Chapter 20
Ash
“...mhhm,” I hummed, phone wedged between my cheek and shoulder as I knocked on the wall inside the rink. “Well, that’s just Dad–he’s like that.”
“I know,” Mom sighed, a twinge of amusement in it. “I miss you, Ashy–you still want to come to Aspen with us this summer, right? I’m booking spa days, and I know you love a deep tissue one after a hard season–might help with your leg.”
Now felt like a historically bad time to tell her my leg was getting a whole different kind of deep tissue massage.
“Yeah, Mom–that sounds good,” I mumbled, dropping my bag to the floor in front of my locker. “I have to get going–”
“Of course–have a great day at practice, honey,” she hummed sweetly, sending me a kiss through the phone. “I’m glad that Mr.Thayer has been working out for you–I can just tell that this is your season, baby.”
The call ended with a few I love yous before tossing my phone in my locker to start getting changed. I wasn’t late by any means, but there was some urgency behind getting changed and out on that ice.
I hadn’t seen Thayer since this morning.
A large pit sat deep in my stomach, replaying every phone call I’d had with my mom over the last two months–every time I lied to her. I tried to ignore it and pretend it was nothing, but that pit got bigger after every call.
This was the first big thing I’d ever lied to her about.
Tightening the strap on my last pad, I looked up and found my magnet. My eyes locked on my man, biting back the smirk on my lips.
He was wearing a hoodie today, and it wasn’t nearly cold enough for that…
But that hickey on his neck was wholly unprofessional.
A snicker bubbled in my nose, the smirk hiding behind my mask as I passed by Thayer and Reed. I dropped my gloved hand, bumping Thayer’s hip.
We were good about keeping our hands to ourselves here, but I liked testing that boundary. I never did anything that would be too obvious, but making Thayer sweat a little was my favorite hobby.
“You could bring him,” Reed said. They were trailing behind me, following me out of the locker room and onto the ice. “I promise I won’t make any jokes about how old he is.”
“I’m good,” Thayer huffed, chuckling under his breath. “It’s not you I’m worried about–he’s a little…”
“Immature?” Reed finished. “I mean, he’s what? 23 or something? The kid has to be at least a little immature–”
“He’s not immature,” Thayer interrupted, offering me an uncomfortable side-eye as I stepped onto the ice.
They were talking about me.
Thayer had told me about telling Reed he was seeing someone my age a few days before, and I made my jokes about that. Those two went on more dates than Thay and I did, and he’d come back a little drunk and far more willing to play with me, but they were close.
They were friends.
Thayer was just trying to make sure I knew he didn’t think I was immature.
Now would be a bad time for him to check his phone–I sent him a few half-naked pictures before I left our place to come here.
“Then what’s the big deal?” Reed asked, only half-paying attention as he gathered his whiteboards and markers. “It’s all hockey team staff, and you said the guy likes hockey–the team will even be there–it’s for charity.”
Ahhh.
The charity hockey banquet.
The team hosted it every year, and this year it was for kids with heart disease. It was always some fancy dinner and stuff, but I usually just went for an hour or two and got drunk off free champagne.
Reed was trying to convince Thay to bring me to that.
“He just wouldn’t be interested–that’s all,” Thay said, dismissing the conversation when Reed blew his whistle, calling us all in.
◆◆◆
“Let me,” Thayer hummed, stopping me from walking out of our room. He took hold of my tie, untying the sloppy knot I’d made and retying it neatly. “Much better.” He smiled, pulling on the tail to bring me in for a quick kiss.
“Thanks,” I whispered, eyes still shut and refusing to leave his bubble just yet.
Thayer backed away first, clearing his throat to get my attention. “I’ll see you there, but–”
“I know, I know–keep my hands to myself,” I sighed, pouting slightly. “Promise me I’ll get to take all that off when we get home?” I asked, gesturing at his suit with a wiggle in my brow.
“I promise.” he smiled, taking a gentle hold of my chin and guiding me closer for one more kiss. “You promise me the same thing, right, baby?”
“Absolutely,” I breathed, a smile stuck on my face.
Begrudgingly, Thayer released my jaw, letting me go.
The team had to be at the event early to meet with some kids and take some pictures with our jerseys over our suits. It was only about an hour or so, but it meant that I couldn’t even ride with Thayer…
Not that I did anyway.
Thayer was so good at making sure I didn’t feel it so much, but being hidden sucked. I never cared enough about going on a date with Callie, but now that the only dates I could have were in our place…
I cared.
We made it work, and Thayer did the best he could, but yeah…Sometimes I really hated it.
Tonight was one of those times.
Standing next to the guys on my team and taking pictures with kids while all their dates were on the other side of the room giggling together–I cared. I cared that even if they knew and if they cared, that Thay would never be standing in that group.
That even if there was no shame around any of this, I was just different from them. I didn’t have a girlfriend who liked going partying and rushing sororities–I had a boyfriend who did the crossword on Sundays and made sure I was in bed by eleven.
And I liked that.
Crowds bugged me, and loud music was awful, but that wasn’t cool for a twenty-one-year-old to think. I was supposed to like flashing lights and thumping music in clubs, but honestly?
I liked being at home with Thayer. I wasn’t upset that we weren’t going to clubs and getting wasted in the middle of the day at Frat parties– I was irritated that I couldn’t even go see a movie with him or get dinner and actually eat it there.
“Kinny!” Carp called out, waving me over to him and a small kid. “Hey, Mattie–this is my friend, Ash. He’s a goalie.”
“Really?” the small child asked, wide-eyed, like I was a superhero. “Why you so small?”
A laugh bubbled out of me before I could actually stop it, surprising Carp enough to flinch. “It’s uh…a lot of padding. I bring the legs, but most of that is padding, so I don’t get hurt,” I explained as kindly as I could.
It was alarming to Carp.
He just kept watching me, expecting some kind of smart-ass comment or irritated look on my face, but I actually like kids. I have cousins this boys' age and was used to talking to them a certain way, but I’d never really have a reason to do so in front of my team.
This was the first year our charity was doing something with kids.
“...and you know–the puck– it can go so fast,” the kid babbled on, holding on to my shoulder while I knelt in front of him, nodding along.
“Very fast,” I confirmed, nodding. “I got hit with one once without the padding and phewww,” I chuckled, shaking my head.
As if the air shifted, my eyes moved on their own, locking on Thayer when he walked in. I couldn’t bite back that smile, just doing my best to keep it under control the best I could, but he was pretty in a suit.
Just sort of wished he hadn’t shaved, but whatever.
“Hey, Mattie, do you want to meet someone?” I asked, waiting for his enthusiastic nod. I looked past him, whistling to get Thayer’s attention and waving him over. “This guy–he’s a real-life NHL goalie.”
“Really?” he asked, jaw dropped.
Thayer came waltzing over, kneeling next to me with a warm smile on his face. “And who are you?” Thay asked, resting a gentle hand on my back, as if it were for stability.
“This is Mattie,” I hummed, taking my chance to look over at him without all the eyes on us. “Mattie wants to be a goalie, and I wanted him to meet my friend who's a big-bad NHL goalie, since I’m not one–”
“Yet,” Thayer interrupted playfully, pinching my back slightly. “Hi, Mattie. I’m Thomas.”
Maybe I couldn’t hold Thayer’s hand or kiss him in public yet, but that was okay for now. I was okay with this because it was temporary–two years at most.
After I graduated, I was registering for the NHL draft. I’d go where they sent me and just pray that it wasn’t too far because once he wasn’t my coach, I never planned to be quiet about us again.
Not to my friend.
My parents.
Strangers would know how proud I was to be dating the biggest and baddest goalie that ever traipsed through the NHL.
“Are you his coach?” Mattie asked Thayer, making me snicker.
Thayer’s hand on my back got stiff– a controlling hold that was telling me to cut it out. I got it together quickly, looking over at Thayer to answer, but he was already looking at me with that same warm smile I loved waking up to every day.
“Best coach I’ve ever had.”