Chapter 23
Haji
End Of Week Six
Zoe looked like a true country girl. A cowgirl hat was on her head.
She had on a white tank top that was tucked in high-rise jean shorts.
Her small waist and wide hips were on full display in the outfit, and I was loving every inch of her.
Long cowgirl boots made her look taller than she actually was, and her jewelry showed just how bougie my country girl was.
Her ears, neck, and wrists were iced out, and I had been a proud man all night, because all eyes had definitely been on her.
The trail ride had Zoe on one. She’d danced, rode a bull and a horse, smoke and drank, and had what she kept calling the time of her life. Her smile was so beautiful, her laugh was a symphony, and I fell more and more in love with her the more she enjoyed herself.
As much as I said I would let her go if that was what she decided she wanted, I was glad it didn’t come down to that. I was glad she chose to stay here with me. I was glad she wouldn’t be another woman I loved and had to say goodbye to prematurely.
“Babe!” Zoe yelled as she raced toward me, fringe boots dancing with each sway of her hips. As I wrapped my arms around her, she said, “I’m having so much fun, but I’m ready to go.”
Chuckling, I nodded my agreement. I didn’t mind stepping out with her and having a good time, but I’d been isolating for so long I’d become an introvert. Nothing was better than having my precious one on one.
“Then let’s go.”
“Okay, but let me go say bye to my friends. Taryn and Jadyen are over there with their men. Jessie too!”
“Aight, my love. Go say your goodbyes while I pull the truck around.”
“Okay, cool.”
As I suspected, I ended up having to go get her ass.
I found her hugged up with Jessie. Their eyes were closed as they swayed back and forth with wide grins.
Me and Nathan shook hands and laughed before pulling the women apart.
They acted like they didn’t have plans to have brunch in the morning.
As I carried her to the truck, she rested her head on my shoulder and played with my beard.
“I love you,” she muttered, snuggling closer against me.
“I love you too, Precious.”
“Take me to the river,” she requested, and I didn’t hesitate to agree.
The drive to the river was short and quiet.
When we arrived, there were a few people there, but they were in their own world.
I drove toward the edge of the river that connected to the mountains and reversed, then put the blankets and pillows in the bed of the truck.
With the way I was feeling, there was a chance we’d end up sleeping here tonight.
As soon as we got comfortable under the stars, Zoe’s fingers locked around mine.
She yawned before turning slightly and tossing her leg over mine.
“God, this is beautiful. I’ll never get tired of this view,” she confessed, running her hand up and down my chest.
“Same,” I agreed, dropping a kiss on her head as I pulled her closer. “Thank you for staying, Zo. Thank you for waking my heart up again. For giving me something, someone to hope and live for.”
“It’s been my pleasure, and I’ve loved every second of it. Thank you for making me feel safe. And seen. And cherished. And loved. I came here empty and now I’m so full.”
“I got something else that’ll fill you up too.”
She giggled as I lowered her hand to my hardened dick.
“Oh, I always want that.”
“You know you getting fucked before the night is over, right?”
“I can’t wait.”
“You a freaky lil thing, and I love that shit.”
“I want it now,” she decided, straddling me and unzipping my pants.
I put my hands behind my head and let her do her thing.
A low hum escaped me when she took my dick into her mouth.
She looked far too innocent to give the sloppy, nasty head she gave.
The shit felt so good she had me inhaling sizzling breaths and moaning her name.
Gripping her arm, I warned her that I was about to cum.
Her mouth opened wide, tongue out, as she stroked my seeds out with both hands.
“Fuck,” I roared, pushing her away as my legs twitched.
On her knees, Zoe giggled as she pulled her shirt over her head. I sat up and pulled her shorts and panties down. Leaving them around her ankles, I positioned her so that she could look at the stars while I fucked and filled her with my seeds from behind.
The Next Morning
I’d stopped by Zina’s and Lianne’s graves.
After giving them both flowers, I was honest with them about the changes in my life and the way those changes made me feel.
How I felt about Zoe and how life was progressing with her.
I spent a little extra time with Zina today.
A part of me felt like I owed her. Not only was she my best friend while she was alive, but she gave me the best love I’d ever had when she transitioned.
Acknowledging that truth made me break down.
I hated feeling like my love for Zoe was covering the love I had for Lianne.
Then I realized my love for Zoe wasn’t covering the love I had for Lianne; it was covering the pain I’d been living in from losing her.
I was able to love Zoe and be loved by her because I’d lost Lianne.
And when you experienced a loss like that, it made you intentional every day of your fucking life to ensure you never felt robbed of the chance to love and live again.
Every day, I was intentional with Zoe. I made sure she didn’t just hear my love, but she felt it.
I made sure she never had to question the lengths I’d go to, to protect and cherish her.
I made sure I did everything I could to make her happy.
The more I gave her, the better I treated her, the more Zoe doubled it and gave it back.
The happier I made her, the more she increased my peace.
The more I loved her, the more she loved and respected me.
I had Lianne to thank for that, and when I accepted that truth, the guilt released.
As I made my way back to my truck, a smile was on my face. I got inside and called my precious.
“Hey, GG,” she almost sang, reminding me yet again how good it felt to be loved proudly. To be cared for and prioritized by a woman who felt safe enough to be happy with me.
I understood we had no idea when our lives and relationships would be over, but for the first time since my wife died, I had a reason, a person that made me want to live and love for as long as I possibly could.
“Hey, my love. What do you want me to bring home for breakfast?”