Chapter 20
Emilia
Several hours later, heedless of my protests, I find myself sitting in an exam room in Kinsley’s office.
The diploma on the wall says Dr. Kinsley Matloff, but she makes it clear to everyone who enters her office that she prefers to be called by her first name.
I’ve only been in Wilde a short time, but I consider Kinsley a friend.
She’d bop me upside the head if I called her Dr. Matloff.
I’m wearing a large napkin because my bossy boyfriend called Kinsley yesterday and told her I needed a full exam, even though I’m on my period. I don’t, but I’ll keep my lips zipped and humor him.
The truth is I’m secretly elated that I seem to have fallen for a man who gives a fuck about me beyond cursory nods. Many of my friends in college entered into deep relationships and got engaged. None of them had anything that came close to comparing to this thing I have with Haden.
I don’t know anyone my age who is actively interested in getting pregnant.
I’m twenty-two. I just graduated. If it weren’t for coming to Wilde and connecting with Haden, I would be heading off to graduate school to basically bide my time until I met the right man who wanted at least some of the things I want.
Except hell would have frozen over while I wandered the Earth looking for my right man because I’d already met him. I haven’t given any guys the time of day for four years because none of them compared to the man I already had in mind to be my husband and the father of my kids.
It’s been three days. I don’t know how it’s possible we ended up this deeply involved in such a short amount of time, but we did. And here we are. My overbearing man is in the exam room with me. He helped me undress, lifted me onto the end of the table, and put the paper gown on me himself.
His brow is furrowed, and he keeps rubbing his jaw because he’s irrationally concerned about my periods.
Kinsley enters with a smile and closes the door. “Good morning.” She reaches over to shake Haden’s hand. “I’m Kinsley.”
“Nice to meet you, Dr. Matloff.”
She holds up a hand. “Kinsley. Please. I’m uncomfortable with honorifics.”
“But you earned it,” he points out.
She shrugs. “And I prefer to go by my first name.” With a grin, she turns to me. “What brings you in today, Emilia?”
“This bossy neanderthal just found out that some women have violent periods, so he’s concerned about me dying from cramps or bleeding to death.”
Kinsley chuckles as she takes my vitals and then feels around my neck. “Are your periods regular?”
“Yes. On the dot. Twenty-eight days.”
“What are your symptoms?”
“I usually throw up once at the onset, have pretty severe cramping the first day, get emotional, cry a bit, take some drugs, sleep it off, and move on with my life.” I raise my eyebrows at Haden who narrows his gaze in warning. The urge to stick my tongue out is strong, but I refrain.
“How is your flow?”
“Heavy the first day, tapering off after that.” I’ve been through this conversation several times. I have it memorized.
“I assume you must have started your period recently?”
“Yesterday.”
Kinsley comes to my side. “Can you lie back for me?” She helps me extend. “Any breast tenderness?”
“Yes. It’s better today. They usually get sore the day before I start.”
Kinsley guides my closest arm above my head before lifting one side of the paper away from my breast and palpating around in a circle.
I wince slightly.
Haden stands at my other side, one hand on the table behind my head. His brows are furrowed as if I’m about to be told I’ll die later this week. From menstruating.
“Do you do regular self-exams?” Kinsley asks as she covers the first breast, switches my arm placement, and uncovers the other to repeat the process.
“I’m not very good at remembering.”
Haden growls low in his throat. “She’ll remember now.”
Kinsley smiles and looks up at him. “You can do them. It’s often the woman’s partner who finds anything unusual.”
“Kinsley! Don’t encourage him. He’s already so overbearing I’m smothering,” I argue.
She shrugs. “I would expect nothing less from anyone living in that mansion. I’m not the least bit surprised by this development. I could have predicted it weeks ago,” she teases. “Plus, I’m serious. Breast exams are important.”
“What do I need to do?” Haden asks.
“You saw what I did. Just do the same thing. Have her lie on the bed, arms raised, and palpate around in a circle. If you do it once a month, you’ll know her breast tissue so well that you’ll notice any changes.”
“What about when she’s nursing?”
“Same thing. It’s better to check her after fully expressing her milk.”
I sigh dramatically. Great. One more thing my bossy man is going to take on.
“Warning, I’m going to pinch your nipples now.”
I hold my breath while she grips first one and then the other. She does more than pinch. She squeezes hard a few times on each side.
“Have you ever had a discharge?”
“No. Not yet. I will in nine months if Haden has anything to say about it.”
Kinsley chuckles. “Probably before that. If you regularly engage in nipple play, you might start leaking a bit before you give birth.” She turns her attention to Haden and lifts a pointed finger. “Do not express her milk before the baby comes unless she’s past her due date. It can induce labor.”
He nods. “Got it.”
This is not a normal visit. I know Kinsley doesn’t talk like this to regular clients. But we Wildes are far from normal. She’s friends with all the wives. She’s aware that our men are intense and overzealous.
I’ve heard my brothers and cousins joking about milking their wives. That’s the same speech I got this morning. I suspect those barbarians got a hold of Haden in the past few days and told him how kinky they were, egging him on. They probably suggested what brand of pump to invest in.
I should not have been shocked when he started his lecture about controlling my milk supply. I probably should be embarrassed that my damn brothers and cousins were in on this. There are very few secrets in that house.
Kinsley covers my breasts and moves to my abdomen.
She pokes around. “Everything feels normal. I could do a vaginal exam, but honestly, I don’t think you need one.
If your periods were extraordinarily heavy or you had pain outside of normal cramping, that would be different.
Have you ever had a pap smear or a vaginal exam before? ”
I shake my head. “No. I’ve never gone to a gynecologist.”
Haden gasps. “You’ve never had a vaginal exam?” he nearly shouts.
I reach over and grab his hand. “Haden, I’ve never had sex.”
Kinsley has her lips pursed. She’s fighting laughter.
Haden’s eyes are wide as he turns to her. “Is that normal?” He looks pale, like he’s going to faint. It’s comical.
“For a twenty-two-year-old woman to be a virgin? Sure,” she responds. I know she’s razzing him. I like it.
He rolls his eyes. “Doesn’t she need regular checkups?” He waves a hand in the general direction of my pussy. “Women visits?”
Kinsley schools her face. She’s very professional.
I’m sure she doesn’t want to make light of his concerns.
“There’s usually no reason for a healthy woman who’s never had a sex partner to start yearly checkups until about this age.
If you’re planning to get pregnant soon anyway, and since she’s menstruating today, it will be fine to wait. ”
Haden lets out a long breath. “Okay.” I wish I had a video of him in this office. It’s…endearing.
Kinsley smiles at me. “I assume since you’ve never been to a gynecologist, no one has ever mentioned the possibility of endometriosis to you?”
I shake my head. “No. I’ve heard of it.”
Haden’s breath hitches. “What’s endometriosis?”
Kinsley pats my hand. “It’s a common gynecological condition.
About one out of ten women have it. Based on your symptoms, it’s a possibility.
I’d need to send you for testing to be sure.
Since you’re planning to get pregnant, I don’t think it’s necessary to do so immediately.
We’ll cross that bridge if you have trouble conceiving. ”
Kinsley turns toward Haden. “I’ll give you a pamphlet about endometriosis.”
He nods, his brows furrowed. “Thank you. I’ll do some research.”
Of course he will.
Haden clears his throat. “Is there anything we can do to make her periods more tolerable?”
“Yep. Birth control.” Kinsley grins.
I giggle. I know this, of course. I just never chose to take that path. I didn’t really think my symptoms were so bad that it was warranted.
Haden frowns. “Pregnancy will work.”
“It will,” Kinsley agrees. “I mean, it’s hard to say what symptoms she’ll have from being pregnant. For some women, it’s a walk in the park. For others, the entire nine months are barely tolerable. There’s no way to predict. In addition, not every pregnancy is the same for any one woman.”
Haden winces. “You’re the only doctor in town, right? Everyone comes to you when they’re pregnant?”
“Yes. Unless they go to the city. I’m not an obstetrician, mind you. But I’ve delivered a lot of babies. In small towns, doctors do all kinds of things.”
“So women come here to the clinic to deliver?” he asks.
“Some do. A lot of women go to an actual birthing center in the city when it’s time to deliver.
Others use a midwife. Sometimes they give birth at home.
I’ve also been known to go to someone’s house if they’re in active labor and can’t make it to the hospital.
What I usually suggest is that pregnant women come to see me often when they get closer to delivery.
I regularly check to make sure the baby is in the right position for birth.
If the head is down and everything looks normal, it’s usually safe to deliver at home.
If there’s any doubt or complication, I recommend they go to the city soon after they go into labor. ”
Haden is listening intently as if I were six months pregnant. He swipes a hand down his face and nods.
“Are you okay now?” I ask, squeezing his hand.
“I guess.”
“Can we go home?”
He leans over and kisses my forehead.
Kinsley closes the paper over my stomach and looks at Haden again. “If you have any issues, call me or come in. I’m happy to answer questions. I know it can be scary when your girlfriend is pregnant.”
“Wife,” he replies. “She’ll be my wife before she gets pregnant.” The only thing he doesn’t do is beat his chest with his fists.
Kinsley nods. “Either way. Babies don’t care about formal paperwork.” She smiles warmly again. “I’ll let you get dressed.”
Haden is still frowning with nervous energy after Kinsley leaves the room. He helps me sit up, but I have to grab his hand to get him to look at me. “Haden…”
He forces a smile. “I’m good.”
“Are you?” He’s really and truly flustered.
“Yes.” He inhales deeply. “I just…” He steps in front of me, presses against my knees, and cups my face. “I never knew I could feel this way about someone. I’ve never experienced it. I don’t like you to be in pain or, God forbid, in danger. It’s overwhelming.”
I’m rather emotional today in the first place. His heartfelt expression nearly causes me to sob. “I’m totally healthy, Haden. No one can promise shit will never go wrong, especially when dealing with pregnancies, but let’s not invent problems, okay?”
He leans down and kisses me. “Yeah.” His lips remain parted as if he means to say something else, but then he closes his mouth and grabs my clothes.
I wonder if he was about to tell me he loves me. I don’t blame him for holding back. The doctor’s office is not the most romantic place to say those important words for the first time.