Chapter 33 #2
“Well…at the risk of being insensitive, you don’t seem to enjoy being queen.
And I don’t think Freja or the Nilurae will want you back on the throne after all is said and done.
” I waited for the words to send a chill of dread through me, but they didn’t.
I regretted everything else that had happened, but the thought of handing over the responsibility of the crown to someone else sounded strangely appealing.
“Pretend we’ve done it all. We’ve defeated Callum and Arraya.
The world is ours. What would you want to do? ”
“I’ve…never really thought about it before,” I admitted. My next words felt like sacrilege, but they poured out of me. “I wouldn’t want to stay in Bhorglid. And I don’t think Faste is a place I could be happy either.”
S?ren perked up. “Maybe we could…travel. See the world together.”
“That sounds nice,” I said. The honesty in my words surprised me. “If we found somewhere we really loved, we could settle down. Otherwise, we could just…”
“Keep going.” He twisted me in his arms to face him, then leaned forward to press his forehead to mine, and the sincerity radiating from him made my shoulders relax.
“But you’ve had so few choices in your life.
I don’t want to be another obligation. So be thinking about where you want to go first. Anywhere. I’ll follow you. Just say the word.”
I pulled his mouth down to meet mine. The kiss was slow and languorous, an anchor in the current of my emotions.
“We could decide together. Take turns if we disagree on a final destination.” I brushed our noses together.
“The world will be ours. We can find somewhere safe, where we don’t have to run. And just…”
“Be,” he finished for me. “Just be.”
I relaxed in the cradle of his arms. The exhaustion of the last few days weighed heavy. But tonight, we would sit down with Astrid and make a real plan. The storm raging inside me settled a bit.
“I asked Astrid to grab us both a change of clothes,” he said, nodding to the bag she’d left behind.
I stepped out of his hold to examine the contents. Basic pants and shirts for both of us, including new undergarments as well. Thank the gods. Our room had a tub, but our clothes were beginning to feel unclean.
After setting everything out on the bed, I turned my back to him. “Will you help me with the corset?”
He moved behind me and began to unlace it without speaking. I’d been numb and angry since we arrived at the inn, but the simple twist of his fingers through the laces of my corset, an act of mundane kindness anyone might have granted, brought a lump to my throat.
“Thank you,” I said quietly, twisting my fingers, “for staying with me.”
“I—”
“Please let me finish.” He fell silent, went back to the task at hand.
I watched his reflection in the window above the headboard, grateful to be on the third story of the building.
“I have made many mistakes in my short life. None of them have ever been presented to me as succinctly as they were at the festival.”
I took a shaky breath before I continued. “I’ve lost everything. The crown I fought for. The friends who made me want to fight in the first place. The trust of my people. My home.”
By now his fingers were still, the corset loose around my torso. Cool air crept beneath the fabric of the bodice. “I have been a monster. I am a monster. And selfishly, horribly, I—I am eternally grateful that you are, too.”
“Revna.” His voice was low and hoarse. “I am yours. No one can part me from your side. No matter what you do, I will follow you. When everyone else leaves, I will stay. Always.”
His hands gripped my waist, and I heard the meaning of his words like a whisper. I love you, I love you, I love you.
S?ren tugged on the corset until the laces were undone and set it aside. His fingers brushed along the waistline of my dress. “May I take this off?”
I wasn’t sure what I wanted, whether doing anything other than changing into clean clothes was a good idea. But my body craved him half as much as my soul, and my answer was inevitable. “Yes.”
He pulled the fabric over my head, tossed it to the side with our bags. When he finished his work, I stood bare. I knew I’d savor the memory of this moment forever—naked and vulnerable, exposed and wanting, while he stood behind me still fully clothed.
We barely touched, the only contact his gentle fingertips on my wrists.
“Perhaps the world sees a monster when they look at you,” he whispered, his breath sending shivers down my spine as it caressed the shell of my ear.
“But I see only this. Perfection. A goddess in human form, made for my worship.”
I exhaled a shaky breath. He walked around me and sat down on the edge of the bed before pulling me to stand between his knees. It was easy to believe it when he looked at me like this—like he would shove a knife between his ribs if I only asked.
“Can I show you?” he pleaded. “Can I prove it to you?”
I hesitated. “I don’t know that I deserve it. Not after everything that happened.”
“Fuck what happened.” S?ren was fierce now, and I knew with a certainty my words had brought the Hellbringer to the surface. My heart pounded in my chest, a harmony to the blood rushing through my head. “You are good.”
My body shook and I gasped. His hands slid down to palm my ass, grip the backs of my thighs. “You like that? You like it when I tell you the truth?”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “It isn’t—”
“Do I lie?” The words held an edge of sharpness, a demand so firm I was forced to answer.
I shook my head. One moment, I stood before him.
The next, he’d hoisted me into the air, hands clutching my thighs, and buried his face into the hollow of my throat.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, hanging on for dear life as he kissed and licked and nipped at me.
The fabric of his clothes brushed friction over my breasts as he walked us over to the wall and pressed me up against it.
“S—S?ren,” I managed.
“Hmm?” His answer was muffled against my throat, his lips then trailing softly down to the tops of my breasts.
“I love you.”
He froze, then looked up at me through his lashes. His pupils were blown, the gray of his eyes barely visible but still there. I watched his throat bob. “I love you, too.”
Then his mouth met mine again. The heat was still there, building faster than was controllable, but I found myself surprised that the fire and the secure safety of knowing how he felt seemed to lift each other. One making the other more poignant.
His mouth was warm and soft and, gods, I wanted him. I knew the fabric of his shirt must be wet where I pressed into it, and the thought sent a thrill through me. He loved me, monstrosities and all, and maybe I didn’t deserve it.
But I wanted it. And that would be enough.
I nipped at his lower lip, delighted when he moaned. He twisted us away from the wall and deposited me, laughing, on the bed. My eyes drank him in while he took off his shirt, then his pants, until he stood naked looking down on me.
His gaze lit across every part of me, taking his time.
He ran a palm over his cock absentmindedly, stroking himself while he looked between my breasts and my cunt, like he was trying to decide where to begin.
I stretched, luxuriating in the way his gaze heated, and spread my legs while I ran my hands over my own body.
The predator had emerged. But before he could pounce, I made a decision. Swiftly, I sat up, pushed his meandering hand to the side, and wrapped my mouth around him.
“Fuck.” I don’t think I imagined the way his knees started to buckle. He gripped the bedpost as I sucked, laving him with my tongue. “You’re gorgeous like this.”
His praise made my chest hum contentedly. I hollowed my cheeks and moved faster. S?ren groaned, and I relished the taste of him. But soon, he was placing his palms on my cheeks and pulling me off him. I caught my breath, frowning. “Was it not good?”
A firm hand pushed me onto my back, and he knelt over me, eyes heavy-lidded. “It was too good. I want to make this last, Princess. I can’t do that when I’m watching your lips stretch around my cock.”
“Oh.” I knew he loved me, knew he wanted me, but hearing him say it so succinctly still surprised me. I ran my hands over the planes of his chest, traced a finger over the ridges of his scar. “Well, sometime I want to get you off that way.”
His hand trailed over my stomach, teasing before it fell between my legs. “You never have to.”
“I said I want to,” I managed, one of his fingertips circling my entrance. I squirmed beneath his touch, wanting more, more, more. “I might need some practice, though. I’ve never—”
S?ren interrupted me with a kiss, sliding his finger into me at the same time. My mouth opened in a silent gasp, and his lips brushed my ear when he whispered, “We can practice all you like, Princess.” I heard the smirk in his voice, even as his quiet words turned rough. “My good girl.”
I clenched, and he chuckled, moving back to drink me in again. “You had your turn to make me feel good. Now it’s my turn to make you beg.”