Chapter 37 Can I Kiss You?
can i kiss you?
HAYDEN
Riley is glowing.
And I’m still overwhelmed with the happiness and love that enveloped me during the ultrasound.
I’m going to be a girl dad.
“You’re strangely quiet for someone who couldn’t shut up an hour ago.” Riley nudges me, one hand resting on her belly. “What’s on your mind?”
I rake my fingers through my hair and shift in my seat to face her. “Our daughter.”
“I know.” She tilts her head to the side, her hair falling over her shoulder and seat belt. “Are you happy it’s a girl? Or did you want a boy?”
“I’m over the moon, and I would be feeling the same if it were a boy.” I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, my fingers lingering on her skin. “I’m just thrilled you’re having my baby.”
Silence settles between us, but it’s warm, comforting. Her smile lights up the space, making my world more vivid. But despite how comfortable it is, I need to hear her voice.
“How’s work?” I ask.
Silvery laughter springs from her mouth. “Work is great. The kids are having fun helping me pick the dances we’re going to learn this year.” She grins at me.
“Have you told Adelaide you’re pregnant?”
“Yeah.” She sighs. “She wasn’t thrilled, but she knows how much my students love me, and she doesn’t want to lose me, so it’s all good.”
Relief washes over me. She wouldn’t have to work another day in her life if she didn’t want to. I can more than provide for her and our daughter. But she loves her job.
“Nastya says I got lucky.” She laughs softly. “Adelaide became a grandmother recently, and it’s made her softer.”
“How is Nastya? Does she still hate me?”
She arches a brow, leaning in. “I wouldn’t say she hates you. She sees everything you’re doing for me, but she’s still skeptical.”
I scratch at my jawline. “Any suggestions for what I can do to win her over?”
Riley peers out the window then turns to me. “Keep treating me like a princess. That might do the trick.”
Fuck. It’s impossible not to be turned on when she says things like that. I want her all over again.
The car stops, but rather than climb out to put space between us like she usually does, she holds my gaze, her bottom lip trapped between her teeth.
I shift closer, though I don’t touch her.
I want to do this the right way, even if being a gentleman who wants to get his girl back in a respectful way is a pain in the ass sometimes.
“I talked to Ines,” she says casually. “I want to do a pregnancy photoshoot in another month or two.” She ducks, worrying her lip again. “Do you think you’d want to do it with me? Maybe one or two of you—”
“Yes. A photo or two, or a dozen. Anything you want.”
“Great. Thank you.” She leans in and kisses my cheek. “Night, Hade.”
A thrill of excitement zips down my spine. “Night.”
She says goodbye to Wyatt then climbs out. We wait, watching her enter her building, and when she texts to say she’s in her apartment, I give Wyatt a nod.
Love :
I’m home. Thank you for today.
Me:
Sleep tight. And thank you for inviting me. It means everything.
Today has been magical. Listening to our baby’s heartbeat and watching her on the screen tore me apart and stitched me back together all at once. It made me stronger and even more determined to win Riley back.
Riley Evans will be mine.
“Wyatt?”
He eyes me in the mirror, one brow cocked. “Sir?”
“Take me to the studio, please. I have a song to finish.”
The melody that came to me the day I first heard my baby’s heartbeat returns as I put my fingers on the piano keys. It takes a minute to get it right, the sound almost foreign after spending weeks focused on Sabotage. This song isn’t for the band. This one is different. Personal. It’s Riley’s song.
I’ll let her decide what to do with it.
I sing, double-checking the lyrics I wrote every now and then, tweaking them and adding the last chorus.
This song is about my darkness and her light, about two people tangled so tightly in each other’s lives, their love felt almost forbidden. Almost wrong. It’s about the shadows that helped them see how right it really was.
It’s about the way love can drag a person under and save them all at once. Hades and Persephone, only this time, Hades is begging her to stay, never chaining her.
The words come easier than they have since before Owen’s death. I smile as I play despite how raw the lyrics are, how much truth they hold. It’s liberating, putting my love into song.
I still have a few arrangements to make, but by the end of the week, Riley will know how I feel about her.
With a bouquet of irises and forget-me-nots in my hand—a perfect shade of blue that reminds me of her eyes—I lean against my car, waiting for Riley. She knows I’m coming, but she has no idea about the detour I’ve planned. Fingers crossed she’ll agree to go with me.
The doors of the studio open, and booming laughter floats through the air. Nastya walks out first, then Riley. Fuck, she’s a vision. She’s wearing a white dress with a little cut-out on her waist and white sneakers, her hair cascading over her shoulders in long waves.
My girl literally takes my breath away.
“Hey.” She plants a kiss on my cheek and rears back, eyes on the bouquet. “Another one? It’s only been three days since the last time you brought flowers.”
“If I wasn’t being forced to do so much promo, I’d hand-deliver flowers every day,” I tell her as she takes the bouquet. Then, I turn to Nastya. “Hi. It’s nice to see you.”
There’s a subtle narrowness in her eyes as she studies me. Riley isn’t joking when she says her friend’s face has subtitles. I respect the way she’s assessing me, really. She does it because she cares for Riley, and I can’t fault her for that.
“Hi,” Nastya finally says. “Likewise. It’s good to see you finally pulled your head out of your ass.”
“Nastya!” Riley slaps her friend’s shoulder. “You promised to be nice.”
“I am! That was a compliment.” Her lips quirk into a smile. “Right, Hayden?”
I snort, nodding. “Right.”
She kisses Riley’s cheek and whispers something in her ear. Then, she sashays to a car a few spots down.
I open the passenger door and step aside. “Ready to go?”
“God, yes.” She sighs. “Today was stressful. All I want is to bury myself under the covers and sleep.” She climbs in and fastens her seat belt.
A thread of concern works its way through me. “Did something happen?”
“It’s silly.”
I lean over her and cup her cheek, making her look at me. “Tell me. Please.”
“One of my students, a new girl…” She bites her bottom lip.
“She was struggling with pliés, and she ended up crying. I’m so emotional lately, I cried too.
That triggered some other girls to break into tears as well.
It was one big crying mess instead of a class.
It took Nastya and a ton of glitter to calm us all down. ”
No matter how hard I fight it, a smile overtakes me.
She rolls her eyes, but her lips twitch. “Don’t make fun of me.”
“I’m not. You’re too cute.” I kiss her temple and move away so I can close the door.
Once I’m inside the car, my nerves get the best of me, making my stomach twist. Tapping my fingers on the steering wheel, I take a deep breath, grounding myself. “I have a little surprise for you.”
“Aren’t flowers enough?” she teases, hugging them to her chest.
“Never enough.” I wink at her. “Is it okay if I take you somewhere? It’s not far.”
“By ‘somewhere,’ do you mean your penthouse?”
“I’m a creative creature, Ry baby. Do you really think I’m that boring?”
She lifts her shoulder. “Dunno. You are much older than me. Anything is possible.”
“The hits keep coming. Can’t a man catch a break?” I tease as I start the engine. “So, do I have your permission?”
“How can I say no to a man who brings me such beautiful flowers?”
As I pull out of the parking lot, some of my nervousness subsides. “They remind me of your eyes. So vividly blue.”
“Blue is my favorite color.” She twirls a lock of her blue hair around her finger.
“Mine too. All because of a girl with eyes the color of twilight and blue strands in her golden blonde hair.”
“Kiss-ass,” she murmurs, her cheeks turning pink.
“Just being honest,” I state as I focus on the road.
As we step into the small theater, an older man greets us. Glenn hired him to man the door tonight. My manager helped me arrange the surprise, promising no one else would be here.
With Riley’s hand in mine, I lead her into the auditorium. Hundreds of empty seats stretch in front of us, and a single spotlight shines on the piano at center stage. I’ve done lots of shows and performed in front of thousands of people, but I’ve never been quite as nervous as I am now.
Her footsteps echo as she follows me down the aisle. Her warm hand in mine helps me recenter myself.
When we reach the front row, I turn to her. “Remember that melody I tried to figure out after…” I choke on my words, my heart racing. That day is filled with memories, some incredible, others not. That’s the day I pushed her away. It’s the day before she left.
She squeezes my hand. “I do. What about it?”
“I finished it, and I want you to be the first to hear it.”
She looks around the empty hall. “And you booked the whole theater so you could play it for me?”
“I would’ve booked the Richard Rodgers Theatre on Broadway if I could organize it quick enough.”
“You’re such a show-off.” She shakes her head as she settles into a seat. “But I’d love to hear the song anyway.”
I flash her a smile and dash up the stairs onto the stage.
Fingers hovering over the keys, my heart once again pounding, I fix my attention on her.
“This one isn’t for Sabotage. It’s your song.
About you, about us. You get to decide what happens to it, whether I shove it in a drawer or sell it… anything. It’s up to you.”
She nods, worrying her lip, her eyes shining. So, I play.
The melody spills out, low and haunting, building with each verse. The theater’s acoustics amplify the music, my voice. The lyrics tell our story, a confession in every note.
Shadows and sorrows were my only friends,
Companions I never expected to have.
Kept love at a distance, too scared to claim,
Like Hades, I wanted to stay in the dark.
A girl with eyes so blue, even the twilight sky envious,
Slipped through the cracks, found me in the dark,
And I was no longer lost.
I am the dark, but she is the flame
That pulls me from shadows and stitches my scars.
I wanted to keep her, to make her stay,
But I ended up ruining it all.
I stand on my knees, the chains in my hands,
My heart has a brand of her name burned into it.
It’s always been her, it’s always been us,
And I was a fool not to say it aloud.
Forget-me-not in her hair, she watches me from afar.
I beg her to stay, like Hades, I’m afraid she’ll run.
And she only smiles, taking my hand and threading her fingers through mine.
My Persephone stayed, and I found the sun,
And we are finally free.
When I finish, silence lingers. I wipe my sweaty palms on my knees and stand.
Riley sits, spine straight, wide-eyed, her hand pressed to her belly.
I swallow the lump in my throat as I descend the stairs.
Once I’m in front of her, I crouch and place my hands on her knees.
“I love you, Riley. I’ve never experienced anything like this, and it’s still surreal, but it’s true.
” My voice cracks, so I take a few deep breaths to collect myself.
“I’m scared I don’t have a fucking clue how to be what you need.
But I love you, and I’m terrified I’ll never get a chance to be with you. ”
She places her hand on mine, eyes welling with tears.
“And not just because of our baby. I love her already, more than I can even say. But you—” I drink her in.
She’s so exceptionally beautiful, so soft, so mine.
“I want you for you. I want to build a family with you. A home. I don’t want to just be in your life.
I don’t want to just exist beside you. I need you. ”
Her breath hitches, her lips trembling.
Slowly, I stand and hold out my hand. When she takes it, I help her to her feet and cup the back of her head, tilting her face up to mine. My heart hammers against my rib cage, my pulse pounding in my fingertips.
“Can I kiss you?” I murmur, barely above a whisper.
She nods.
Feeling more alive than I ever have, I finally close the distance.