Chapter 14
Chapter
Fourteen
HADES
It’d been too damn long since I’d visited my realm.
What with the apocalypse taking every moment of our time and collective efforts, and all.
But by the looks of things, my crew was keeping things running like a well-oiled machine.
The lines had never been longer, but that was to be expected with all the death and destruction Earth had seen the last few months.
“Now serving soul number 7,568,989,001 at counter ten,” an automated voice said over the din of people waiting their turn.
“What the fuck is that garbage?” Asshole asked, pawing at my leg.
“I have no fucking clue,” I muttered, his question mirroring my own. “Shouldn’t you know? You’re the one who's been holding down the fort.”
Asshole scoffed. “How very dare you imply I’ve been slacking when you know I’ve been on a super important mission with my girl Keeks.”
“Who gave permission to change the way we do things? Who are all these people at the counters?” I scanned the ten kiosks that had replaced Janine’s desk.
Each soul behind the impersonal glass barriers looked less than thrilled to be there.
Complexions ashen, eyes sunken, expressions grim.
They appeared more like prisoners than willing volunteers.
“Not exactly Miss Argentina, are they?” Asshole asked.
“From Beetlejuice?”
“Fuck yeah. She was my favorite shade of blue, and those stems . . . Mmm, I bet she gives a real good walk.”
I groaned before storming past the people waiting to be processed and headed toward the kiosks.
“You haven’t met your quota yet, Al. I told you, if you want to avoid the infernal fires of floor seven, you have to process at least fifty percent faster than you have been. Time is money, pal. Stop wasting mine.”
Janine. I turned in the direction of her voice and made a beeline for my number two.
“What the fuck is this?” I asked when I came up behind her.
Janine jumped and spun toward me, one hand pressed against her chest, the other clutching a clipboard.
After sucking in a breath, she righted her cat-eye glasses and gave me a stern glare.
“Boss. You really gotta stop sneaking up on a girl. You gave me a fright. If I wasn’t already dead, I might’ve had a coronary. ”
“Who the fuck are these souls you have doing your job?”
“Now serving soul number 7,568,989,002 at counter seven.”
“And what in Zeus’s name is that?” I gestured wildly at the space because the computerized voice seemed to come from everywhere all at once.
Janine smacked her gum as she looked upward with a grin. “Oh, that? Isn’t it nifty? It really saves my voice.”
“What happened to the personal touch? To welcoming the downtrodden?”
She blinked up at me. “Boss, maybe you’ve been too busy enjoying your honeymoon, but the world is ending.
Do you have any idea how many souls Charon is bringing over per day?
Hell is full. At capacity. Bursting at the seams. I was talking to myself during my off time, ‘Welcome to the underworld, name, death date, and papers’ over and over.
It’s just too much for a single gal to manage on her own. I had to call in reinforcements.”
“She makes a good point,” Asshole said.
I nodded. She really did.
“Yeah, fair enough.”
Janine squinted at me. “Pretty sure you aren’t making a house call for funsies, so what is it this time?”
“First, I need you to elaborate on all this,” I said, looking toward the kiosks. “Who are they, and why do they look like they’re being tortured?”
“Like I said, hell is full. These guys are all destined for eternal damnation with nowhere to go. What better way to serve their sentences than to have to see all the good and kind people passing on to the Elysian Fields?”
Janine was, dare I say it, diabolical.
“Miss Argentina would never. She was an angel,” Asshole muttered.
Janine rolled her eyes. “Feel free to leave a suggestion in the box. Oh, wait, there isn’t one.”
“Do you see how she treats me? She’s on a power trip, boss man. You gotta do something.”
“Well, someone has to be in charge. You’re off frolicking with Kiki, and the boss is on vacation.”
“I wouldn’t call it vacation.”
Janine talked straight over me. “I’m trying to keep our realm running smoothly.
I still see souls to their final destinations on a case-by-case basis.
For instance, I just helped an adorably confused Frenchman find his way to his heaven not long ago.
He was so lost. But Famine sucking your soul from your body will do that to ya. ”
I blinked and held up a hand. “Famine? Which one?”
“How am I supposed to know? It wasn’t exactly part of his paperwork. Does it matter?”
“It might.”
“Then I guess you’ll have to go and ask him, won’t you?”
I sighed, feeling like I was being pulled in a dozen different directions.
I’d come here to collect an article of Death’s, but I couldn’t leave without finding out about this soul’s run-in with a horseperson.
No matter which one it might be, the information was pertinent to the resistance’s mission.
“Where is he?”
“Right this way.” Janine took off her glasses and let them hang like a necklace as she strode down the endless hallway lined with doors to various celestial realms.
Asshole made to follow, but I turned and squatted down so I was at his level. “I need you to do something for me.”
“Name it, boss. You want I should bite her ankles for getting sassy?” He wagged his little tail so hard he couldn’t sit still.
I chuckled and couldn’t help but give him a few scritches under his fuzzy chin. “No. She’d probably poke one of your eyes out with her pointy shoe. I need you to go to my office. There’s a bundle wrapped in leather tucked in the false floor under my desk.”
“Oh, the one where you try to hide things from me?”
I should’ve known my dog would be able to sniff out any and everything. He did have three noses in his normal form, after all.
“That’s the one.”
He lifted a paw in what I thought was supposed to be a salute but just looked like a sweet as hell wave. Then he trotted off the other way.
“He’s in here. Just be gentle with this one. He’s new, and death really did a number on him. Unexpected doesn’t even begin to describe it.” Janine pointed to a door, her demeanor more tender than was typical.
“Thanks, Janine.”
I reached for the handle, but Janine stopped me with an uncharacteristic touch. “Boss? I’m sorry about the changes. I didn’t know what else to do. There’s just so many of ’em.”
“No apology needed. You did what I asked you to do. What I trust you to do.”
She gave a little sniff, the only indication that my words affected her. “All right, well, if that’s everything, I have work to do.”
I winked at her. “Best get to it.”
“Yeah, my boss is a real pain in the drain.” Her laughter chased her down the hallway as she tossed me a finger wave over her shoulder. “Make sure to say bye before you go.”
“Why? So you know when you can slack off?” I called after her.
“So I can release the strippers. A whole truckload of them just came in from Vegas. I’m considering putting in a theater just so they have somewhere to use their skills.”
The sad part was, I couldn’t tell whether or not she was joking.
With a shake of my head, I turned my attention back to the matter at hand. I hadn’t interrogated a soul in a long time. I had people who did that sort of thing for me now, but every once in a while, I found cause to dust the old skill set off.
“It’s just like riding a bike,” I told myself as I opened the door and stepped inside what could only be the French countryside.
I found him sitting under the shade of a tree. He didn’t hear me approach, which was common for the newly dead. They weren’t aware of much aside from their inner turmoil as they processed their demise. Especially if it was sudden or traumatic.
Settling in the grass next to him, I stared out at the gently flowing creek as it glistened in the perpetual late afternoon sun.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” I asked, never looking away from the water.
“Oui.”
“It’s designed to set you at ease. This realm. It adjusts to fit your memories, recreating your favorite place.”
The man finally looked at me, brows furrowed as he assessed me. “I’m sorry, but who are you?”
“My name is Hades, and this is my world. Well, yours now too.”
Eyes widening, he scooted away as if he might try to run from me.
“Easy, I’m not going to hurt you.”
“Then why are you here?” he asked, still giving me a wide berth.
“The manner of your death left me with more than a few questions.”
He huffed out a laugh. “You and me both.”
“Yeah, I imagine so. What’d you do to piss Famine off?”
Shaking his head, he glanced down at the grass between his bent knees and began plucking at the blades. “I have no clue. One moment I was making myself a coffee, the next she had overtaken me and made me a prisoner in my own body.”
She. Well, that was one question answered.
“What did she want with you?”
“I think it was proximity. She wanted access to my master and his friends.”
“And who was he?”
“Monsieur Laurent. He wasn’t who I thought he was, though I only know that thanks to her. He was like her. A horseman. They all were.”
A frisson of excitement raced down my spine, causing me to straighten and turn toward him. I’d come to the underworld to find the horsemen, but what were the odds information about them would fall so easily into my lap?
“You were with them all? Where?”
“Oui. And sweet Merri. Oh, that poor girl. She trusted me, and I unwillingly led her to her doom.”
That sounded exactly like the kind of underhanded shit the horsewomen would pull. They loved to manipulate and mastermind situations. The horsemen were far more direct than their female counterparts.
“She’s gone?”
He nodded, despondent. “She is probably dead by now. It’s all my fault.
But Famine was too strong. I couldn’t fight her.
Not when she whispered in Merri’s ear and sowed doubt about the horsemen, not when she lied and drew false wards of protection.
I had to watch it all happen and was helpless to stop it. ”
I recognized a doom spiral better than anyone, and I knew I had to stop this one before I completely lost him.
“Merri’s not dead.”
“How do you know?”
I raised a brow. “This is my realm. I’d know if she were here.”
“Right.” He blew out a heavy breath. “Well, that’s one bit of good news.”
“Where are the others? I can help them.”
He gave me a suspicious glare in response. “How can I trust you? You’re Hades. I have heard the tales of your trickery and dishonesty.”
I snorted. “Handed down by my brother, Zeus. Untrustworthy megalomaniac. I have a vested interest in keeping our worlds as they are, not ending them. The horsemen are an integral part of that.”
He studied me for several heartbeats before giving me a little nod. “I suppose it doesn’t matter much to me one way or the other. I’ll be dead regardless.”
“That’s true. But helping the horsemen means helping Merri. You could still right a wrong. Or at the very least, toss a spanner in the works of the one who killed you.”
After a long pause, the man heaved a sigh and stood, me following suit. Then he turned to me and gave me everything I needed to locate the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
I was gone between one thought and the next, appearing at the gates of a secluded chateau in France.
Wards that should have stopped me dead in my tracks didn’t do more than tickle as I pushed through them and onto the property.
Famine had laid herself a devious trap. A cursory search of the premises revealed an unfortunate truth.
They were gone.
Thankfully, I still had an ace up my sleeve. It would have been a nice change of pace for things to be easy, but I wasn’t returning empty-handed. It was impossible to know whether the horsemen planned on returning to this place, but now that I knew it existed, I could always pop by and check.
One way or the other, we would find them.
It was only a matter of time.