Chapter 16
Chapter Sixteen
Allora
If they got you, that means I’m already dead…
Sleep doesn’t come easily for the rest of the night, and I toss and turn until around six thirty when I finally give up.
I shower, get dressed for the day, do my hair, and even put on a little makeup.
I don’t know why I feel like I need to do something normal, but I want to feel pretty.
Whether it’s for myself, for Landon, or for some more deep-seated reason doesn’t matter—it feels right in the moment.
However, when I walk into the kitchen, Landon does a double take.
“Good morning,” I say slowly.
Our eyes meet and his are filled with…heat?
That seems illogical since he turned me down the other night, but I know men, and his expression tells a completely different story than his actions did.
“Couldn’t sleep?” he asks quietly.
“Not really, no.”
“You look…nice.”
“Thank you. I thought it was time I put a little effort in that department. I always did before and I’m not going to let this experience change a fundamental part of my personality.”
“You shouldn’t,” he agrees.
“Do we have a game plan for today?”
“We’re going to pack our stuff, both for the next few days and for Denver, and then we’re going to headquarters. Once we get there, we’ll figure out what’s next. Chances are, we’re going to get out of town. Then fly to Denver from wherever we end up.”
“Okay.” I’m learning not to question the process. This is his job and I have to trust that he knows how to do it. “Should I let my dad know we’re leaving?”
He hesitates. “No. The fewer people who know where we are, the better. People talk, even if they don’t mean any harm.
He says something in front of a prospect, the kid mentions it to his grandma, she tells her knitting club, and then it turns out that someone in her knitting club is related to the bad guy. ”
I wrinkle my nose. “Well, that sucks. Poor imaginary grandma.”
We chuckle.
“I’m actually done packing. I did it last night. A big suitcase and a carryon with my camera and equipment. Plus my oversized bag for travel. After my shower, I even packed my toiletries, so I’m ready to go when you are.”
“Let’s make breakfast and then we’ll get out of here.”
So that’s what we do.
The mood between us has shifted again. As if last night’s brush with danger somehow softened my memory of his rejection and we’re back on an even keel.
I’m aware that there’s an element of dependency to our relationship.
He’s my protector and essentially the only reason I’m still alive.
Or not a sex slave to some kinky billionaire on the other side of the world.
I have to trust him—there’s no other choice for me at this point, because my father’s club will never be an option—and being on the outs with Landon just felt wrong.
Especially after what he said about him being dead if they got to me.
Just thinking about it makes my insides flutter with…
something I’m afraid to put a label on. Butterflies should be reserved for a guy you really like.
And I do. But I’m conflicted about the level of attraction.
Is it just sex, a way for me to get back on the horse, so to speak?
Or is there more to it and I’m just too messed up right now to recognize it for what it is?
“Since we had bacon and eggs last night, want to do pancakes?” he asks, startling me back to the present.
“You make pancakes?” I ask, following him into the kitchen.
“I do. Don’t you?”
“Not at home, usually.”
“I actually make protein pancakes, because they balance the carbs. Better for us in general, but also good for me considering my normal workout routine.”
“Have I kept you from working out?” I ask, turning on his coffee machine.
“Yes, but that’s part of the assignment. It’s not a big deal. I did a hundred pushups and a hundred crunches when I woke up. Not my usual level of intensity, but any movement is good.”
“I don’t work out,” I admit. “I do yoga, but I haven’t done that since…I’ve been here.”
“It’s okay to give yourself time to heal, both mentally and physically.” He pauses. “You don’t run anymore?”
I shake my head. “No. I quit the team junior year because my father and Pete lost their minds.”
“Is that when you dated him?”
“Yeah. Half of junior year and all of senior year.”
“Then you left for college?”
“Yup. And essentially never looked back. I moved to New York for a year after college, then L.A., and then bought my condo in Oceanside. It was less expensive, closer to my parents, and on the beach. Of course, I don’t know how I’ll ever set foot in that place again.”
Landon pauses. “I think that will change as time goes on, but there’s no hurry.”
“Well, not for you. But that’s my home. I pay the bills there. My bed. My stuff. Now it’s kind of ruined for me. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel safe there. And don’t you dare suggest I sell it.”
“I would never suggest something like that,” he says gently. “But that would be a way to wipe the slate clean from this part of your life.”
“I love my place,” I admit. “I don’t want to leave. Plus, it’s paid for, and I don’t know that I’d find such a good deal again, right on the water.”
“Certainly a lot to consider. I think it’s too—” He turns just as I do, and I stumble as the fronts of our bodies brush against each other.
“Sorry,” I whisper, even as I grab his arm to steady myself.
He looks down at me with a soft, tender expression that makes my heart stutter against my ribcage. How can he be so physically imposing but also gorgeous and gentle at the same time?
To my surprise, he reaches out and brushes a stray tendril of hair off my cheek. The warmth of his fingers makes goosebumps break out on my skin, and I inadvertently lean into his touch, my eyes falling closed.
“You’re making it really hard to be a gentleman,” he murmurs.
“I hope you’re not doing that on my account,” I whisper, lifting my eyes back to his.
“Honey, I really was trying to do the right thing the other night,” he says, fingers still caressing my cheek. “You’ve been through a lot.”
“I have,” I agree, meeting his gaze steadily. “But this is about me reclaiming my power. Taking back the control I lost for those two days. And the truth is, I loved sex before—I want to make sure I still do.”
“You barely know me,” he protests, but I can see his resolve weakening.
“I know you got involved in something that had nothing to do with you because a stranger asked for help. I know I might be dead now if not for you. It says a lot about who you are as a man. And finally, everything else aside, I’m very attracted to you. What else do I need to know about you?”
“I don’t want you to feel like I’m taking advantage of you during a vulnerable time.”
“How can you take advantage of me when this has all been my idea?”
He doesn’t respond and for a few long moments, the silence is thick. Heavy with a combination of caution and desire. And I can almost see the change in him when he seems to give in to the inevitable. His handsome face softens, his eyes are trained on mine, and his lips part.
“I’m going to kiss you, Allora.” His voice is gruff but the expression on his face is one of pure tenderness.
“Yes. Please.”
I watch his face, slightly fascinated, as he threads the fingers of the hand that’s been caressing my cheek, into the hair at the back of my neck.
Then he wraps his other arm around my waist and very slowly pulls me forward, almost like he’s giving me the chance to back out.
And when I don’t, he lowers his head and brushes his lips across mine.
Talk about heaven.
I slide my arms around his middle and lean into the kiss, savoring every touch, every nibble, every moment of contact.
Part of me worried that any sort of intimacy would remind me of the rape but this is nothing like that.
In fact, I feel safe with Landon. Protected.
Like I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be, in spite of what happened to me, not because of it.
His lips are warm and soft, but also firm and possessive. He’s in no rush, mouth and lips caressing mine, exploring. No doubt he knows what he’s doing, and I succumb to the magic of the moment. Because it’s sensual and breathtaking. And we’ve barely started.
“Sweet,” he murmurs against my mouth. Then he slides his tongue against mine like we’ve done this a thousand times before.
I lift to my toes, because he’s so tall and I want so much more.
Before I realize what he’s doing, he’s lifted me in the air and my legs close around his waist as he backs me against the counter.
“Fuck, Allora.” His forehead hits mine, and I feel his erection against my core.
“I really want to take you to bed but—”
There’s a knock on the door.
“Elliott is here,” I finish his sentence with a wry smile.
He nods somberly. “Yup. But we’ll finish this later.”
I really hope so.