Chapter 15
Riley
“THERE’S NOTHING IN THE WORLD THAT FEELS MORE RIGHT.”
About an hour ago, Creed had Collins settle in next to me before pulling up a chair and kicking his feet up on the end of the bed to relax next to us.
The nurse had come in to take my vitals while glaring at Creed but didn’t say a word about Collins curled up next to me sleeping.
She had actually checked over her, too, before leaving the room, letting me know she’d be bringing another round of antibiotics soon.
Dr. Munn had come in shortly after to go over each of my injuries.
The stab wounds to my thigh had missed any major arteries but did slice clean through my muscle.
He’d said with daily movement and no heavy lifting, I should be okay and heal properly.
The burn scars from the rope on my wrists were tender to the touch but would also heal with minimal scarring.
His main concerns were the tremors in my hands, mobility of my right arm, and my ear.
When he removed the bandage to check the gunshot wound, he also informed me that the close range of the blast not only took off half of my right ear, but the bullet had grazed my skull, burning the flesh there.
My hearing is a little muffled, but we won’t know the extent of the damage until I’ve fully healed.
Dr. Munn went over the details of my shoulder injury thoroughly, though. While I didn’t understand some of what he was saying, I got the jist of it.
I was shot near my brachial plexus, and the bullet was lodged in the muscle; it was likely the cause of the sepsis. The bullet had also done damage to my radial nerve, which explained my inability to make a fist or even grip a pencil.
Before he left and I could panic, he’d put in an order for physical and occupational therapy to see me to establish a care plan. I’m choosing to not think about it right now because I think I can only handle so much for one day.
That was about an hour ago, right before I dozed off.
My head itches where the bandage covers my ear, and I try reaching the spot with my opposite hand when I feel where they shaved my head.
I was so focused on the fact that I only had half of an ear that I hadn’t paid much attention to it before.
Everything from the nape of my neck up to just before my crown on the right side is gone.
There’s gauze covering most of it, and the skin beneath feels swollen and angry.
“It looked worse before I fixed it,” Creed murmurs, his voice low as he reaches over and gently pats around the bandage, alleviating the itch. “They had just taken little chunks here and there. I wasn’t about to let you walk around with an uneven haircut, baby.”
I snort at his ridiculous reasoning, but I feel grateful nonetheless. “You did that for me?”
“Of course.” He smiles, resting his hand on my thigh. “You’re my boy. I was in here taking care of you as much as I was in Collins’ room with her.”
That surprises me. Creed’s always been a caretaker, though I felt that shift move from me to her when she came into our lives. I was okay with that and wouldn’t have it any other way. “Why would you leave her for me? Was she alone while you were in here? “
He just rolls his eyes and pats my leg like I’m just talking nonsense.
“One, she wasn’t alone, don’t worry. Everyone’s been on rotation between Asher, Blair, Bear, and Ayla.
They’ve been with her when I’m not. I wanted to get the two of you in a room together, but they had you in isolation while your body was fighting infection. ”
His thumb circles lazily where his hand rests on my thigh, and I wish my arm wasn’t tied to my side so I could hold it. Creed tracks my gaze and smirks. Like he’s read my thoughts, he leans forward and laces his fingers over the tops of mine where they rest against my abdomen.
He nods to Collins, snuggled up and tucked into my side.
“She would’ve had my balls if I didn’t see you.
Not that I wouldn’t have, anyway. But it’s what she wanted, too.
” He shakes his head. “She was fucking pissed that I didn’t bring her in here sooner, you know?
You’re the first person she thought of when she came out of her dissociative state. ”
“I-I was?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m…sorry.”
He fixes me with a puzzled look. “Why?”
My face heats. “Because you two are…together.”
He stares at me, looking a little dumbfounded for a second. “And you’re not?”
“I—not what?” I ask, sounding every bit as dumb as I feel.
“Riley,” he deadpans with a look that says really, man?
“You’re every bit a part of this relationship as me and Collins, if that’s what you choose.
Collins chose me, but she also chose you.
” He gets that playful look in his eyes and gently squeezes my fingers.
“I chose you right along with her, and there’s nothing in the world that feels more right than that. ”
My heart skips a beat, stops, then flutters back to life at his words. They’ve done nothing but reassure me from the moment I woke up, but Creed’s words on this specific topic bat away some of my insecurities about us.
I’ve fought to feel worthy of love my whole life, and it’s hard to break the habit. I don’t want to fight what Creed, Collins and I have because I don’t want to lose it. Lose them.
I press the button to dispense the pain meds in my IV and lay my head back down on the pillow, closing my eyes with a smile on my face. After a few minutes, just before I doze off, I murmur, “It does feel right, doesn’t it?”
Creed’s heady chuckle is the last thing I hear before sleep claims me.
“Collins!” I wake with a jolt, panic seizing me and causing my body to break out in a cold sweat. I look around the room, searching frantically for her but come up empty when I realize she’s no longer by my side.
My nightmare had felt so real that being here in the hospital room is what feels like a dream.
“Collins! Creed!?” I call out their names, terrified something has happened to them.
Whipping off the blanket that covers my lap, I swing my legs over the edge of the bed to search for them, but a blinding pain shoots up my right thigh, and an alarm starts blaring throughout the room. I’m frozen to the spot, afraid to move my body again.
All at once, Collins pokes her head out of my en suite bathroom, her eyes wide as she shuffles over to me in her fuzzy slippers. A nurse comes in to turn off the alarm just before Creed barges into the room with his arms full of snacks and drinks, eyes looking a little crazed.
“What’s wrong?”
“What’s happened?” Creed and Collins rush out at the same time when they each reach me.
I take a deep breath through my nose to get through the pain throbbing in my leg, my shoulder, and the burning sensation radiating in my trembling hand.
I swallow, feeling ridiculous. “Nightmare,” I whisper roughly. “When I woke up, my mind had convinced me that something had happened to you two and…I couldn’t find you.”
They each look me over, ignoring the nurse at their backs and checking me for further injury with entirely too much sympathy and pity that it makes me feel like a fool for getting so upset.
“I’m sorry we weren’t here, Ri. You were napping, so I slipped out to find you two snacks that didn’t taste like shi—cardboard. ”
“Bathroom,” is all Collins says with a blush creeping up her cheeks.
Seeing that they’re both here and okay has me sighing in relief.
I look at the nurse, who’s moved to stand at the foot of the bed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to set the alarms off.”
She waves me off with a kind smile. “It was just a precaution since Dr. Munn doesn’t want you moving about on your own just yet. Therapy will be in later today to do an assessment though. You need help getting settled back into bed, Mr. Graves?”
“Please.” I nod.
With the help of Creed—since he wouldn’t let Collins lift a finger—he and the nurse get me situated in bed with the head raised. She leaves with the promise of returning with my last round of antibiotics in a few hours.
Collins climbs in next to me on the bed and lets out this happy little squeak of excitement when Creed pulls a giant bag of M the smell of it has me salivating. Peanut butter and banana milkshake.
“It’s packed with protein and vitamins and some other healthy shit to help you get your strength back,” Creed informs me as I put the straw to my lips.
“Fuuuuck yes,” I practically moan into the cup when I take the first sip.
Creed makes a noise in the back of his throat, and when I look at him, his eyes have darkened and they’re trained on my lips.
A fierce blush washes over me, and I take another sip to try and mask it.
Creed has always been a sucker for affection and eye contact, and I had come to crave the way he started looking at me months ago.
Collins tears into the M&M’s, offering a small handful to me before grabbing her own. Creed’s phone buzzes and he pulls it from his pocket, reading the message.
“Shit,” he curses, swiping a hand through his messy black hair.
“What is it?” I ask, chewing a mouthful of candy.
“Cort just emailed the whole band. While you were out, we had to keep the wheels moving and search for a new manager. Apparently, the meeting with Bear and Blair went really well. Now he needs me to come in to finalize the paperwork needed to hire the guy.”
“Oh?” I knew we’d need to hire a new one eventually, Creed wasn’t kidding. They had to move and they moved fast.
“Yup,” he confirms, popping the p. “We’ll need your signature, too, but he can wait.” He shrugs like pissing off our record label is no big deal. “His name is Fletcher McGowan and he’s solid, according to Bear. Blair agrees but also said that he’s—and I quote—“Ten out of ten, daddy material.”
I can’t stop the laughter that bursts from my lips. Collins nearly chokes on her own cookies and cream shake as her whole body jolts. Creed joins in on the laughter with such genuine joy on his face that it makes my belly swoop at the sight.
“Oh really?” she muses, feeding me a piece of candy. “I wonder what Asher thinks about that little assessment.”
Creed’s brow furrows. “Why would Asher care about that?”
Collins gives him a knowing look before her eyes swing back to me. I feel just as clueless as Creed before a thought hits me.
“Are they…?”
Collins bites her lip, a soft blush creeping over her cheeks as she shrugs her shoulders. Creed laughs, but then he stands and starts to pace.
“Asher and Blair?” He barks another laugh, brushing a hand over his jaw. “I mean I know Blair’s got it bad for him, but Asher’s straight.” He cuts a look at Collins. “Right?”
Collins just shrugs again before getting up and shuffling over to where Creed stands, looking like his flabbers have been fully gasted. She loops her arms around his waist and pecks a sweet kiss directly over his heart. Looking up at him, her voice is soft when she speaks.
“Whatever they are, it puts some light and life into Asher’s eyes again.
” He looks down at her and smiles warmly, enraptured by her words.
“You know he’ll tell you if you really want to know, but just let them be.
I feel like I just got my brother back, and not just the carefully polished shell of him.
It’s all of him, Creed. They need each other. ”
He kisses her nose then looks at me. “Like we need us?”
Collins turns in Creed’s arms and her eyes meet mine, too. Pulling Creed along with her, she makes her way back over to me until she’s a whisper away from my lips, Creed’s face smooshed amusingly up next to hers.
“Like we need us,” she repeats like it’s a mantra. In perfect sync, three pairs of lips meet in one slow, sensual kiss that melts a few more of my worries away.
The truth is, I don’t feel worthy of their love.
Honestly, I feel more broken than whole after everything Collins and I went through.
I have a feeling I’m going to need more than just physical therapy before I feel any semblance of ‘okay’ again.
But I want to love them the way that I so desperately long to.
I’ll spend every day proving to them that my heart will always be a safe place for their love to grow.
I just hope I don’t fuck it all up.