over with so I go could go home and relax before I gave my all to the kids at the agency in two days.
Starting the car, I backed out the driveway and headed in the direction of Dr. Frances place of employment.
A Woman’s Touch was where I’d gone since I was eighteen.
A lot of the doctor’s there new me by first name and vice versa.
They were more than sweet and helpful. When Dr. Frances couldn’t take me, one of them would volunteer.
They loved me down there which made the visits more warming.
It didn’t feel like I was just another woman with issues.
The drive was approximately thirteen minutes away from my parents’ home.
The traffic was light, and I was able to cruise without getting frustrated with the many residents in Sage Springs.
By the time I arrived, I had seven minutes on the clock to check in.
I made good timing. I doubled checked my purse to make sure I had my calendar that tracked my episodes since my last visit before exiting the car.
Entering the building shortly after, I noticed the lobby was pretty packed out. I checked in and took the first seat I found available. Being in a crowded environment wasn’t new but it was overwhelming. I truly hated it. Squeezing everybody in at one time was something I never really understood.
“Afor.” The nurse stepped from behind the closed door with a file in tow, calling for me.
The many glares I got from being called first was comical.
Dr. Frances didn’t play about me. I made my way over to the nurse and entered the same door she surfaced from.
“First thing’s first, let’s get your weight. Step on the scale for me.”
I did so and a smile cracked my lips. Mhmm, get thick on them, Che! It wasn’t nothing but ten pounds. Nevertheless, I was gaining and proud of it. I’d been at a solid 125 pounds since I was eighteen. This would be little to a lot but as a model, the gain is more than something to brag about.
Once she was done getting my weight, she led me down the hall to an exam room.
Entering, I placed my purse on the counter and took a seat in the chair next to it.
Sitting on the table like a child wasn’t really my thing.
The nurse started on my blood pressure and all that other shit before taking a seat of her own.
“Okay, Cheyonne, how’s it going? Has anything changed? Is there anything Dr. Frances should know about?”
“Uh, yeah. So, I still get my episodes but the duration of them is getting longer. They’re not lasting hours anymore, it’s progressed to days now. It takes darn near a week before I’m completely myself again. I’m not used to this,” I answered.
“When was the last one?”
“I’d say maybe a month ago. I was under a lot of pressure with the recent show in Milan and overexerted myself.
I felt it coming but it happened before the show, so I was good to go when it was time to walk.
I’m actually really good right now. No tingling, no pain, no headaches, no dizziness… I’m fine.”
She nodded and went to pecking on her keyboard. A knock rang out on the door and in walked the lady of the hour. Dr. Frances held a smile on her face as she always did and a strong floral scent followed. Nothing changed with her.
“My favorite Barbie. Cheyonne it’s so good to see you,” she sang.
“It’s good to see you, too, Dr. Frances. How are you?”
“Great. Thanks for asking.”
Her excitement caused me to return a smile of my own. She was a ball of joy and could bring anyone out of a funk with her upbeat spirit. She washed her hands and took a seat on the exam stool. The burse gave her access to the computer as she stood to the side.
“Okay, so your flares are becoming a problem, right?”
“Slightly. The symptoms are the same, nothing new in that department. However, they last for days now. What’s that about?” I was worried and lowkey scared.
“It could just be time for an injection. Your last one was six months ago. Do the meds help any? What are you on again? Let me see.” She clicked a few times before her focus was back on me. “Flexeril and pregabalin. Are they helping?”
“They work just fine. I thought maybe the condition was getting worse, but hearing I just needed an injection is relieving. I can breathe better now.” I didn’t want to take more test or any of that. I was quite over this diagnosis to be frank.
“How about we go through our usual routine and see if there has been a change in anything? I want to say it’s nothing but then again this is your body, and you know it better than me. Karana, do you mind handling that for me?”
“Sure thing, doctor.”
I stood and followed the nurse out the room.
She led me to the same room I’d gone to for years now.
I ran through the x-rays and blood tests as usual.
I’d been poked for quite some time now, so it no longer bothered me.
I’d become immune to the shit if I was being honest. Anytime I came here for all this mess, I felt like some kind of damn test subject or something. I hated this shit.
Twenty minutes later, I was back in my room and Dr. Frances had stepped out to review the results.
I handled the emails that went unanswered for the time being.
I really needed my secretary to step up and do her job.
Deena slacked when I wasn’t around. More time passed as I waited for Dr. Frances to return.
By the time she did, it was close to five.
I knew the traffic had picked up and that was going to frustrate me even more.
“Knock, knock.” Dr. Frances entered wearing that same smile and I lowkey got irritated by it. I just knew she was coming with some bull.
“So, good news. Nothing has progressed. I think your body just needs the cortisone and everything would be okay. If at any given moment you feel like the injections aren’t doing what they’re supposed to, don’t hesitate to call.”
“I know the drill. I’m just glad you didn’t bring back bad news. I was preparing myself for it,” I said relaxing a bit.
“Don’t always think the worse, Cheyonne. Where was the pain the most during your last flare?” she questioned. That was so she could know exactly where to stick me.
“It was more in my legs than anything. I’ll take the shot in my knee today.”
“Sounds good to me. Let’s get you together and on your way.”
The nurse administered the shot, and I could’ve sworn she poked me a lil’ harder than usual. The cortisone felt damned good though. I didn’t realize I was in slight pain until now. I guess dealing with this condition on a daily basis I’ve grown immune to it.
“Oh, I do have a question before I leave Dr. Frances. Kids. My parents have me wondering if it’s an option. So… is it?”
“It’s always an option, but it’s also a risk. I’m afraid your body can’t handle it but then again, I’m not God. He has the last say so. I don’t recommend it but if it is something you’re serious about, I will research some plans to bring you through a successful one,” she said.
“Thank you so much.”
Shortly after, I was making my way out the door and then out the building.
My busy day was finally coming to an end.
Hopping in my ride, I backed out, then hit the main road.
I owed no one else my time. From my parents to Dr. Frances, nothing but meaningless conversations happened. I was ready for my bed.
The traffic was indeed too damn much. Sometimes I really hated the way people gravitated to Sage Springs.
It was nothing here but those with money and then those without as much.
I had to give it to the ones that made the Springs look good though.
From the ball players that won championships to CEOs that built businesses brick by brick, it was lowkey something to brag about.
I just wanted something new or someone new in my life to make the city fun again.
It took me a little over forty minutes to get home.
I was beyond exhausted and hungry as well.
Finally pulling into my driveway, I entered the garage parking next to my G-wagon.
Having everything a family of three or more would have but only one person enjoying it was just as stressful.
My mother must’ve sensed that I was entering that phase where I thought I was ready for a relationship and truly wasn’t.
Maybe twice a year I got in a rut where I wanted to love and be loved.
I never really got to focus on anyone a hundred percent because of the career I chose.
I traveled more than a damn pilot depending on my schedule leaving me no time to entertain anyone.
However, I had more than a little extra time on my hands these days. A man didn’t sound so bad.