37. Georgia
There’s a horse wearing a cowboy hat winking at me. I grimace and stretch my mouth. The tears I’d let fall like Niagara earlier are dry and stuck to my skin like glue.
With a long, drawn-out sigh, I turn on the couch, my back to the door, and shudder as the air kicks on in the pool house.
I don’t have a clue how long it’s been since I stormed out of Derek’s family home, and I feel a mixture of things.
Embarrassment, for one, seeing as I stormed out of there in a fit of rage over what seemed to be a conversation about an outfit, when in reality I stormed out because life felt like it came crashing down on me.
I’m freaking sad, and I’m a little bit turned on, which makes me angry not only at myself, but at Derek too.
“It was real to me. Georgia, you’re real to me. We—we’re something.”
I shudder as his words replay in my mind, a tingle of electricity shooting down my spine, and I groan.
I have got to get it together.
For the first time in my life, I told a man that I love him… Directly after he admitted to lying to me.
“I sure know how to pick ’em, don’t I?” I question aloud, rubbing a hand over my eyes, startling when a new voice chimes in.
“I don't know what that means, but I got a snack for us.” Delilah’s soft voice catches my attention. My breath gets stuck in my throat as the small girl trots over to me from the front door, a small vanilla cupcake in her hands.
She gives me a sweet smile, holding the cupcake out to me. I take it and thank her before eating the entire thing in one bite. Her little brown eyes widen like saucers as she watches me before she replicates my actions with her own cupcake.
We smile at one another's stuffed faces before laughing softly. I chew my cupcake and turn to her, “What’re you doing here, Deli Belly?”
She seems to weigh her options of what to tell me before shrugging and turning her entire body toward me, grabbing my hands with her tiny ones.
“I don’t know what Papá did, but he’s not a mean person…” She trails off, her brows creating a line in her forehead as she chews her bottom lip before nodding. “He’s just a boy, Mamá … They’re dumb.”
I don’t mean for my bark of laughter to be so loud as she holds back a giggle of her own.
“They’re very dumb, girly pop… How about this: we ignore the dumb boys of the world and watch a movie. How does that sound?”
Delilah’s eyes are bright as she agrees, and soon enough, the two of us find ourselves watching a new movie about race cars in bed.
She and I share a small bag of popcorn, laughing and creating small jokes about the movie.
The more time Delilah and I spend together, the more she inspires me not only to be a better person but also to follow my dreams. Whenever I mention designing clothes, her eyes brighten, and if I mention a new piece, she begs to see it.
She tugs at the sleeve of my pajama shirt, her doe eyes round and sparkly as she gives me a worried look.
Without question, I pause the movie and give her my full, undivided attention.
Even though she’s only four, she notices everything.
She’s very inquisitive and is keen on helping others, which is why it doesn’t surprise me one bit when she tries to help her father.
“My papá loves you a lot…” she mumbles, and her words take me back.
Derek loves me?
“I’ve never seen him so happy before. He gets excited when he sees you, like how I get excited when Aggy lets me dress her up.
He waits for you, and when you go to sleep in the car, sometimes I see him look at you.
” She becomes shy as she speaks, ducking her head as a blush creeps across her face, but she presses on, “I know that he did something bad, but please don’t leave us.
I think it’ll hurt him a lot if you do.”
The organ in my chest grows triple.
Please don’t leave us.
I nod, pulling her into my lap, and wait for her to look at me. When she does, a smile breaks out on my face, and I pull her into my chest, cradling her.
If there is one thing that I’ve learned about myself since our marriage began, it’s that I would never ever think about giving this family up.
We may have some issues, and we definitely aren’t doing things in the traditional sense, but two things remain true.
Derek and Delilah are my family, and I love them more than anything.
I kiss the top of her hair. "I'll never leave the two of you, Deli Belly. We’re a family.”
She perks up in my arms and cuddles deeper into my chest. “Mean it?”
“I mean it, Sunshine.”