Chapter 49 - Marco
I stood on the balcony with my elbows resting lightly against the metal railing, face tipped upward toward the night sky.
The stars were clearer here than they ever were near the academy.
In the city they always looked diluted, washed out by streetlights and neon signs, but from Alexei’s high-rise apartment they felt closer somehow - scattered across the dark like someone had carefully placed each one by hand.
I could make out the faint shape of constellations I only half-remembered from childhood.
Behind me, through the open glass doors, music drifted out from the living room.
I had been standing out here for almost twenty minutes, just breathing.
It still felt strange some nights - standing without pain, without the constant awareness of a body that might fail at any moment. The new heart beat steady and strong beneath my ribs. I pressed my palm lightly over it, feeling the rhythm, and smiled to myself.
Then strong arms slid around my waist from behind.
I didn’t startle. I knew the exact weight of those hands, the exact way they settled just above my hips, the faint scent of his cologne mixed with the clean smell of the shirt he had changed into after coming home. I smiled before I even turned, the corners of my mouth lifting almost automatically.
“You’re late,” I murmured, though there was no real accusation in it.
His chest pressed against my back as he hummed a soft answer, chin resting lightly on the top of my head for a moment.
I let myself lean into him completely, eyes still on the stars.
His hands were warm even through the thin fabric of my sweater.
One of his thumbs moved in a absent-minded stroke against my side, back and forth, like he needed the contact as much as I did.
Eventually I turned carefully in the circle of his arms until I was facing him.
Alexei looked down at me with that rare, private smile reserved only for me. Sometimes I wonder if the stars only exist because the universe was trying to imitate his smile.
“Hi, baby,” I whispered.
He leaned down and kissed me. When he pulled back I was still smiling, a little shy.
My fingers found the front of his shirt and toyed with one of the buttons, suddenly needing something to do with my hands.
“Was everything okay?” I asked quietly. “You were gone longer than usual.”
Alexei’s hands stayed on my waist. He gave a small shrug, the motion careful so he wouldn’t dislodge me.
“Just meetings. Nothing worth bringing home.”
I nodded, accepting the answer the way I always did. There were parts of his world I still didn’t fully understand, and parts I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to. What mattered was that he had come back to me.
I rested my forehead against his chest for a moment, listening to the beat of his heart.
His arms adjusted automatically, one hand sliding up to cradle the back of my head.
We stood like that for a long time, swaying the tiniest bit whenever the wind moved across the balcony.
The music continued to play behind us. “You’re quiet tonight,” he murmured eventually, voice low against my hair.
I smiled into his shirt. “I’m happy.”
Alexei’s hand paused in my hair, then resumed its slow stroke. I felt him press a kiss to the top of my head. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” I tilted my face up again so I could see him properly. “I am so happy when I am with you.”
A faint flush touched the tops of his cheeks. It was still one of my favorite things - watching the most dangerous man I knew get a little flustered over something so simple. I reached up and traced the line of his jaw with my fingertips. “I missed you.”
Alexei’s eyes softened even further. He caught my hand and turned his head just enough to press a kiss to the center of my palm.
“I missed you too, Malyshka.”
The pet name made my stomach flutter the way it always did. I ducked my head for a second, suddenly shy, then peeked up at him through my lashes. He was still watching me with that same gentle expression, like I was something precious he couldn’t quite believe he was allowed to hold.
We stayed like that for a while longer - talking about nothing important.
I told him about the book I had been reading on the couch earlier.
He listened like every word mattered. I asked if he had eaten.
He admitted he hadn’t, and I scolded him softly until he promised he would later.
At some point his hands slid under the back of my sweater just enough to rest against the warm skin there, thumbs stroking circles that made me melt further into him.
The music shifted into another slow song.
I listened to it for a few seconds, head still resting against his chest, and felt a small, shy idea take shape. My fingers toyed with his shirt again.
“…Do you want to dance with me?”
Alexei blinked, genuine surprise flickering across his face. “Dance?”
I nodded, suddenly very aware of how quiet the balcony had become. “Hm.”
Before I could lose my nerve I reached for one of his hands and carefully guided it to my waist, settling it there firmly. My other hand found his free one and laced our fingers together.
“Like this,” I said softly, and a small giggle escaped me at how stiff he suddenly looked.
I started to move, slow steps that matched the music drifting around us. Alexei clearly had no idea what he was doing. His movements were careful, like he was afraid of stepping on me or somehow doing it wrong. But he tried.
“You’re supposed to lead,” he muttered after a particularly awkward step, though there was no real complaint in it.
I grinned up at him. “I’m teaching you. Be patient.”
He huffed a soft laugh and adjusted his hold, following my next step more smoothly. Then, without warning, he spun me.
It was clumsy and imperfect. The night air brushed across my face as I turned, stars blurring for a second, and when I came back around he was still smiling. If heaven ever touched the earth, I think it did so in the shape of his smile.
I rested my cheek against his chest again while we swayed.
“See?” I whispered. “You’re already better.”
Alexei’s arms tightened around me. He pressed another slow kiss into my hair.
We kept dancing long after the song ended, moving to whatever melody came next, the rest of the world forgotten beyond the circle of his arms and the endless scatter of stars above us.
Then his voice came, lower than usual. “Marco… there is something I should tell you.”
I looked up.
Alexei looked anxious. His green eyes flicked away for half a second before forcing themselves back to mine. There weren’t many things in the world that made Alexei Morozov look like that. The sight alone made something protective rise in my chest.
A thin news report filtered up in my head from this morning when I heard the news.
“…authorities are still investigating the coordinated massacre that took place across New York earlier this month. One hundred and forty-seven people were killed in a single night. Officials describe the attacks as precise—”
How much of a coincidence could it possibly be?
I wasn’t stupid.
But I also wasn’t willing to let whatever truth lived behind that anxiety step between us.
I moved, rising onto my toes, I reached up and pressed my hand firmly over Alexei’s mouth, stopping whatever confession had been about to leave it. His eyes widened at once.
“I love you,” I confessed.
“I love you… so if what you’re about to say gets in the way of this… of us… in any way, then I need you to not say it.”
I didn’t actually know the exact shape of the secret he was carrying.
There were a hundred possibilities, and only a few of them terrified me.
But I knew him. I knew there weren’t many things that made him look this nervous.
And I knew the massacre had happened on the same night my body finally gave out.
The suspicion had lived in the back of my mind for weeks but I had chosen not to dig.
I had always been selfish when it came to Alexei Morozov.
I always would be.
My hand stayed over his mouth for another long second. I watched the way his eyes searched mine, wide and stunned, as if he had never expected those three words to come from me at all.
I lowered my hand. “Did you just say…”
I nodded. My fingers came up to cup his cheeks, thumbs brushing the line of his cheekbones with all the gentleness I possessed.
“Yes. I love you.” The second time felt even more real, even more necessary. “I love you a lot. So whatever it is you’re hiding… you don’t have to tell me. I don’t need to know if you don’t want to.”
The relief that crossed his face was nearly physical. His shoulders dropped. A shaky breath left him, warm against my wrists. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to my forehead. “I love you, baby.”
He pulled me against his chest. I went willingly, tucking myself into the warmth of him.
After a moment I tipped my head back so I could look into his eyes.
The stars were still above us, bright and endless.
I didn’t bother glancing at them.
I didn’t need a hope star anymore.
My star was right here on earth, and it had a name.
Alexei Morozov.
Two boys met beneath the stars,
and the heavens stitched their hearts together.
The End