38. KNOX – DENY ‘TIL I DIE
KNOX – DENY ‘TIL I DIE
It’s so early, it’s still dark outside, but it’s my favorite time to run. Just before the sun crests over the horizon, when the world is still asleep. Everlee snuck into my bed last night and she’s still asleep, so I have to use the light from my phone to finish tying my shoes. She looks so peaceful laying there.
When I woke up, my first instinct was to gently wake her up with my tongue between her legs, but I hesitated, knowing she’s been sleep-deprived because of frequent trips to the restroom during the night. So, being the gentleman I am, I decided to wake up Jax and see if he wants to go for a run. On our way back, we can stop by the bakery and get Ev some of her favorite muffins.
Callum and Emmett are gone this weekend working on Ev’s surprise. They won’t tell me what it is because they think I’ll tell Ev, which… I can’t guarantee I won’t. When she puckers out that bottom lip or touches herself or shoes, or her boobs. Really anything. I turn to mush in her hands.
The nightlight in the hall shines in a thin sliver under the door, so I shut my phone light off and tiptoe across the room. The door handle gives a little squeak when I twist it and the sheets on the bed ruffle.
Looking over my shoulder, Everlee has just rolled over, but not woken up.
When I get into the hall, I suck in a breath after I pull the door closed. I leave a small crack, nervous it will creak again.
Jax’s door is cracked open, which is odd. Maybe he couldn’t sleep either?
Pushing the door open, the light forms a growing wedge in his room and I find two sets of eyes looking back at me.
Damn! If there was more light, I’d take a picture. Blanton and Woodford are curled up on the end of his bed, watching me, tails slowly swiping back and forth over the comforter. A second later, I feel the boop from a wet nose on the back of my thigh.
When I turn around, Luna is sitting behind me. “Hey girl,” I whisper, rubbing her head.
Woodford and Blanton hop off the bed and stretch before they walk over to greet me. “What are you two doing in here? You know if he catches you-”
“What in the hell are you doing in my room?” Jax asks in a tired voice.
“Technically, I’m not in your room. I’m just outside of your room.”
“It’s too early for this shit.” Jax grabs a pillow and chucks it in my direction.
“I wanted to see if you wanted to go for a run, then surprise our girl with some muffins when she wakes up.”
Jax grunts and rolls over, turning his back towards me.
I look down at the pups and whisper, “I’ll take that as a no.”
Just as I reach in his room to pull the door closed, Jax bellows out, “Wait! I’ll come. Give me two minutes.”
“I’ll be downstairs.”
That guy. I chuckle, hopping down the stairs into the kitchen. Even though the coffee pot is on a timer, I switch it on so the water can get hot for Ev, just in case she gets up before we get back. I hope not, but her schedule has been so weird lately. The books say it will get worse the further along she gets and I’ll be right there with her, rubbing her feet, back, belly, or getting whatever she needs. I’m so excited and want to experience everything with her.
Jax still isn’t down yet, so I open the pantry door and grab the marker on a string and mark out another day.
Technically, we have right at three months left, but the twins will probably come early according to all the books. Lizzy was asking yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, when we want to have our baby shower. With Beckett’s wedding coming up in a couple of weeks, then Thanksgiving and Christmas right around the corner, we’re running out of time.
We’ll talk to Ev about getting a date on the calendar today. It will have to be a weekend at the beginning of November.
“You ready?” Jax calls out, walking into the kitchen. He’s bent over and touching his toes when I close the pantry door.
“I figured no pups this morning. Just me and you?”
“Yeah, that works.”
“Sorry puppers. We’ll take you on a walk this afternoon.”
Luna walks over into the pen and climbs onto one of the three cots. We used to keep them in the pen at night, but they can jump over it, so we leave it open and allow that to be their space.
“Let’s go, bro!” I bounce, nudging Jax’s arm with the back of my wrist.
He looks at me, but doesn’t speak.
We lock the backdoor, then do a few stretches in the driveway.
“Ooh, feel the burn,” I moan.“You want to hit the bridge?” I ask, turning onto the road in front of our house.
“You want to run that far this morning?”
“Five miles there and five back.”
Jax thinks about it for a second, then shrugs. “Ok.”
Nodding, I run a little faster.
It’s a small bridge that he and I run to sometimes. Like one of those two-lane bridges surrounded by trees you see in the movies. It’s nice, because the stream running underneath it has a lot of rocks, so it always sounds like it’s bubbling, which is really relaxing and if we can time it right, then we can see the sunrise.
I’ve come to this bridge a lot, especially at the beginning of the year when I was trying to figure out what to do about dad. It wasn’t until the last few months on my morning runs with Jax that I brought him there. For so long, it was just my place, but I wanted to share it with him. I wouldn’t call it our place, but I wanted him to know it’s a nice place if ever he needed somewhere to just think.
Because it adjoins the woods, there are always animals and birds making noises, and because it’s close to the water, there’s a healthy amount of frog croaks as well. That was one of my favorite things to do with Jax when we were serving. When we had down time, we would both sit outside at night and just listen to the sounds around us and talk about our days with Mrs. Mary.
We get to the bridge a little over forty minutes later and run to the stone edge and press our hands against the cool stone to catch our breath.
After a few minutes, Jax looks at me. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“Talk about what?”
“Whatever is on your mind.”
“I don’t think anything is.”
“You woke me up at the crack ass of dawn to run to your spot.”
“I’m good.”
He stares at me, doubt etched through the lines on his face.
Laughing, I nod. “I am. I mean, there isn’t really anything. We just need to talk to Everlee today and get her to pick a date for the shower.”
“Lizzy has called me every day for the last week.”
“Yeah, me too, and also Ev.”
“I may change my number.”
“No you won’t. We just need to get her a date before she picks one for us. And we also need to work on creating our registry.”
“We’re not doing a registry.”
“We need to do a small one, at least. People are going to want to buy us something and I don’t feel like getting a hundred blankets. Books say not to put those on the list because people will just buy those, anyway.”
“Is that what the books say?”
I stare at him, debating on calling him out, with his stupid little face. He doesn’t know that I know he’s also been reading books. When I snuck into his room a few weeks ago for one of my latest photo shoots, I found two hidden under his bed. But the problem is if I call him out on reading pregnancy books, then I would have to admit I was in his room when he wasn’t there. So to save us all, I simply say, “Yes.”
He watches me, almost like the fucker was testing me to see if I would out myself, but ha ha ha. Jokes on you, buddy!
“I’ve been looking at strollers. Reading some reviews,” he offers.
“Me too!” I say excitedly. “We’re going to need one lightweight.”
“And I’ll want to be able to push and turn with one hand.”
“Yes! Also, one handed release.”
“And it needs to work with the car seats. We may need to get adapters or something.”
“And I’ve seen some that convert, like you can lay the backs down or set them up.”
“Like a bed in case they fall asleep. Love it!”
We both pause and just stare at one another. Who would have ever thought we would be so excited to talk about strollers?
“So today. You, me, Ev, and the baby store. Truth be told, I’ve been dying to get my hands on those little scanners to zap stuff around the store.”
“I think I’ll let Ev hold that.”
“Come on, man!”
“Knox. I know how you are.”
“Mannn. Spoiling all my fun.”
“I was going to push you in the stroller to test it out.”
“Shut the front door!” I yell, jumping up and down. “You were?”
“What the fuck? No, I was just kidding.”
“That was cold and below the belt. Completely uncalled for. You know how I am.”
An evil smile curls his lips. “I know. That’s why I did it. Payback for your little bitch ass sneaking into my room and taking pictures with the pups.”
An audible gasp leaves my lips, but I restrain my hands from clutching my chest.
He knows.
Deny ‘til I die.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He laughs, rolling his eyes. “Let’s go get Ev her breakfast, then talk her into picking a date and building a registry today.”
“I could kiss you!” I jump towards him to give him a hug, but he was expecting me and stiff arms me.
“Try that again and I will toss your ass into the water.”
“You may take my jump from me, but you can’t take my love for you!”