Chapter 6 #2
She leaned back and stared at the lights above them.
“I’m picky, too, but not about people. I can’t seem to decide what I want to do with the rest of my life.
All my friends have everything planned out.
Most of them have families or careers already.
I feel like such a loser sometimes, being so indecisive.
But every time I think about making a choice, all the other options suddenly seem so much better.
Whatever I choose, I’m scared I’ll be stuck with it, but not choosing can be hard in a lot of ways, too.
It’s hard to stay close to friends you don’t have anything in common with anymore.
Even if you still talk, you don’t really talk, you know? ”
Adam leaned back beside her, looking far more relaxed than she’d ever seen him. “It’s the same when you get out of the military. Finding people you have much in common with becomes a challenge. I’d lost touch with normal civilian life, so I decided not to force it.”
“Doesn’t that get kind of lonely, though?
” she asked and then realized how ridiculous she sounded.
“What am I saying?” She laughed quietly.
“I’m just as lonely, and I kept in touch with everyone in my life.
I guess it makes no difference in the end.
Fake friendships aren’t any better than being alone. ”
He turned to look at her, and she suddenly felt overly warm. “There’s no such thing as not choosing a path, you know. No matter what you do, you’re moving forward. There are no breaks in life. It’s just the direction that changes.”
“Good point,” she said under her breath. “I guess I never thought of it like that.” She couldn’t handle the way he was looking at her, like he was seeing all the way through her to something she’d tried and failed to bury.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before muttering, “I’m a terrible boss.”
“Why?” She scooched closer in her haste to comfort him. “I think you’re the best boss ever. You’re fair and helpful, and look how fast I learned the job. What makes you a terrible boss?”
It took her too long to notice that his cheeks were turning red. “Because I want to kiss you right now,” he said. “And I know I shouldn’t.”
Kyra’s heart started beating faster. She couldn’t believe she’d heard those words come out of his mouth. “Why?”
“It would be unprofessional,” he answered.
“Aren’t we kind of past that already?” Kyra surprised herself with her forwardness. Apparently, he’d inspired her with his own. “Professionalism is overrated,” she added for clarity.
Suddenly, the lights flickered and went out. Several horses whinnied at the change, and Kyra sat up, thinking she should do something about it. But what could she do?
“They’ll be fine,” Adam reassured her.
There was a crash of thunder and a flash of lightning, and Kyra almost stood up in shock.
But Adam’s hand was heavy on her shoulder.
Before Kyra quite realized what she was doing, she was in his arms. His mouth was on hers, and she was reciprocating eagerly.
Her hands were on his chest, feeling every muscle as they tensed at her touch.
Another round of thunder and lightning had her holding him even tighter. The blanket around her had slipped, but she didn’t care. And it didn’t matter. Adam was already slowly unwrapping it, his fingers tracing her bare skin beneath it.
They were beyond speech, beyond anything other than pure, animal instinct.
He kissed her mouth and her throat and then moved down and down.
It took him seconds to get her bra and underwear off, and then his mouth found her breasts and his hands were at her hips.
The blanket she had been wearing was now beneath her, mercifully acting as a barrier between her skin and the hay.
She bit his lip gently to let him know how badly she wanted him, and then he slid down between her thighs, his teasing breath making her arch her hips up in eager anticipation.
Every single thought left her head. He used his tongue and his lips to bring her to the edge, and then just as she was crying out with pleasure, he shifted back up and gave her exactly what she had been craving.
Between the lightning, the thunder, and the passion, Kyra doubted she would ever forget this night.
And it felt so right to be taken by this man, whom she’d been admiring since the day she met him.
Finding out that he wanted her back meant the world to her, and now that she could feel how much, it meant even more.
She wrapped her legs around him and moaned his name into his ear. That seemed to drive him even crazier. He sped up, interlaced his fingers with hers, and groaned, unable to hold back any longer.
It was as if the two of them had entered another world, one where nothing mattered besides each other, where there were no questions, no answers, and no consequences. Kyra was so ready for a new relationship that she truly believed this thunderstorm was destiny lending her a hand.
Adam kept going as Kyra cried out, her voice mingling with the sound of thunder.
Only then did he allow himself to release as well, burying himself deep within her and groaning in satisfaction.
The whole affair was downright athletic, so when it was over, they were both drenched in sweat.
Adam threw the blanket he had recently thrown off himself over both of them to keep them from getting a chill.
Then he covered her in more kisses as though his appetite had already returned.
The whole evening had played out like the best kind of dream.
Kyra couldn’t begin to feel guilty for enjoying herself so thoroughly.
She was already imagining her future on the ranch with him.
A quiet voice in the back of her mind was whispering for her to guard her heart.
Be careful, it said. But Kyra was not prepared to listen to it.
It had been years since she’d felt real hope, and this hope was in the afterglow of real pleasure.
She couldn’t be happier if she tried. She was not about to throw it away on caution.
That wasn’t at all like her anyway. Kyra was the kind of person who jumped into the deep end with both feet.
She was happy to take risks and throw caution to the wind.
It couldn’t have been more perfect that Adam seemed to be the same kind of person.
She couldn’t wait to experience more magical nights with him. ***
For the first time in her life, Kyra woke up in someone else’s arms. She didn’t even remember falling asleep.
Her head was full of warmth and love, and her heart felt like it had grown wings overnight.
Slowly, she opened her eyes to see the man lying beside her.
He looked so peaceful. She didn’t want to move a muscle and risk waking him.
They were both tangled up in the blankets they had worn the night before, and the sun was starting to creep into the barn.
It seemed Adam was also used to waking at the crack of dawn, because his eyes fluttered open shortly after hers did, much to her disappointment. As soon as he saw her, he sat up.
“Morning,” Kyra said with a smile. “I think our clothes are dry by now.”
He didn’t say anything in response. He wrapped a blanket back around his waist and walked to the stall where his clothes hung.
Kyra was thrown off by his sudden coldness.
She’d been so happy that morning and assumed they were on the same page.
But he was throwing his clothes on like he couldn’t get away from her fast enough.
She decided to do the same. It seemed ridiculous to lie there naked now that he was getting dressed with that look on his face — that look that was far too close to regret for Kyra’s comfort.
She couldn’t think of what to say to him.
Every possibility she considered felt wrong when she thought about it.
She didn’t want to pressure him, but she didn’t want to dismiss him either.
Then, he beat her to the punch. “Last night was a mistake,” he said in a gloomy voice, “and I owe you an apology.”
“No, you don’t.” She shook her head. “It was mutual. I enjoyed—”
He cut in. “It was unprofessional, and it won’t happen again.”
“Oh.” She bowed her head, even more unsure about how to respond to this development. “Right.”
“We’re attracted to each other,” he said like it was some kind of clinical diagnosis. “Now that we understand that, we can behave appropriately. I’m your boss, and I should act like it. From now on, we’ll keep a reasonable distance, so this sort of thing doesn’t happen again.”
Kyra’s heart was breaking, but if she’d ever been good at anything, it was putting on a brave face. She finished dressing and managed a friendly smile. “You’re right,” she said. “We’ll be more professional from now on. I agree that’s for the best.”
It was a lie, of course. Kyra had already begun imagining their future together.
He didn’t seem like the one-night-stand type, so she assumed he had real feelings for her.
But if he didn’t, there was no use in begging for them.
Feelings weren’t something that could be forced.
It was far better to accept the situation and move on.
That’s what Kyra had always done in the past, so that’s what she would do now.