32. Chapter Thirty Two
I wake up riddled with anxiety. Initiation day is finally here. After training and the activities that followed after, Sonny insisted on taking me home. But instead of going back there, I got him to drop me off at Pinks’.
Insisting, with a heavy threat or two, that I would be okay with Shelly, he refused to leave until I was done practising to drop me home. He muttered something about it being his job to fulfil his duties. I didn’t bother to try to decipher what he meant as I took full advantage of my practice time.
Shelly directed me to one of the back rooms. It was obvious it's used for more of the discreet private parties. A bed that seems to be the size of two kings pushed together took up one wall. It looked out over a couch that sits in front of a pole in the corner of the room. An open bathroom was set in the other corner of the room and I made a note to ask Shelly to rent the room for a night just so I can take a shower in here.
I set up my music in the Bluetooth speakers connected to the room and my song choice belted out. I couldn’t help but smile as I walked over to the pole. It didn't take me long before I was rehearsing the routine that came naturally to me. I did throw in a couple of pole tricks this time that I eyed a couple of the girls doing out in the main room. It shocked me at just how hard the moves are. I take my hat off to them. The strength that is required to dance pole is no joke.
By the time I was done, I was utterly exhausted. My bones felt like they were made of jelly as I walked out of the room to where Sonny was waiting at the bar. I took him in at that moment, watching as he talked animatedly to one of the servers. It's obvious they have been stuck with him for a while now by the impatient look they had on their faces and the way they keep trying to excuse themselves.
I walked over towards Sonny, tapping him on the shoulder to take his attention away from the bloke. He looked at me with relief as he sauntered away.
I chuckle at the memory from last night. Sonny isn’t for everyone. His quirks are definitely a required taste that’s for sure.
I spend the entire day filled with the same anxious feeling I woke up with. It only seems to get worse as the day goes on.
“Hey baby cakes, what’s got you so gloomy?” Maxie asks as she slides in beside me at the lunch table.
I groan, smacking my face into my hands, “The initiation tonight.”
“Nerves got you babe?” she asks as she takes a bite of her mac and cheese. I don’t bother to even look at the plate Dacre forced me to grab. He didn’t care that I didn’t have an appetite for food. While I appreciate his concern for my health, the thought of anything being in my mouth makes me want to chuck.
“They do. I just can’t believe I have to walk out onto that stage in lace and fucking dance for the whole club.” I shake my head.
“It's a right of passage for us, Australia,” Rippy snips. I look up and blink back at the glare she is giving me. Mainly at the spot where Maxie’s arm is touching mine. It hasn’t escaped my notice the way Rippy looks at her. She couldn’t be any more obvious but it seems Maxie is none the wiser. Shit, even blind Freddy could see the heat in Rippy’s eyes every time she looks in Maxie’s direction.
“Rippy’s right. The older girls were never accepted in the Thunderbirds until your Dad took over. Shelly told us that even just to be an old lady they had to be sexed in.” Brandy shivers and Jen who sits next to her follows the sentiment.
“Sexed in? What does that mean?”
Brandy looks at each of the girls for a moment, taking a deep breath before she looks back at me. Dread instantly fills me and I know whatever she’s about to tell me is going to make me even more sick than I already feel.
“The women were required to be passed around each member of the Thunderbirds. The President and leadership team was always left for last.”
“Oh god,” I murmur, looking at each of the girls in horror.
Jan nods, “ We were told stories from those days. The women were never the same. They say the leadership was especially brutal with their… practices.”
“When your Dad took over and saved a heap of women, it was one of the first things they sought to change. They needed a way to take control of their sexuality again.”
I nod my head as Maxie tries to reassure me but it doesn’t do much. The thought of this being something I was born into fills me with dread. Women were seen as nothing but a hole to fill to these vile creatures. My heart aches as I think of them. Of how they are now. Of how they survived it.
“The women came together and decided if they were going to be initiated in, they wanted something that suited them. None of them were interested in the initiation the males go through so they came up with doing an initiation dance. It was a way to take back control of their bodies. A way to control their fate,” Brandy says with a smile.
“That, and Shelly was a dancer before she was trafficked,” Maxie adds, holding up her fork.
“A fucking good one at that,” Rippy says as she bites into her apple. The four of us laugh, helping to brighten the doom of our conversation. Just when I seem to think I have gotten to the depths of the depravity of the Thunderbirds’ history, I seem to get caught at each turn. It does do something to settle my wandering thoughts at knowing my father has changed a lot of the said history.
Anxiety is a killer though and I can’t help but think that maybe we haven't escaped these issues entirely.
I take a sigh of breath the moment the last bell of the day rings. I throw my stuff into my bag, not giving a single fuck about any bent pages. I know Grace would kill me at my mistreatment of books but these are for knowledge, not smut.
Nicky calls out after me as I rush out of the room. I don’t look back. The clock already feels like a ticking time bomb over my head.
Rhodes is already waiting for me as I burst out of the front doors. I roll my eyes at the hoard of girls already flocked around his black mustang. I scoffed my eyes at him the moment I saw the car. It may be pretty but it's got nothing on the R8 Mike has back home. Give me that car any day of the week.
My brother finally looks up at me, instantly dismissing the now very disappointed women as Jethro growls making them all scatter.
I don’t bother acknowledging either Wyatt or Jethro as I throw my bag in the footwell of the passenger side. Or what I thought was the passenger side, groaning and blurting every single explicit word that comes to mind as I see the pedals and steering wheel. I throw my bag into the passenger side, flipping off Rhodes, Jethro and Wyatt who are all laughing at my expense as I storm around the other side of the car.
I fall into the car, slamming the door before taking a deep breath to centre myself.
Rhodes doesn’t say anything as he finally gets in the car after saying goodbye to his fan club.
It's either he is able to tell by the expression on my face that I’m not in the mood for any of his bullshit or he is smarter than I pegged him for, but he stays silent for the entire drive.
He pulls up at the house but I don’t get out of the car. The moment I do, I know the rest of the night will be chaos and I need a moment to breathe.
“Are you alright Scar?” Rhodes asks quietly.
“No,” I say honestly, “but I will be. I just need this night done.”
Rhodes nods as I turn to look at him, “To be honest, I’m not looking forward to it either. I love you but the thought of you wearing lingerie dancing on a stage gives me hives. I might also vomit, to be frank.”
I chuckle at the honestly but I’m thankful for it. It also helps to take some of the pressure off my shoulders knowing I’m not the only one not looking forward to it.
“I think Dad has already researched therapists for himself,” he says with a chuckle.
My mouth drops, “Fuck, I forgot that he is going to be there.”
Nope. Nup. There is no way I’m getting on that stage if he is in the crowd.
“He’s going to have to turn his back and stand in a corner or something.” I shiver.
“Don’t you worry, I will be there right beside him.”
We pull up to Pinks’ and it's already packed. I thank my lucky stars that we are with my father, as the crowd parts to make way for him and Mum who are holding hands. It still feels so weird to see her with a man, let alone the man who is my dad. I had always just thought she wasn’t ready to move on but really, she was always just waiting to return to him. Feels like some kind of tragic love story.
I smile even as I pass the mildly familiar faces in the crowd, only spotting a few I remember from Church the other night.
I feel relieved as I spot Shelly who is already making a beeline for me. The excitement is palpable on her face.
“Hello, my darling, we don’t have much time. You need to get backstage and get ready.” Shelly grabs both mine and my Mum’s hands and pulls us through the crowd. She doesn’t bother acknowledging my father or Rhodes as she pushes her way through the masses.
The dressing room is just as packed as when we walked in. I swear each direction I look I spot another naked female body part, some only partially covered by scraps of lace.
Shelly rushes me over to a vacant chair at the vanity that spans the entirety of the wall,
“You sit here my darling,” she says forcing me into the chair as she frantically looks around the room, “Brandy! Brandy! Well, wherever Brandy is…” Shelly says before she is interrupted by a frazzled Brandy.
“I’m here, don’t get your panties in a twist,” she says as she dumps the bags she was carrying on the table in front of me. My eyes widen as makeup pallets and hair tools fall from the bags. Good god, what have I gotten myself into ?
Shelly takes a sigh of relief as she steps behind me and puts her hands on my shoulders, “Brandy is going to take care of your hair and make up. Is customary that the last girl initiated helps the next girl get ready.”
I nod at her words as I turn to look at Brandy who is smiling at me with a cheeky look on her face, “Don’t you worry sweet pea, those stupid boys won't know what hit them once I’m done with you.”
After what feels like every single product known to man applied to my face and hair, Brandy finally steps away from me. If I don’t see another can of hairspray for the rest of my life, it will still be too soon.
“You look beautiful, Scar,” Brandy says as she pulls her hands up to her chin. A proud look donning her face as she admires me.
I finally turn my head and look in the mirror. Brandy refused when I asked to watch, something about wanting it to be a surprise. My hair hangs in perfect curls down my back. The different blonde shades seem to pop through each twist.
My eyes are dark and smoky but not overdone with my lips in a similar dark colour. I can’t help the smile that overcomes me.
Brandy comes to stand behind me, patiently waiting for a response.
“I think it's time to ruin some men’s lives.” The entire room erupts with cat calls and whoops, each sound helping fuel my ego.
I pull the zipper of the boots up, taking a breath as I stand to my full height. Even though I have been practising in them every night, I still feel like a newborn foal walking for the first time as I get used to being this high again.
My eyes widen in surprise as I take in my appearance. The last time I was in my costume, I had my hair in a messy top knot, but now that my hair and make-up is done, I'm generally shocked at my appearance. I’m not normally one to toot my own horn but god fucking damn, I look hot as fuck.
I grab my phone out of the pocket of my discarded jeans and take a couple of selfies, instantly sending them to both Noah and Grace. I go to set down my phone but pings make me pick it back up again.
GRACE
THAT’S MY FUCKING BITCH
GRACE
If I wasn’t straight, I would be wifing you up.
NOAH
Nope. Get a fucking robe or something.
Absolutely not. Grace, do you have one of those douchebags’ numbers? There’s no fucking way you are going on stage in that.
SCARLETT
Calm down, Dad. You should have seen some of the other options I was given. This was the safest. Not only that but I know just how much it will piss those boys off.
NOAH
Now that you have said that, please go and destroy their lives. Maybe collect their balls on those heels and wear them as a lucky charm.
SCARLETT
Blood thirsty, I love it
GRACE
I sometimes question why I’m friends with you two some days.
NOAH
Aw you love us. You know your life would be boring without us.
GRACE
True. Knock ‘em dead Scar. I want full reports tomorrow.
Or whenever the fuck our time zones aren’t being cunts. I miss you.
NOAH
I miss you too. It's not the same without you.
SCARLETT
Don’t make me cry. Brandy spent an hour on this face and I don’t intend on spending a second longer in that god forbidden chair.
But I miss you both more than you can imagine xo
Maxie is the first to spot me as I walk out of the dressing room. Her eyebrows raise and she lets out a low wolf whistle.
“Yes, mama! That’s what I’m talking about. I knew there was a baddie under all that goody two shoes exterior.”
Rippy grunts as she crosses her arms over her chest, not bothering to comment.
Jen twirls her finger around in circles so I follow suit, giving a very unsteady spin before facing the girls again.
Jen nods her head, “I can’t wait to see the way those boys' brains melt when they see you.”
Brandy chuckles, “Come on, let’s go knock them dead.”
I stand behind the curtain that leads out to the stage. If I thought I was nervous before, it has nothing on the jitters I feel now. I grab my hand to stop it from shaking but it’s no use. I will myself to take a few deep breaths before opening my eyes again.
I peek my head out far enough that I’m still hidden but enough that I can see the crowd. I instantly find Rhodes, Wyatt and Jethro. It's obvious by just how uncomfortable Rhodes is as he looks around the rooms in an attempt to escape. When I find my father, he looks very much the same. I watch him throw back two shots of brown liquor, swallowing hard as he looks up at the stage and grimaces.
It doesn’t take me long before I find Nicky, Sonny, Pike, Dacre and, to my disgust, Dawson. They are sitting on the couch right at the end of the stage. I couldn’t have asked for a better spot for them to be sitting, especially with what I have in store for them.
Dawson sits beside them but the distance is obvious between them. Dawson’s arms are crossed over his chest and it looks like he would rather be anywhere but here.
Something the both of us can actually agree on right now. Sonny looks like a kid at a candy store and all his dreams are about to come true.
Pike and Nicky are deep in conversation by the serious looks on their faces. Lastly, my eyes fall on Dacre and to my surprise, he’s looking right back at me. I can feel the heat in his eyes as he looks up and down my body. He catches his lip between his teeth and I instantly clench my thighs together.
Damn him for looking so goddamn delicious. He leans back on the couch, spreading his thighs apart and I have to reinforce my knees so they don’t collapse from under me. He looks like a complete fuckboy right now and I’m utterly at his mercy.
His finger turns in the slightest of motion and just like a string puppet, I turn giving him a full 360 view. His eyes darken as ours meet again.
‘ Fucking perfection, ’ he mouths and my cheeks heat. I’ve never seen Dacre this bold before. My sweet boy seems to have turned devilish but, shit, am I here for it!
“Ladies and Gentlemen, do we have a surprise in store for you tonight,” the DJ says as the current song gets drowned out, “it's time for one of our own to initiate. Now I want you to give a Thunderbirds welcome to our one and only Scarlett Crux! ”
The entire club erupts in applause and hoots, the sounds of feet thumping deafening before my song starts to play and the chaos dies down.
Sugar by Sleep Token rings out over the speakers. The smooth and sultry sounds give me the perfect entrance as I slowly walk out onto the stage. The crowd cheers around me but I keep my eyes locked in on Dacre as I slowly walk down the runway. I eventually start letting my hands roam my body, teasing the audience as I go.
I stop half way down before dropping to my knees. I slide my hands down the stage, arching my back before sliding back into a kneeling position.
My eyes leave Dacre’s whose stare feels like molten lava and find Pike. His posture is stiff and I can’t help the quirk of my lips as I catch the slight tent to his jeans.
I let my hands trail up my body, grazing my lace covered cunt which causes the crowd to holler but I drown them out. Pike’s eyes zone in on every inch of my body.
It's almost as though I can feel each spot they zone in on. I let my head drop back as I reach my tits cupping them and biting my lip. I hear moans and a muffled “for fuck’s sake” but I pay it no mind.
I eventually let my hands drop back to the stage until I’m on all fours and zeroing on my next target, Dawson.
His eyes are wide, and I swear there’s a spot of drool in the corner of his mouth.
Slowly I begin crawling to him, letting my hips sway. As I reach the end of the stage, I sit back on my legs and let a devious smile turn my lips. I swing my legs around before slowly lowering myself off the stage. I thank the pleasers I’m wearing for the additional height to do it with an ounce of grace.
I take the two steps towards Dawson, forcing him back into his seat before crawling into his lap. His hands instantly go to my hips, his grip tightening to the point of pain as I slowly roll my body against him.
I see the fight leave his body. The desperation for me to stay exactly where I am prevalent in his eyes but after his asshole tendencies this past week, he doesn’t stand a chance. I give him a quirk of my lips before pushing off him and turning around. I grip the stage before shaking my ass in his face. The guys all laugh at his expense. I turn around for one last look and blow him a teasing kiss before swinging my legs back up on stage.
I walk quicker towards the pole just as the beat starts to ramp up and right at the crest, I launch at the pole, swinging my body around before hooking my knee in and allowing my body to spin.
My body takes complete control, like I become one with the music as it sounds through the club. Every other noise drowns out until it's just me and the pole. I dance until the final moment, slowing down as I face towards the front of the room again. I drop back down onto my knees and let my head fall back just as the final tones ring out. My breath comes out in pants as I allow the adrenaline to seep from my body.
I lift my head when the crowd erupts in a cheer. I can’t help the smile and the following giggle that escapes me. Brandy, Maxie and Jen are standing on a nearby chair hooting and screaming my name.
Rhodes looks like he's going to be sick but grimaces as he claps. Wyatt and Jethro are both standing and cheering and I can’t help but chuckle at the look on Wyatt’s face. The guy is way too excited .
I finally look down at Pike, Nicky, Dacre, Sonny and Dawson. The former four are all standing cheering and calling my name but the latter sits stock still in his seat. A mix of emotions running over his face. Desire, disbelief and fear all mixed together in a face that looks both constipated and turned on. I send him a wink which he frowns at before I stand and bow to the crowd before turning and exiting the stage.