The Fall #6
Clearing his throat, Solomon gave me an understanding expression. “Sometimes, you just have to go with your gut.”
I almost laughed. “That is not how we are programmed, Horseman. If we question, we Fall.”
Looking out into the darkness, I let it wrap around me like a cold embrace. I felt when Serendipity entered the backyard.
Her voice was soft, kind. She should hate me, but she’d been nothing but kind.
“It is a different era now, Raphael.” Her voice sounded immeasurably old at that moment.
She’d lived far more than human lifetimes.
Seen more things than any human should see.
“Humankind is different. Sin is different. Why should Angelkind not evolve too?” she said, echoing the words of her father the last time I’d seen him.
So alike those two, despite being separated by centuries.
“Michael himself gave me a pardon. Were his actions any different to yours, albeit a few millennia too late?” She walked toward me, and sat down on the lap of the Horseman beside me.
“Tell me what happened, before my father and Lucifer fell.”
Swallowing hard, I handed the child back to his father.
Looking at Serendipity, I took my punishment.
I laid it out for her, my role in her suffering.
In the death of her mother and all her kin.
For the first time in my immortal life, I told someone what happened that night.
I spared no details; I didn’t soften my role.
I went there to kill her and while I’d failed at my task, I’d felt guilt about that failure ever since.
She reached over and grabbed my hand, squeezing it softly. “If you had made a different choice, I wouldn’t be here. I know true love now, Raphael, and that in itself is glorious.”
Glorious. Was she right? Was true love the real glory? Had Michael misinterpreted the Plan?
I blinked wildly as the truth of it settled over me.
How could it not be true? Serendipity was happy.
Ace and Lucifer were happy. The Fallen had the love of a woman who was almost Nephilim.
How could this not be his plan when so many loose threads had converged into something that was bright and pure and perfect?
I got to my feet quickly. “I must go. Thank you for your hospitality. Please inform Lucifer that your obligations to me are complete.”
I materialized a world away, in the middle of my Clinic.
Nora screamed. She was standing over a patient who was thankfully unconscious.
I walked toward her and kissed her hard.
I kissed her like I wanted to kiss her weeks ago.
I kissed her like kissing her wasn’t a betrayal of everything I’d ever believed, but rather a celebration of it.
“Nora, what's wrong?” Bray said, moving toward the table quickly. I turned and kissed him too. It wasn’t quite as passionate as when I'd kissed Nora, but it was hard and filled with feelings I didn’t know what to do with.
Bray reared back. “Uh, I don’t think that was Nora.”
The woman in question cleared her throat. “Uh no. Ruhan decided to grace us with his presence once more.” Her tone was stinging, but I could hear the hurt beneath it. I froze the rest of the humans in the room. And then I set my wings free.
Nora’s gasp this time was so loud, it echoed off my chest like a bullet.
“My name is Archangel Raphael. And you are right. I should have done better. I should have kissed you back.” I pointed to the unconscious patient on the table.
“I should have prevented this. But I cannot.” I cleared my throat.
“I cannot prevent the wars. Human nature is not something I can subvert. But the kissing, I can do. Aiding down here, I can do. And I will do more. Because I cannot believe that my role in this world is to stand by and watch humanity suffer. To stand by and suffer myself.”
I lifted Bray’s hands to my wings, and he stroked his hands down my feathers. And it felt good. It felt so fucking good.
“Nora?” he said softly.
“Yes, Bray?” she croaked out.
“Do you think that the plumpy’nut mixture might have gone moldy? Am I having a hallucination right now? Though you think I’d be able to see if I was hallucinating, right? But it still makes more sense than an archangel kissing me and then letting me stroke his wings.”
Nora made a choked noise. “I don’t think it was the paste, Bray. He kissed me too.”
“Did you also like it a little more than was probably appropriate?” Bray asked, and Nora laughed.
“Yes.” She turned to me. “I have a lot of questions.”
I smiled at her. I knew she would. “I am willing to give you answers. I’ve made my decision.” I licked my dry lower lip. “It was not an easy decision to make.”
Finally, her face softened. “I understand.”
“I’m glad one of us understands, because I’m standing here with an inappropriate boner over a man I’ve never even seen. Who has wings? And is kind of biblical. Fuck, I’m going to Hell, aren’t I?”
My lips twitched. “Probably, but I know the guy in charge down there and he’s not as bad as we make him out to be. Besides, I’ll be right there with you.”