Chapter 14
FOURTEEN
Archer stood outside Jolie’s bedroom door with his fist raised.
He pressed it to his mouth instead—he couldn’t make himself knock.
He had breached compounds under gunfire with less hesitation than this. Now he was avoiding the woman waiting behind this door.
Everything in him fought Cannon’s order.
He didn’t regret joining Blackout for one second. He’d trained his ass off to get here, and this life fit him too well. Having a clear purpose again felt good. And for the first time since captivity, he had begun to feel useful, and part of the reason for that was the men of Sierra team.
Then Jolie crashed into his life and made him wish he could lead two lives at once.
He pressed his fist into his lips until he felt the sting of his teeth. Orders were orders—he had no choice.
He dragged in a deep breath and rapped once on the door.
Jolie’s soft voice reached him. “Come in.”
He opened the door and saw her standing near the bed folding the T-shirt of his she’d slept in. She saw his face and stilled.
“It’s time, isn’t it?” she whispered.
All he could do was nod.
For a moment they stared at each other, then she set his shirt down with the kind of care someone would set down a newborn.
“Okay.” The quiet rasp of bravery in her tone almost ruined him.
She reached for a small stack of clothes. “I just need to change back into my own things.”
“Don’t. Keep what you have on. Just take yours with you.”
She glanced down at the bellbottoms that looked like they were made for her. “You sure?”
He cocked his head. “What is a special ops team going to do with a pair of women’s jeans?”
She let out a soft snort. “I guess they wouldn’t fit you guys.”
He reached for her parka hanging off the back of the chair and held it out for her to slip her arms into. Throat tight, he drank in the scent of her one last time before she gathered her clothes to her chest.
“I’m ready.” She tipped her chin with another measure of bravery.
He led her into the hallway. Word had spread on base and the guys emerged to say their goodbyes.
Townie pushed off the wall first. “You get home safe.”
She smiled, her eyes already too bright with tears. “It was nice to know you.”
Rome stepped forward next and held out a fist. She bumped knuckles with him. “Bye, Rome. Thanks for…” She dropped her stare to her boots. “Well, thanks.”
One by one they all said their goodbyes—O and Younger, Rorke and Rivers. Even Cannon came out of his office to give Jolie a nod that held so much respect.
“Take care, Jolie.”
“I will.” The thickness in her voice when she answered Cannon told Archer she was one breath away from breaking down in tears.
He couldn’t bear that.
He took her by the hand, uncaring what Sierra thought of it, and continued on. “At the end of the hall,” he said when everyone was behind them.
She nodded.
As they approached the exit, he drew out the black knit hood. Her gaze flicked to it and back up to settle on his face.
“Standard procedure.”
“I know.”
Still, his hands shook slightly when he lowered it over her head, and he was far too aware of her soft hair against his knuckles.
The last time he put this hood on her, he’d taken her to the greenhouse. Now…it was just the last time.
He took her hand and guided her through service corridors, down a back stairwell and out in the knife-cold afternoon.
Snow slanted sideways as they crossed to an SUV parked there for this purpose. He opened the passenger door and helped her in. Once she was seated, he leaned in to fasten the belt.
As his body brushed hers, he froze, and so did she.
Instead of straightening, he pulled her close.
She issued a soft whimper, and for a moment, his face crumpled. Thank God she couldn’t see anything because he was about to break in half.
“Archer…” She wrapped her arms around him, trembling against him.
Burying his face in her shoulder, he stole another second and held on too hard. “I’m here,” he managed to say.
He made himself let go, shut the door and got behind the wheel.
The mountain road curved through pines and fresh snow. He followed the map in his mind to the town of Alder Ridge out of muscle memory, even though the team never went there.
She sat composed beside him, hands resting on the clothes she’d brought. He kept stealing looks at her even though he knew he was only making this harder on himself.
At a small pull-off on the side of the road, he braked hard and turned.
“What’s wrong?” Her voice rose a notch.
He yanked the hood free and her hair tumbled loose around her tear-streaked cheeks.
A knife blade twisted in his heart at the sight, and he kissed her with fierce desperation, pouring out every word he couldn’t say into the crush of his lips.
She kissed him back with the same grief-struck hunger. “I don’t want to go back, Archer.” Her plea against his lips nearly ended all reason.
He cupped her beautiful face. “Rules are rules,” he roughed out. “But dammit…”
He pressed his forehead to hers, chest heaving with the effort it took to hold back words.
“I’ll break them.”
Her breath caught. “What?”
“I’ll be in touch. I’ll find ways.”
She drew away enough to search his eyes. “You can’t promise things like that. The military— Your team—”
“Sierra doesn’t have to know.”
He kissed her again, a hard stamp of his lips to seal his promise to her.
She shook her head. “You can’t promise things like that if you don’t mean them.”
He cupped her face. “I never say things I don’t mean. This doesn’t feel over, Jolie. I don’t believe this is the end.”
Tears spilled freely down her cheeks—and his were too close for comfort.
“I don’t think it’s over either. I want to stay with you, Archer.” She gulped back a sob that almost ripped away the last thread of his control.
He swallowed hard. “I want to check on you. Nightly. We’ll make a plan. Calls. Messages. Burner phones if we have to. I’ll figure it out.”
A wet laugh escaped her. “Burners. How romantic.”
“I’m filled with platitudes.”
Her lips twitched at the corners, coaxed into the smallest smile.
He brushed his thumb beneath her eye to swipe away another tear. “Somehow we have to believe this will work out for us.”
She stared at him as if he’d handed her a basketful of sunlight. “But you don’t have my number.”
“Tell it to me. I’ll remember.”
She recited it, and he repeated it back to her, the numbers already stored in the vault of his memory like gold.
With something settled between them, he drove. Her phone number tumbled around his head, solid enough to his heart to make it pulse fast.
He didn’t hood her again now that they were close to town. The motel she’d been staying in when she disappeared from the world came into view, its neon sign flickering, the lobby windows warm and yellow through the gray day.
Archer’s lips tightened as he looked at the building. Even though he had no reason, he hated every brick for what they meant. Those walls would shelter the woman he cared about—was falling in love with.
Hell, he was already in love with Jolie.
He parked near the office and paused, fingers tight on the steering wheel. For a blinding minute, he pictured himself backing out at high speed and tearing down the highway.
But another image rose in his mind—of his team. The guys sitting around the common room, joking and playing poker. Sitting down to a big meal of whatever Younger threw into a pot.
He loved Sierra too. He belonged there. And he had to believe his own plan to continue contact with Jolie would work.
When she stepped out, she moved up to stand beside him.
Together, they walked into the motel. The desk clerk looked up and let out a loud gasp.
“Oh, thank God you’re okay!” The woman crossed herself and folded her hands in thanksgiving and waved them at the ceiling.
She hurried around the counter with astonishing speed and gathered Jolie into a motherly hug. “I saw you on the news! I told my sister they’d find you. I said that girl is too pretty, smart and stubborn to disappear.”
Jolie gave a shaky laugh.
Archer stepped in before the questions could start. “She’s had an ordeal.”
The woman’s whole face softened. “Oh, honey. Of course you have.” She took a key from the wall. “Room twelve has fresh sheets and the best heater. Ignore the wallpaper.”
Jolie directed a lock of hair behind one ear. “Um…thank you for all of this. But my luggage I left here…”
“I packed up your belongings and stored your suitcase in the back. I’ll have someone bring it to your room.”
She jabbed a finger at Archer. “You get her to her room while I call the diner. They make the best grilled cheese on homemade bread, and the tomato soup is pure comfort in a bowl. Don’t you worry—it’s on the house and I’ll deliver it right to your room.”
Jolie blinked. “That’s very kind.”
She beamed at her. “I’ll bring you fresh towels and more blankets too. These mountain nights creep into your bones.” She handed Archer the key and bustled away, muttering about people never thinking of blankets.
Archer and Jolie faced each other for a long heartbeat. Then they left the office and walked in silence down the front of the motel until they reached room twelve.
The room was small and clean, overheated and covered in floral patterns violent enough to count as décor warfare. The blinds were closed, but snow pressed at the edges of the window.
“One more thing.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out her phone that Cannon returned to him.
He held it out, and she took it, fingers cool on his.
“Now you can call your family.”
“Yes.” She didn’t seem to be in a hurry.
“It’s stripped of location data.” He pulled out another object.
“My camera.” Her throat sounded thick.
The woman returned with fresh towels stacked in her arms. “Here we are. I’ll be back with those blankets.” She dropped them at the foot of the bed and looked between Archer and Jolie with the sharp, knowing gaze of a woman who had seen every kind of goodbye.