Chapter 29
GATHERED HER CONTROL
“You’ve got a boyfriend?” Billy asked her on Saturday. It was eleven and they were waiting for Julie to show up.
She’d asked Billy to arrive early, if it was possible, that she’d like to talk to him about something.
Since he knew what was going on with the notes and the car, he probably thought it had to do with that. It’d only been a text to him and he replied yes. Nothing more.
Typical, unless he had something to give her grief about.
Now they were in Lake George where Billy was going to get on the Minne Ha Ha one-hour cruise with Gracie and Julie, then go to lunch and walk the shops.
The fact that this was only fifteen minutes from her house made it more convenient for once. And that Blaze was off today also.
Double bonus.
“Yes. I wanted you to know. To hear it from me.”
Billy crossed his arms. “Has Gracie met him? Because that’s not fair.”
“Yes, she has, but she doesn’t know him as my boyfriend.”
Billy snarled at her. “I’m talking to my lawyer about this.”
“Billy,” she hissed. Gracie was still in the car with the AC on and watching a video in the backseat on Arden’s iPad. “I don’t have rules against me like you do.”
“Why not?”
“You should have put them there if you wanted them, but you didn’t say a word.”
“Because you never date.”
She wanted to throw her hands up, but that might alert Gracie to more going on. “That’s right! And that I am now, should tell you it’s important.”
“So is Tina.”
“I’m not disputing Tina is important in your life, but you’re the one who made the mistakes and you need to correct them for the courts to lift the restrictions.”
“Who is this asshole?”
She ran her tongue over her teeth in an attempt to bite back the words that wanted to come out of her mouth. Calmly, she said, “That’s not helping your case any replying that way.”
“Tell me, Arden.” His stance got more rigid, then he seemed to catch himself and leaned against his truck, his hands not curling into fists like they used to.
Didn’t matter. She still took a step back closer to her car door to get in if she had to.
Not that she’d thought Billy would do anything in the public, but it felt like she couldn’t trust herself anymore either.
“It’s my neighbor. The doctor. I’ve brought him up before. He works at the hospital.”
“Sounds suspicious to me.”
“How do you figure that?” Sometimes she couldn’t figure out what went through her ex’s mind.
“I don’t know. It just seems weird.”
“Actually, it might never have crossed our paths we were neighbors if it wasn’t for the day you showed up unannounced.”
“What does that mean?”
“That you were causing a scene and he’d just come home and witnessed it.”
“The guy who was watching us?” Billy asked. “How do you know he hasn’t been watching you all along?”
She blew out a breath. “He hasn’t been. I’d lived there a few days.
You showed up and made a commotion and he stood there to see if he had to intervene.
You saw it. Then he went inside. The next day I was called down to the ER.
He’s an ER doctor. We ran into each other. It just progressed slowly from there.”
“So it’s been a few months?”
“Friends for a few months. Dating about a month.”
“And you call that important?” Billy asked, waving his hand. “That’s having sex.”
She growled. “Don’t you dare pass your thoughts of your life and actions on to me. You should know better and the type of person I am. And I’ve got Gracie with me so if you think it’s easy for me to do any of those things, you’re nuts.”
“I hope to hell you’re not doing shit in front of our daughter.”
“What do you take me for, Billy? I barely touched you in front of her and she’s our daughter.”
“That’s right, cold as shit.”
She didn’t know why she did this here.
Maybe she thought he wouldn’t make a scene like he was. That Julie would want to know what was going on and she was going to state it there too.
Full transparency on her part.
If Julie wanted to meet Blaze prior, she’d arrange it. He said he would. She’d hold off letting Gracie know about her more personal relationship, but it wasn’t stopping her from spending time with the man who she was slowly losing her heart to.
Billy wasn’t going to have that hold on her life ever again.
She gathered her control like she’d been doing for so long in their relationship.
“Your opinion of me and our marriage is irrelevant. You didn’t think those things about me before and you know it.
I’d like to get to a stage in our lives where we can co-parent our daughter, but your reaction to every little thing makes it hard. ”
He leaned closer, his eyes hard as steel. “My reaction? You’re the one accusing me and my girlfriend of ridiculous things.”
“They aren’t ridiculous if they are happening to me. I don’t think you even care if I’m being threatened.”
“Hey, I brought your job up in our marriage. I said I didn’t like it. When you came home moody or upset, I told you to quit and find something else, but you fail to remember those times. When I cared and you said I didn’t.”
He was half right. He’d said those things, but it wasn’t because he cared about her safety, it was just what he’d said. Her moods.
“Like you’d want me to change jobs and make less money. You’re the one who said the pressure of having a child was too much for you.”
The silence he always greeted her with came out just now. The one that said she was right and he was trying to remember his points and not hers.
She wasn’t trying to be right.
She didn’t want to argue either.
She just wanted some peace in her life and it never felt as if she was going to get it.
“Here comes Julie,” he said when the car pulled into public parking. “Are you going to tell her about this doctor you’re dating? You didn’t even say his name.”
“Blaze Ridgeway. Look him up. His brother is the Warren County Sheriff. Another owns Ridgeway Hard Cider; his sister’s an attorney and the youngest brother a fireman in Glens Falls. You’ll find all sorts of things on him and his family. I’m not hiding a damn thing and I’ll let Julie know it all.”
She turned away from him, waited while Julie got out and walked closer.
“Everything okay?” Julie asked, her gaze between Arden and Billy.
“Yes. I was just telling Billy that I’m in a relationship. I’m letting you know to report to the courts. I don’t need to do that. It’s not in our paperwork, but I’m letting it be known.”
“That’s fine, but you’re correct you don’t need to tell me.”
“I am. Dr. Blaze Ridgeway, an ER doctor at Glens Falls Hospital. I’m not hiding anything. He’s aware of what is going on in my life and his brother is the sheriff of Warren County.”
Julie nodded her head. “Have you found out who could have done that to your tire or left the notes?”
She looked at Billy. He hadn’t even inquired about that. “No. But I’m taking precautions. I’m hoping that it was a mistake or that the person knows I’m not alone. Since it’s making the rounds at work I’m dating Blaze, I think people see me more, so more eyes. That’s a good thing.”
“It can be,” Julie said. “Does Gracie know?”
“Just that he’s Dr. Blaze to her and the neighbor.” She turned to Billy. “We spend time together, having dinner and doing activities, but we’ve shown no signs of affection other than friendship. I’ll keep it that way if I have to, but she’s not stupid.”
“It’s your decision,” Julie said. “Gracie hasn’t brought his name up yet.”
“She might now. We’ve spent more time with him since the last visit.
And Billy,” she turned to her ex, “if you think I’m jealous or causing issues with you and Tina, you’re wrong.
That is part of why I’m telling you this.
You are free to live your life just like me.
We need to move on. I want to move on. I’m hoping that things will go in that direction. ”
“I think things are moving there,” Julie said, nodding her head. “Unless there are other issues.”
“Nothing,” Billy said, his arms crossed. “I’d like to get on with my day. We’ll meet back here in four hours?”
“Yes. And remember, you asked for an extra hour and I didn’t think twice about giving it to you. Gracie is looking forward to today.”
If Arden thought her ex would thank her, she’d be left standing there holding her breath until she passed out.
She opened the door for Gracie who was sitting there watching them. “Can we go now?”
“You can. What do you say to your father for planning this day with you?”
“Thank you, Dad.” Gracie moved closer to Billy and gave him a hug unprompted. She looked at her ex and then Julie as if to say ‘See, I’m doing my part. Do yours.’
“Have fun. Remember, you’re with Dad an extra hour for fun today. See you at three.”
Arden got into her car and drove away, heading to Blaze’s house.
An afternoon alone. Something she hadn’t had with him since that first night two weeks ago.
That night had started with fear and adrenaline. A desperate need for comfort she hadn’t been able to admit to anyone but Blaze. What began as protection had bled into something else. Something uncontrolled and undeniable.
This time was different.
No fear. No shaking hands.
Just the slow, simmering thrill that had been building for days. The anticipation of seeing him again, touching him again, and losing herself to the one person she’d felt completely safe with.
Every text, every glance across the hospital hallway, around their homes, had been a reminder. A promise.
She’d craved it ever since.
Not just the physical, but the peace that came with it. The quiet certainty that he’d hold her no matter what storm washed through her life.
She refused to go back to the emptiness she’d called love before. She’d never accept a relationship like that again. Never allow herself to be held captive by guilt.
Pulling into her garage, she killed the engine, her pulse already racing faster than it should have been. A minute later, she was walking across the short stretch of driveways to his door with her heart hammering in her chest.
The door swung open before she could knock.
Blaze stood there, his eyes dark, his jaw set with the kind of focus that made her knees weak. Before she could speak, he pulled her inside, kicked the door shut behind them, and pressed her gently but firmly against it.
His mouth found hers in a kiss that stole the air from her lungs. Hot, sure, claiming. His hands framed her face, sliding to her neck, her shoulders, her waist, as if reacquainting himself with every inch of her body.
This was what she’d missed.
The feeling of being wanted and consumed by a man who could set her body on fire and still make her feel safe enough to fall apart in his arms.
She smiled against his mouth, breathless and certain.
“Now this is what I was talking about.”
His low chuckle vibrated against her lips, his forehead resting on hers.
“Yeah,” he murmured, his voice rough and full of tenderness all at once. “Me too.”
And then his hands were on her again, and the rest of the world faded into nothing but heat and heartbeats.
She grabbed his hand, pulled him up the stairs toward his room and over to his bed.
The same motions as two weeks ago, just a different place.
The same feelings of need, but a greater urgency.
They knew what the other had to offer. This time, she wanted to set the pace. To let him know he didn’t have to be gentle.
He didn’t have to worry she might break.
And if she did, he’d have her. She knew that one hundred percent.
Her hands gave him a tiny shove so that he ended up sitting on the bed. “I’ve got this burning in me that needs to be put out fast.”
“I don’t want to put out any flames in you.”
His hands reached for the bottom of her T-shirt and lifted it over her head.
She was going for the clasp between her breasts to undo her bra.
“You aren’t putting it out fully, but I need you. Need you more than I thought I would. That I thought I could any man. Take your clothes off.”
She was squirming out of her shorts and underwear while he did the same, then pulled her on top of him on the bed.
She noticed the condom out already on the bedside table and reached for it before he could.
It was open and in her hand, then over his dick and she was pushing him on his back again.
He glided up by the pillow, she straddled his hips, lined up, then sank down fast.
The fullness inside set off an avalanche of sensations throughout her core and into her heart.
“That’s it,” he said. “Just like that. Ride me.”
Her eyes stayed locked on his, her hands on his chest for leverage, her body rising and lowering.
She was squeezing him tight as she did. Gripping him with her inner muscles to get the full effect.
Her breath was catching, his too.
He wrapped his hand in her hair again, claimed her mouth with his, and lifted up as she sank down.
Their speed increased, her body was building, her nerve endings stretched taut.
She needed to come and she needed it now.
She wasn’t sure she’d ever moved this fast on a man before. Ever wanted to get to the end as desperately as she needed to in this moment.
And when she felt the tension give way. When she started to pulse and twitch and grip him tighter, then moan out his name, he flipped her fast on her back, then pounded into her with a lack of discipline she’d never thought she’d experience.
What they brought out of each other? That was what she needed in her life just as much as she needed him to hold her tight and let her know without words that everything was going to be okay.