45. Now
Now: March 14th
I t’s a Friday evening, and Wendy has been here the last hour and a half running through everything with me one last time before my big book release. Well, I like to tell her it’s our big release because she does a ton of work behind the scenes. She helps bring the magic of the story to life. I couldn’t have gotten this far without her.
The last book of The Honey Sisters trilogy officially releases a week from tomorrow. It’s been a long journey, and I can’t believe it’s finally coming to an end. I haven’t started working on anything else yet. I might even be taking a small break, but I haven’t decided yet. We’ll see.
The series is based on some of the silly
adventures me and my mom used to go on. Like all the times we’d play hooky during school, and that time she drove us out to California to meet a sister I’m not sure was her sister after all. My story is fictionalized following a set of three sisters who grew up apart and through different and crazy circumstances they were brought back together. Each story is written from a different sister’s point of view. Honey is their last name, and by the end, they all decide to start a honey business together on a farm they’d grown up on during some part of their lives. It’s a beautiful story that I poured my heart and soul into, and I’m finally ready to share it with the rest of the world.
Not that long ago, a local filmmaker, who partners with somebody in LA, expressed interest in my trilogy and offered me a studio deal if I ever wanted to turn this into something big, like a TV show. I didn’t exactly decline, but I haven’t said yes yet, either. I need time to decide. Luckily, it’s somebody Wendy and I both know and it’ll be easy to get back in touch with them if I ever decide that’s something I want to pursue. Let’s see how this last book kicks off first and go from there.
“Have you thought any more about it?” Wendy asks me now. We are sitting on the floor by the couch in the living room.
My thoughts must have wandered off because I missed what she asked me.
“Thought about what?” I ask absentmindedly as I flip through the pages of my novel. The proof copy came in about a month ago. Wendy surprised me with a special edition copy of my novel before its release date, and I’m holding it in my hands for the first time. I can’t stop turning it over and flipping through the pages. Needless to say, it might be my favorite book yet. Anytime a new release of mine hits the shelves, it automatically becomes my new favorite. Not to mention, it’s also a bit of a distraction.
“About signing again at Books and Beyond. They want you to come back, Nicki. I mean Phoenix. Sorry, I’m still getting used to calling you by your real name,” she says, blushing.
Oh, right. That. The thought of doing another signing terrifies me. Then another idea strikes me.
“Actually, I think I’d like to do it somewhere else,” I say, setting my book down in my lap and looking over at her. She’s sitting with her legs crossed and a binder in her lap. She’s always been over-the-top organized when it comes to everything, and I’m super grateful.
“Oh, yeah? Where’s that?” she questions, curious.
“At G&G,” I say with a straight face. The idea just came to me, but I’ve decided to run with it for the moment. See what she thinks. And by the funny look on her face, she can’t tell if I'm serious or not.
“I’m serious, I think it would be the perfect place to do my next book signing. Not during group, of course. Those meetings are special, and I wouldn’t want to stomp over that. But I think if they are invited, it might be something cool for them.” Her eyes meet mine and she nods, understanding but slightly skeptical.
She leans over and gives my knee a soft squeeze. “I am still so proud of you for what you did last time you were there. That was so brave, and I don’t think I could have done it. I wouldn’t have. I would have walked out before I’d been able to get any words out.”
She lost her mom at a young age to cancer, and while it’s not the same as what happened to mine, she knows what it feels like to grow up without a mom.
“Thank you,” I say quietly. “I wanted to. A few times. Walk out. But I didn’t. That’s the thing about being brave. It’s pushing through, especially when everything in you is screaming the opposite. I’m glad I didn’t.”
At this, she wiggles her eyebrows, and I don’t know where she’s about to steer us, but it can’t be good. There’s a mischievous gleam in her eyes.
“And then you met up with a certain someone…” She playfully hits my arm like we are teenagers gossiping about boys.
I feel like a teenager again, remembering the times I’d done this very thing with my mom. I smile at the familiar memory.
“Yes, I did,” I say.
“How’s that going, by the way? I meant to ask.” She leans back into the couch and grabs a blanket from nearby, wrapping it around herself .
“Really well, I think. It’s been almost a month. Can you believe it?”
“No, I can’t. That’s amazing. He seems good for you,” she says.
“Yeah, thanks. I think so too. We are taking things slow, but we’re both okay with that since neither of us has much experience when it comes to dating and relationships. Honestly, he’s one of the most patient people I’ve ever met.”
“Yeah, it sure seems that way. Good for you. You deserve this.”
“You think so?” I ask. For the longest time, I convinced myself of the opposite. I never thought I’d be capable of loving somebody else. If I was lucky enough to find somebody, I didn’t think they’d stick around. It’s still fairly early and things can change, but we are taking things day by day, moment by moment, and seeing where that takes us.
“I know so. It just feels right. Like this could be it.” She’s always been the more optimistic out of the two of us, and I hope she’s right.
“I sure hope so. He’s coming with me to apartment shop tomorrow.”
“Oh? Is he really?” She’s doing that crazy eyebrow thing at me again. Stop it.
“It’s not like that. He hasn’t asked me to move in with him yet.” I feel my cheeks turn pink.
“No? Darn,” she says, casually pretending to check her nails.
“He offered to help me look around. He knows of some good apartment complexes and helped arrange appointments for me. Plus, he doesn’t mind chauffeuring me around.”
“Oh, alright. But as soon as you get the keys I want to help you move in and get all set up. I think this is a really big step for you, and I want to be there any way that I can. You’re a good friend, don’t sell yourself short.”
Friend. I do sell myself short, too often. She’s the best. She’s turning me into a mushball. Any second I’m going to melt at our feet .
“Thank you. That’s kind of you, Wendy.”
“Of course, I’m more than happy to help. The girls would love to come too. They are really big into decorating their rooms right now.”
I laugh at this. I’m sure they are.
“Good luck tomorrow. I know it’s tough picking out a new place, especially knowing that it's not a part of your mom’s story. But I think you’ve been living in her shadow for far too long now, and it’s time you start living yours.”
She’s right. I know she is. I’ve been living on my own for years, but not really. This isn’t the same. It’s time I do this for myself.
“You’re right. It’s been time for a long time, but I finally feel ready to take this leap.”
“I’m so freaking proud of you,” she says, her eyes blurring.
“Come here,” I offer, holding out both of my arms to her.
We embrace and wipe our eyes as we draw back.
“I think the G&G location is a great idea. But it is a little last minute and I’ll need to contact them ASAP to see if they can help make this happen.”
I have all the confidence in the world that she will, and even if it doesn’t work out that’s okay too. I know with Wendy on my side everything will turn out perfect, no matter what.