Chapter 10
TEN
“You can’t keep any of them.”
The Emerald Ward
Dragon Heights, Wyoming
Magic worked in mysterious ways, and the instant I stepped foot into the Emerald Ward, every lizard within a block decided I was the most interesting being they’d ever seen in their lives.
Baby alligators covered my feet. Iguanas waged war for the right to crawl all over me.
A bearded dragon claimed my shoulder, snuggling near Tourmaline and displaying a vibrant rusty-red hue.
Tourmaline clicked and perched on the friendly lizard, settling in to preen.
“Erik, help,” I requested, staring at the sea of lizard bodies writhing around my feet, crawling all over me, and otherwise serving as a second layer of clothes.
It was one thing to collect animals from the rains and another to be one the animals wished to collect.
He laughed at me, but he got out his phone and placed a call. “Hey, Cedrick? Where is the drop-off for bounties in the Emerald Ward? Kinsley has hundreds of baby alligators and other lizards trying to become friends with her.”
After a moment, Erik snickered and reported our location. “I’m pretty sure she attracted every lizard around this block. What happened with the rains?”
I wanted the answer to that question, and I stared at my husband, resisting the urge to tap my foot, afraid of hurting any of the reptiles.
“Ah, I see. Okay. I’ll let her know.” Erik hung up.
“So, apparently, we missed the news announcement, but it’s being suggested that metallic dragons and their kin avoid the Emerald Ward until the collections are done.
The rains were done for a mixed lot of metallic dragons, and it backfired.
The rains are attuned to dragons with metallic heritage, and it’s going either way for if the lizards love or hate the dragon.
It seems you are beloved. In good news, we’re right near the ward line, and Cedrick will bring a van so we can catch your friends.
” Erik sent a text before adding, “You can’t keep any of them. ”
I pointed at the bearded dragon. “Not even this one?”
Erik sighed. “I mean, it is cute, but do you even know how to take care of one?”
“Well, no. But I could learn!”
“I don’t even know if they can be left home without being watched, Kinsley. Why don’t you request the titaniums add it to their menagerie so you can visit? You can make it a condition of visiting Mouthy Asshole and his girlfriend.”
I snickered, aware we’d have to go visit the toad sooner than later so he could try to bite the shit out of me. “I love them, Erik. They’re amazing.”
“Yes, I know you love them. I don’t even mind visiting them, but we will not be bringing them into our home.
If bearded dragons can be left unsupervised for two days or you can reliably find a pet sitter, I’ll consider allowing you to keep the one.
Otherwise, you’re going to have to let the titaniums take care of it. ”
“How are the titanium dragons going to handle this? They’re metallic dragons.” I kept as still as I could, as I had lizards hanging off me. Something crawled on my head, and I sighed. “My hair.”
“It’s another bearded dragon,” Erik reported.
“It is a white one, and it’s making a nest for itself.
I might even allow you to keep two bearded dragons if they can share the same space without killing each other.
But you would have to make time to play with them every day, supervise them outside of their cage, and so on. ”
As we wanted the kittens to earn their bounties for their hoards, we would have custody of them until it was time to head off to dinner, when my parents would earn their keep and test keeping our babies overnight.
Garnet, in her wisp form, mewed and bobbed around, investigating the gathering of lizards.
“We could start a mini menagerie, and when we go out of town, we can impose on our families and make them watch our furred, feathered, and scaled children. Maybe Garnet and Citrine would like to watch our new pets.”
Citrine, who remained in her kitten form, stuck close to her beloved human and rode on his shoulder, observing the consequences of my presence with interest.
Erik petted his little girl. “I will acknowledge she’s not really afraid of them, which is better than I expected. They were enough to startle me, and I’m not a sweet little baby.”
In his family’s world, he would always be a sweet little baby, but I displayed a scrap of mercy and didn’t remind him of that. “We need to open a bounty account for Citrine, and due to the situation, we’ll split the money we earn today evenly. Tourmaline needs an account, too.”
“Whatever makes you happy,” Erik replied, and he turned, chuckling at the van coming up the road. “Hopefully that’s Cedrick.”
Sure enough, the vehicle stopped and the titanium dragon got out, waving to us. “This’ll be easy. They like me, too, so I can just come over and lure them into carry containers for the trip to the menagerie. We’ll tally them up after we’ve transported them all.”
“Are we able to adopt two bearded dragons?” I asked.
“Sure. They’re originally from Australia, and we’ll make a breeding program to replace the ones that are adopted.” Opening the side door, he pulled out a rather large plastic bin with holes drilled into the side. “We’ll start with the alligators, as those will be the easiest.”
“Want me to try to catch them while you count as we put them in?” Erik cracked his knuckles, eyeing the swarm of critters around my feet. “It’s worth a shot and might save you some work later.”
“Try not to lose a finger to a tiny predator,” Cedrick replied.
“If I lose a finger to one of these guys, I deserve to be mocked for the rest of my life.” Without any evidence of fear, Erik went to work snatching baby alligators, grabbing them by the body before handing them over to Cedrick, who placed them in the tub.
He maintained ownership of his fingers, although he earned a nip or two for daring to remove them from my presence.
I laughed every time he yelped, and his kitten tossed her head, turned her ears back, and huffed over his lack of grace. With nothing else to do, I managed to get my phone and record one such incident, which I would watch over and over while chortling.
Fortunately for us, Cedrick had come prepared, and he had large, squat tubs aplenty.
Excluding the moth eggs, the haul proved to be my largest to date with the titanium dragon-kin capturing several thousand alligators, several hundred iguana, sixty bearded dragons, and a handful of other species of lizards.
The two lizards I liked went into a small tub together, which Cedrick flagged as for us if they passed their health checks and could be turned into pets.
We would find out in a few weeks, as the reptiles slated to be returned to the wild had top priority for examination while our bearded dragons would enjoy luxury accommodations in the titanium menagerie until their evaluation.
“If we can keep them, will you help us set up their habitat and teach us how to care for them?” Erik asked.
“Absolutely. Now that you’ve been rescued, please do not go back into the Emerald Ward for a few days, Kinsley. Let some of the other bounty hunters catch some lizards.”
I laughed, nodded, and headed for my SUV. “I’m going home and taking a shower because I’m absolutely disgusting. My plans for today are all on hold until I have a chance to clean up. Erik, put a towel over the passenger seat so I don’t destroy my poor baby.”
My husband laughed and went to do as told.
“Now I’m grateful for your foresight. Honestly, I thought it was a little weird to buy new beach towels for each of our vehicles, but now it makes sense.
You’ll have to wash those clothes numerous times to get them clean, but at least the vehicle will be fine. ”
I nodded and followed after him, waiting until he had the towel in place to ease into the vehicle, leaving him to handle taking care of our kittens and securing Tourmaline’s nest for the trip home. “Drive safe, Cedrick!”
“I will. I value my life, and my father would put some serious thought into killing me if I injure any of the reptiles in my care. Someone from my family will be over to bring your checks tonight, and I’ll make sure Citrine and Tourmaline have their own accounts.
Are you sure you want to do an equal split, Kinsley? ”
“Yep. It’s not their fault I hogged all the reptiles. You take care of my new babies, and if we can’t keep them, I will be heartbroken.”
“I’ll even tell my father we should help you set up an excellent habitat for them in your house as compensation for you keeping Mouthy Asshole and his girlfriend happy. Can we get you to come over next week, by the way?”
“You can. Just text me when you want us to come over and have mashed potatoes and fried chicken ready. That should tame most in our household.”
Erik sighed, got behind the wheel, and shook his head. Cedrick got into his van, which spared us from having to dance around ending the conversation and leaving. “Fried chicken and mashed potatoes, Kinsley?”
“The kittens have to be properly fed, and I like fried chicken.”
“I guess it’s a good thing I’ll eat the fried chicken and the mashed potatoes, but you could have given us some variety.”
“But why?”
“Because life doesn’t revolve around mashed potatoes.”
Both our carbunclo hissed, and even Tourmaline protested in clicks and high-pitched noises.
“Don’t worry, babies. I know what you need, and you need potatoes. We’ll teach your daddy he’s wrong through going out for fast food potatoes tomorrow,” I told our kittens, refusing to meet Erik’s gaze. “Just get us home before this mess gets through the towel and destroys my SUV.”
“Don’t forget to summon your parents, because after you’re cleaned up, we’re still going on our dinner date.”