Chapter Four
Ingram
The beast moved before me, a lumbering, mindless, rage-filled monster.
It had slipped through a small portal, escaped a dungeon, as a few of them did now and again.
Most dungeons opened fully, allowing espers to go inside, trapping civilians inside at the same time.
Those were the best-known type, the ones that made the news.
Occasionally, though, smaller portals would open for short periods of time, like tears in the fabric of our world, with monsters escaping through them before they closed and disappeared again.
These portals could be open for only a matter of a few minutes, gone before anyone knew about them. They were rarely ranked or remembered.
Shear was sensitive enough to notice them, however, as was I.
We felt the disturbance, even the slight one caused by unstable portals.
Only a fool would enter them, but we didn’t mind picking off the beasties that got through.
It was hardly a workout for Rank-S espers like us, but given the tension in the house, I appreciated the chance to get out.
The Guild wouldn’t even bother to send anyone, given it was a low level. They’d view it as too insignificant to waste time on. It meant they wouldn’t order espers there, but we did as we fucking wished.
Shear had confused the monster that had gotten free, forced it to move away from the community of homes and toward an open park which, given the late hour, was entirely empty.
Better this way. I preferred avoiding the risk of collateral damage. Our jobs were hard enough as it was without needing to deal with civilians. Some screamed, attracting the attention of the monsters, and others—the worst kind—actively tried to help, which just made things harder.
If they got themselves offed, that wasn’t my problem. I didn’t plan to lose any sleep over an idiot putting themselves in danger. The problem was that when the news got wind of it—or, god forbid, a video—the Guild liked to point fingers and blame us, and Carter ended up angry over it all.
I didn’t need to have him bitching at us over anything else—it happened enough already.
I moved through the shadows, in the space between this world and the dungeons, not quite here but not elsewhere, either. It hid me from everything, turned me into a mirage, allowed me to move fast, unseen, until I arrived just behind the beast.
It was twisted, just as they all were, as though some strange intelligence that had seen animals and nightmares had mixed them until it spat this vile creature out. This thing ran on four legs, its chest wider than its hips, its feet tipped with claws, the face more like that of a horse with fangs.
I could still recall the first time I’d seen a beast like this, when I’d come face to face with one before I’d turned into an esper.
Back then I’d been little, just a kid, all skinny and attitude in that gangly stage before I actually put on muscle.
I hadn’t known back then that I’d be one of the few who would change, who’d turn into an esper.
There weren’t any tests, nothing to figure it out, not until it happened sometime in the teenaged years.
The monster had charged out of the forest line back in Oregon, bigger than anything I’d seen before, roaring so loudly the ground shook beneath my feet. It had startled me so much that I hadn’t been able to even move, to jump out of the way.
And I’d done nothing.
I’d just stood there watching as that thing bounded right at me.
The moment it had towered over me, close enough that the rotten scent of its breath hit me, when I realized that I was looking straight at my death, something had gotten between us.
An esper.
My first time meeting one, in fact. It wasn’t like they usually hung out in poor-ass little towns, not unless they had good reason, and that reason was a portal that had opened a few miles away.
My mom had told me to stay inside, and I’d ignored her, like kids do, wanting to get a glimpse of the portal.
It wasn’t on TV, it was in my own fucking town, and I just knew the other kids would be talking about it come Monday.
It was funny to think that I was that esper asshole now. I’d thought he was some hero back then, amazed that he’d jumped between that beast and me. He was bigger than life, willing to face off against a monster like that.
And now I stalked something far more dangerous without breaking a sweat.
What I hadn’t known back then was that the esper had been a B-Rank, which was the reason he was out that far, mopping up strays who’d gotten past the line.
On the other hand, here I was with an A-Rank beast that would have wiped the floor with that esper asshole, assuming he was still alive.
It wasn’t like espers usually lived long or happy lives.
“Finish it.” Shear’s voice in my head grated on my nerves as it always did. I’d gotten used to it, as used to that bullshit as anyone could ever get, but that didn’t mean I liked it.
Still, telling him to knock it off didn’t matter. He never fucking listened, assuming he even understood anything.
At least Kenyon was an honest-to-fuck idiot. It was hard to blame him for much when he couldn’t help it.
Shear was smart—too smart. He just didn’t understand what being a human meant. Maybe that came from spending so much time looking into people’s brains. Anyone would go fucking insane from that.
Still, he wasn’t wrong. I slipped in close to the beast, watching as it shook its head back and forth in confusion. No doubt Shear had fucked their brains up so much they had no idea which way was forward. I had no idea what nightmares he’d planted there, how he’d warped the world around it.
I’d experienced it a time or two when my mental shield had failed, when I’d gotten caught up in a wide-cast illusion, and it wasn’t anything I wanted to feel again.
I slid out of that shadowy realm just beside the hulking monster and closed my hand around its throat. A quick jerk caused a sickening crack of bone, and the body fell into a useless, still heap in the dirt.
Shear came up beside me. “It’s farther away from the portal than they usually roam.”
I turned my gaze toward the portal that had opened but not remained open. “Sometimes they’re more stupid than usual.”
Shear pressed his lips together, those weird fucking eyes of his glowing even in the dark. “It’s different. The way they move, the way they travel. It’s with purpose.”
“You’re just being paranoid. What are you, six, believing in ghost stories? You need me to check for monsters under your bed, tonight?” I didn’t hide my mocking tone in the least. Let him hear it—he deserved it.
“No. I can check it myself.” He shook his head, as though he’d worked through options, then tossed them aside. “Something is different. Something is coming.”
“That’s cryptic as fuck and more than a little annoying. Either say something useful or don’t, but don’t pull that bullshit.”
Shear inched his eyebrows toward each other and shook his head again. It reminded me that as difficult as he was, as annoying as his words were, I should just have been fucking thankful that I didn’t live inside that fucked-up skull of his.
I had no idea what nightmares swam around in there, but if the things he cast into other people’s heads were any indication, it wasn’t a great area.
I lifted my arm to look at my watch, then hit the button for a cleanup crew. It pinned the location, and a moment later, a response told me they’d gotten the request and were sending people out.
No reason to wait around for it. At this point in the night, no one would come wandering this way, and even if they did? A dead monster was a hell of a lot less traumatizing than a live one.
Shear and I headed back to the office, and I remembered why I preferred working with him compared to anyone else. Shear remained silent most of the time. Sure, he could read my thoughts if he wanted—and sometimes even if he didn’t want to—but he didn’t fill the space with pointless talking.
And if I wanted to, he let me.
Kenyon never shut up, and Carter always felt the need to bitch at me over something I wasn’t doing right. They were both always on my ass, but at least Shear knew how to shut the fuck up for a while.
I drove—Shear tended to get distracted, and I didn’t need to get anything broken in a wreck—and in another twenty minutes, I pulled the SUV into the underground garage space, accessible from the front of the building.
A two-car garage was almost unheard of right off the beach, so finding it had been worth every pretty penny we’d spent on the beachfront property.
Shear said nothing as he left the car and headed inside, going up to his room in a way that would have been rude from anyone else. We made exceptions for him, though, and honestly?
Sometimes I preferred him to leave so I didn’t have to deal with his weird-ass personality.
I frowned as I stepped inside, the feeling strange. It didn’t take long for me to identify the source.
Guiding.
Not direct guiding. That was stronger. It was the difference between a slice of apple pie and just picking up a slight whiff of it.
With Yun in the house, a subtle guiding effect took over, something that would ease espers in that space.
It wasn’t enough to save one, of course, not enough to really stop corruption, but it reminded me why S-Rank guides were so fucking prioritized.
This could make the difference for some, this slight feeling of peace. Sure, a part of me fucking hated the idea of anyone affecting me that way, even in the positive, because I wanted to do shit on my own.
The other part of me, however, felt the gentle stroking of that power and wondered what she’d feel like if I slid into her.
I wanted to watch her squirm beneath me, her fingers digging into my arms, her hips rolling.
I wanted to taste the sweat that beaded up on her chest, to take her as she took the corruption from me.
I shook my head to dislodge the fantasy.
Was I a pervert? Yeah, I sure fucking was. I didn’t mind testing boundaries, but I drew my own line at whipping my dick out where it wasn’t wanted—and so far, that guide had made it clear she didn’t want it.
I didn’t think that would last, of course.
I headed up the stairs, taking them two at a time. We’d driven for a total of forty minutes for what was a thirty-second fight—if I even wanted to call it a fight. It hadn’t taken much out of me, other than winding me up and making me crave more.
That’s how it always was, though.
I wanted more. More of what, I had no fucking idea. Just more. More fight, more purpose, more reason, more guiding.
It all wrapped around me as I showered until I felt as though I couldn’t breathe.
This feeling inside me hadn’t gone away, not for a fucking minute, though it lessened when I did one specific thing.
I grabbed my phone, water droplets still running down my bare skin, over the intricate lines of the tattoos that covered me, and sent a message.
It didn’t take much, just a few words. I didn’t even bother to pay attention to who I sent it to—anyone with a star by their name in my contacts would do.
The response was fast. An immediate yes and an address.
This clawing need for more, this hunger that never found satiation, it only quieted when I lost myself in the body of someone else.
Sure, I was a pervert and a man whore and a fucking bastard, but it was the only damned time I found even a moment of solace.