Chapter Twenty-Four Summer #3
That’s what Ezra said to me once, and I believed him then.
I believe him now too.
I turn to him, and the second I do, I can see it in his eyes, the ones that are begging me to say something. The ones that are pleading with me to trust in him.
And I do.
Ezra loves me.
I take a step toward him, then another.
He meets me in the middle, and though I can tell he wants to reach out to me, he doesn’t.
He stands two feet away, his stare boring into me.
“Sunny?” he says after a few quiet moments.
I let out a shaky breath. “I told myself when I came here that I was just coming here for my father. That was it. Then you happened. You walked into that police station, and you irritated the hell out of me. You also called me on my shit. You pushed me when I needed it the most. And you were so unapologetic about it, and I respected that. I respected you. I . . . loved you. I still love you.”
His entire face lights up, just like it does when he’s on the ice or when he’s speeding down Harborview Boulevard. “Yeah?”
I smile. “Yeah. And I’m sorry I’ve pushed you away this past week. I—”
“No, don’t apologize. You don’t have to.”
“I do,” I tell him. “You need to hear this.”
I inhale slowly, then exhale.
Then I do it again.
“I was scared,” I say simply. “I saw my dad lying there in the hospital bed, and I thought, This is my fault. I came back to Port Harbor for him, to take care of him. But I also came back because of what happened in Chicago. They blacklisted me there. Did you know that? I was running the kitchen at Lore, and I couldn’t handle the pressure. I . . . I couldn’t take it.”
The words leave me in a rush, and once they’re out, I realize just how badly I needed to say them. To come to terms with what I did and try to move on.
I’m ready to do just that.
“It’s okay, Summer. It happens.”
“It wasn’t, though. Okay, I mean. I blew up.
I freaked out on everyone. It was bad. There were videos of it circulating in the industry, and I was ousted before I even made it home that night.
I will never be able to work in Chicago again, maybe anywhere other than Port Harbor, for that matter.
I know you know what it’s like to lose your dream, but that wasn’t your fault.
You had no control over it. But me?” I point at my chest—aching for what I lost, and what I hope to recover.
“I’m the one who burned mine right before my own eyes.
I’m the one who threw it all away because I was having a bad week.
So, when I came out here, I promised myself that I was done.
I wouldn’t try again. I had my shot, and I wasted it.
I was moving on, and I was going to focus on my father.
” I sigh. “But then Stick Taps happened. You happened. And all those promises fell by the wayside. I don’t regret it, but I did at first. When I saw my father, I did.
But how can I regret something that feels so good?
So right?” I shake my head. “I can’t. So I’m sorry.
I’m sorry I tried to push you away. I’m sorry that I tried to run again.
But I am not and cannot be sorry that I love you. ”
I take a step toward him.
“I’m still scared, but I’m willing to try if you are.”
He doesn’t say anything for a long time. He just stares at me, and try as I might to read his gaze, I can’t.
My fingers begin to itch, and everything in me starts to buzz in a way it hasn’t since I was standing in the kitchen at Lore, knowing I ruined everything.
Did I ruin everything here too?
Then finally, he speaks.
“Can I kiss you now?”
A laugh bubbles out of me, relief flooding every inch of me. “Yeah, Ezra, you can kiss me now.”
He hauls me into his arms with lightning-quick speed, and his mouth crashes to mine in a kiss that I can feel in my toes.
And it feels like coming home.
It feels like every piece of me that broke off over the last week is coming crawling back and sliding into place.
I’m not sure how long we kiss, but it’s so long that I’m not sure who is holding up who anymore.
“I’m scared too,” he says when we finally pull apart.
“I have been since I saw you sitting at that metal table, looking smug. I knew even then that you were going to rock my world. I just didn’t know how.
But now that we’re here . . . fuck, I don’t know.
I can’t picture it any other way. This is it for me. You’re it for me, Summer. I’m yours.”
I grin. “It was my brattiness that did it, wasn’t it?”
“And the apron helped too.”
I laugh, then pull him back in for another kiss.
“I love you,” he says against my lips.
“I love you, too, Ezra. Thank you for not giving up on me.”
“Never.”
I know deep in my bones that he means it completely, and I’m never going to take that for granted again.
“Want to dance?” he asks.
“With you? Always.”
“Always sounds good to me, Sunny.”
He takes my hand and leads me back inside, where I spend the rest of the night in his arms, then his bed.
Something tells me that no matter what, we’re going to be okay.
And maybe even forever.