34
Logan
“From now on, this is your side of the bed. The one with the glass of water. That way you don’t need to get up to drink. Of course, you can... if you want.”
I fluff up the pillow beneath her as she gives me a little grimace.
“I got you lots of things to read,” I continue. “All your favorite magazines. I can get you books too, if you want, or comics, or whatever you like. Here’s the remote control for the TV, and you can put on all the reality shows you want. And this is for you.”
The small, sad smile that seems to have become a permanent part of her face since she woke up in the hospital fades just a bit as I show her a large orange Hermes box. Still, I can tell the sadness is lurking just underneath, and my heart squeezes as I realize just how powerless I am to fix her.
“Logan! A Birkin bag? How the hell did you get this? Doesn’t it cost more than like... a car?”
“Not the kind of car you’re going to be driving around in from now on,” I tell her, kissing her freckled forehead.
“Oh?” She arches a brow. “Does that mean I’ll be able to drive your car?”
“That’s not what I meant, but...” I pause, wondering just how many lies I’ll need to tell her to make her happy again. “Well... yes, why not?”
“Really?” She tries to sit up, wincing at the weight of the neck brace. “All by myself?”
I kiss her so I don’t have to answer right away. “Maybe,” I settle on. “It’s going to take you a little while to get well. After that... we’ll see.”
_
I really don’t want to see.
I know I’m a special kind of psychopath for secretly hoping she never gets well, just so I don’t have to deal with what comes after.
It’s easy to talk about freedom with a girl who can barely sit up.
But once she gets well enough to move around, and requests the freedom I’ve been dangling before her... what then?
The very next day, she’s already strong enough to get out of bed. I return from a meeting to find her standing in the center of the bedroom, her forehead creased with pain.
“Lia,” I say quickly, walking toward her. “You look like you’re in pain. You should get back in bed.”
“No.” She tries to shake her head, but clearly thinks better of it. “I want to go out. I want to... to walk around. To drive your car.”
“Okay, baby. You’ll be able to do that very soon. But right now, I want you to lie down. Don’t break your neck all over again, huh?”
“I just want to go out,” she groans. “I won’t drive myself—not yet. But I could lie down in the passenger seat, and you’d take me for a ride. I want to go down to the boulevard with all the designer boutiques.”
“Hmm.” I stroke her hair and kiss her freckles. “I really wish you’d rest, baby.”
“If you don’t have time,” she mumbles, “I can ask Everest to take me.”
“Fuck that.” I kiss her lips. “I’ll take you, baby. We’ll go out and I’ll buy you whatever you want. What do you want?”
Excitement flickers in her gaze. “I want... the most expensive thing we can find.”
“Sure, baby. I’ll find it for you.”
“No, I want to find it. I want to go to every single store in Astley, and find the most expensive thing there is, and make you buy it for me.”
I let out a chuckle. “My spoiled little baby. Fine. Then that’s just what we’ll do. Spend the day resting, and tomorrow, we’ll hit the town.”
_
“Fuck me, I’d forgotten how delicious chocolate chip cookies were,” says Lia, sitting back against the passenger seat as I take her for the promised drive. “Oops, sorry!”
I make an amused grimace as Lia accidentally sprays cookie crumbs all over me. “Don’t worry, baby. There’s nothing I’d rather have decorating my leather seats than your spit.”
“Thought so.” She settles back, trying to act comfortable, but I can tell by the drawn lines on her face that she’s in pain. “Give me another cookie, so I can spit some more.”
“No more cookies for you, baby. It’s too early; I want you to be healthy.”
“Shut up, Logan! Ow! Fuck!” She’s just jerked up in her seat, and cries out in pain.
“Take it easy,” I warn her, pushing her back gently.
“Stop fucking controlling me!” She struggles away from my hand despite the pain that distorts her features.
“Okay, baby. Okay. I’m sorry.” I stroke her arm and hair until she’s sitting back against her seat, breathing heavily. “I didn’t mean to. You can have another cookie. Want a cookie?”
“Logan...” She hides her face in her hands, a loud mix of sobs and laughter leaving her. “I’m sorry. I’m the one who’s sorry. You’re being so sweet to me, and I’m so... so jumpy.”
“You’ve been through a lot,” I soothe her, “and all because of me. I’ve been so cruel. And I know I’m controlling. I’m sorry, baby. Have as many cookies as you want.”
She sniffs loudly and wipes her tears away before I can.
“It’s okay,” she mumbles. “I don’t want any more cookies.”
“Okay, well, tell me what you want. Whatever you want, I’ll get for you.”
“You know what I want,” she sighs.
I grin. “The most expensive thing we can buy in Astley, huh?”
“No, not that. You know what I want.”
“Yeah.” I stroke the freckles on her face. “Freedom. But that’s what I’m giving you, isn’t it? Don’t you feel free right now?”
She hesitates. “Maybe... maybe if I didn’t have my neck brace, I’d feel more free. Will you keep being nice to me once I’ve taken it off? Will you still let me be free?”
“Well...” My cell phone buzzes just then, and I look down, uneasy relief invading my stomach when I read the message.
Everest: The camera guys are here. They’re setting up the system now, and the others will be here in an hour. They’re asking what kind of locks you want on the windows.
“Logan. Will I also be free when my neck brace is off?”
“Hmm?” I quickly stuff my cell phone back into my pocket and smile at Lia. “Of course, baby,” I lie to her, kissing her on her freckled nose. “Of course you will be.”
_
“Logan! Fuck! I hate you! Fuck!”
“Shh, Lia. It’s nothing. I can explain...”
“You promised, Logan. You promised!”
“I did. A few locks on the windows don’t mean I’m taking away your freedom. Right? I just don’t want you to...”
“To what, Logan?” she snaps, her face red with a mix of pain and anger.
“To fall,” I finish helplessly. “Imagine tripping over a cord, and then, bam...”
She rolls her eyes, or at least tries to, before dumping the bag full of designer clothes I bought her onto the bed. “You’re locking me in, Logan.”
“I’m not.” I reach my arms awkwardly around her, trying to find a way to hug her without hurting her.
“This wasn’t even my idea. Ask anyone. There are precautions to take in situations like these.
Just until we’re sure that you’re absolutely fine.
It has nothing to do with freedom. When someone has...
well... hurt herself like you have, it’s normal to lock windows, remove scissors, razors... ”
She glares at me. “How the hell am I supposed to shave, then? You really want a hairy girl between the sheets?”
Chuckling, I sit down on the bed and pull her down gently onto my lap. Then I stroke all the way up her sides and she jerks when my fingers caress her decidedly hairy armpits. “Ow! Asshole! My neck hurts!”
“It’s not my fault you’re a ticklish baby,” I tease her, stroking more insistently over her armpits and causing her to jerk around more. “I just wanted to see the hair situation for myself. Damn, you are a hairy girl, aren’t you? Bet I could braid that shit.”
She lets out a tiny giggle. “Logan, stop!” Her face grows red as she tries to hold her neck still while I torture her, and when I at last take pity on her, she lets out a shuddering sigh of relief.
“Fuck, baby.” I let my fingers trail toward her bellybutton and dip under her jeans. “Fuck, I need you. This is killing me. Not... literally, of course.”
“I hate you,” she says again, though I can tell she’s struggling not to laugh. “But you know, I wouldn’t mind...” She clears her throat. “I mean, I hate you, but I wouldn’t hate it if you let me come.”
“Hmm.” I take a deep breath to move past my own frustration. “Not while you’re like this. You’re in a lot of pain, and I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Oh, but Logan,” she pleads, “you wouldn’t hurt me! Please, I really want to...” She squirms in my lap, and the feel of her thick ass against my cock nearly makes me groan.
“Just touching your armpits hurt you, baby. Be reasonable.”
“That’s different,” she protests. “I’m just ticklish. I’ll be very still, I promise. I won’t move a muscle, and...”
“Hell no.” I slide her gently off my lap. “There’s no way you could possibly stay still with me fucking you. We’re going to wait until your neck brace is off. And when that day comes... well, so will you.”