Chapter 16 Dreaux Davis #2
“You can’t blame your age on being a shitty ass parent.
The only reason I’ve kept my mouth shut was that I ain’t no fucking victim and you had enough sense not to try that shit with my siblings.
You and I both know Pops would have taken your head off if he were still alive.
The only reason you get a pass is that my siblings love you.
Don’t get it twisted, though. I don’t fuck with you, and now that I know I’m not your son, it’s all the more reason to cut you off for good. “
“Dreaux, please. I’m sorry. I made a lot of fucked up mistakes, but I swear I never meant to hurt you. We might not share blood, but you’re still my son.”
“Speaking of blood. Who is my real mother, and how did you end up adopting me? Your name is on my birth certificate, so where is the original?”
She sighed, then sat up in her bed. “All I know is her name was Dira or something like that. Your father and I occasionally fucked women together. I guess it was my way of trying to compromise because he wouldn’t stop cheating.
” Another coughing fit ensued, so I waited for her to calm down and finish the story.
“We hooked up with this girl, but I realized they were fucking when I wasn’t around.
He left her alone, and then we found out she was pregnant.
She took care of you for the first six months, but then she got strung out on drugs.
Your daddy brought you home, and I told him that I wasn’t gonna raise you unless you were officially mine.
Since Dira was unfit, it didn’t take much for him to get her to sign over her rights, and then you were mine. ”
“Look, you can hate me all you want, but I raised you as best as I could. I never beat you or mistreated you like some of those other bitches out there. If Rita hadn’t opened her big ass mouth, you would have never known. I’m not perfect, but I’m still your momma.”
“Bitch, you ain’t shit to me, and if it wasn’t for my sisters, I would pay one of these nurses to inject some shit into your IV to take you out for good.
Let this be the last time you or your punk ass son reach out to me.
I meant what I said earlier. The only call I want is when you cross over.
I’ll make sure they put you in the ground like the real bitch you always wanted to be. ”
“Dreaux! Dreaux! Come back, please!”
I walked out before things got anymore out of control than they already were.
My mind was fucked up, so I took the long way because I wasn’t in the mood to deal with anyone.
As much as I wanted to keep her illness from my sisters, I knew Drayden would end up telling them what happened because he needed someone on his side.
The moment I pulled into the driveway, I retrieved one of my pre-rolled blunts from my middle console.
I limited where I smoked in the house since Promise had been spending so much time there.
Plus, I enjoyed the peace of being able to smoke and decompress in peace.
After half an hour, I finally made it inside.
I heard the sound of cartoons in the distance, and a smile spread across my face.
I couldn’t explain my attachment to Promise, but I loved her as if she were mine.
Her presence in our lives had brought so much laughter and joy in such a short time.
“Doe!” She squealed as she ran into my arms at full speed. Her little arms wrapped around my neck as she rested her head on my shoulder. I was glad I put on body spray before I came inside because she loved to sniff me for some reason.
“What’s up, princess. Did you have a good day?”
“Yes. I play games wiff Nique and Nae. NaNa made pancakes and berries.”
I listened to her talk about her day as I made my way farther into the house. It had been a few weeks since she had her infection, and she was back to her normal self. I know Peace was happy, because I spent more time at her house than my own until she got better.
As soon as I stepped into the kitchen, I noticed my sisters standing around the kitchen island. A mixture of sadness and anger was plastered on their faces, so I knew Drayden had told them what happened. It was a battle I wasn’t in the mood for, but I was prepared for nonetheless.
“Come on, pretty. I’m gonna turn your movie on upstairs.
” Dana took Promise from my arms before taking her upstairs.
The lack of greeting from my sisters confirmed they were upset with me.
I had been dealing with their emotions for a long time, so it didn’t faze me.
Instead of retreating to my room, I took a seat on one of the stools and waited for Dana to come back down.
“Why would you treat momma like that?” Dominique pressed me the moment Dana walked back into the kitchen.
“I didn’t do anything to her,” I replied, shrugging my shoulders as they all glared at me.
“You are a piece of work. Our momma is sick, and she could die if she isn’t able to get the transplant she needs.
How can you be so heartless to the woman who gave birth to you?
I understand you being upset, but this is low even for you.
” Dana ranted. I allowed each of them to speak their peace because they were entitled to their feelings.
I had no intentions of telling them the truth, so I would let them think what they wanted.
“I’m really disappointed in you, Dreaux. Momma wasn’t perfect, but she tried her best.”
“Her best?” I chuckled at the absurdity of it all. It was almost as if they were all living in a different version of the real world. One where delusions were somehow reality. They were about to blow my high, so I needed to get out of there as soon as possible.
“See, I tried to let y’all have your little moment, but you’re talking nonsense, and I can’t sit here and listen to this shit. Y’all want to make excuses for her, and I refuse to buy into that bullshit. I don’t care about how you feel when it comes to the way I treat that lady.”
“She’s our mother, Dreaux.” Dominique huffed.
“And what does that mean exactly? Huh? Everybody wants to throw around that title as if it’s supposed to hold some weight.
I don’t give a fuck about her being my mother.
I said what I said, and if you feel some type of way about it, oh well.
Y’all are older now, and I don’t have to coddle your feelings and pretend the sky is green because you refuse to accept reality.
Is there anything else you want to talk about before I head to my room? ”
“I’m going to stay with Amayah and her people for a couple of days. I don’t want to be around you right now.” Dominique grumbled as she got up from her seat.
“You can be upset all day, but you’ll be doing that shit right here in this house. You aren’t grown, and you’re not spending the night at anyone’s house without my permission.”
“That’s your problem, now. You think you’re our parent, but you aren’t. You don’t have the authority to tell us what to do. We listen to you out of respect, but you aren’t our father.” Dominique’s words strung, and I sat there stunned for a moment.
I chuckled even though there wasn’t anything funny about the situation.
“You’re absolutely right. I’m not your parent. Naw, I’m just the mothafucka who takes care of you. Y’all want to sit here with these long faces for a bitch who left you for dead, but you want me to feel sorry? Naw, y’all got me fucked up.”
“Well, we never asked you to take care of us,” Danae spat, and I swear her words burned me like rubbing alcohol on an open wound.
“What?”
“You act as if we asked you to help us. We could have stayed with Momma, but you forced us to move in with you. You took over because you wanted to, not because we needed you,” she shot back. I stood from my seat to put some distance between us and to get my anger under control.
“Bitch, are you cool?”
“Dreaux!” Dana screamed. I had never disrespected my sisters before, but their words, mixed with the emotions I felt towards my mother, got the best of me.
“Naw, fuck that and fuck y’all. I gave up my whole fucking life to make sure you were straight!
Risked my fucking life every single night so you ungrateful mothafuckas could eat and have a place to lay your heads.
I wasn’t even old enough to get an apartment in my name, so I had to pay someone to do it for me.
I had a full-ride scholarship to play ball for a Division I college, but I gave that shit up so I could be there for y’all. ”
“You’ve got a lot of fucking nerve to sit in my face and act like I’m not the reason you get to live a peaceful life.
I give you everything you ask for. I’m the mothafucka that spends my nights hustling and still manages to make y’all breakfast every morning before you go to school.
Name one game or recital that I’ve missed.
Huh? Tell me how many times you’ve called on me and I didn’t show up.
You want to say that I’m not your parent, but where the fuck was your real one?
Cause not only did I take care of y’all, but I also provided for her ass too. ”
“Everybody wants to sit here and act as if I’m not the one who held this family together.
I wasted twenty thousand dollars trying to get your sorry ass mother to get clean, but she didn’t want to.
I begged her to get better and even offered to buy her a house so y’all could go back with her, but you know what she told me?
That she didn’t want y’all to come back and live with her.
It’s funny that y’all have so much compassion for her, but she never asks about y’all.
Every time she has called my phone, it was to beg for money or to beat up some nigga because she got caught in some bullshit. ”
“It’s all good, though. The next time you need help with something, call your real parent.
” I went to my room and attempted to calm down, but it was no use.
As much as I didn’t want to admit it, my feelings were hurt, and I wasn’t sure how to deal with it.
For so long, I worked my ass off to care for my family, and they were basically saying it wasn’t enough.
Fueling from anger, I packed a bag and got back in my car.
I had no idea where I would go, but I needed to disappear for a while.
It was rare that I got a moment to myself, but it was long overdue.
I drove to a local liquor store and grabbed two bottles of whiskey and a few shells for my weed.
I made a few other stops before I checked into a hotel for a week.
Before I turned my phone off, I sent a message to Maliah, Justice, and my crew.
Justice demanded I send him my location, and I obliged because I knew he would have found it on his own.
That was my brother, and he would stop everything to make sure I was straight.
I drowned my sorrow in brown liquor and stared into space, trying my best to numb my thoughts and emotions.
Everybody always called me cold-hearted, but they never cared enough to figure out why.
Drayden’s words lingered in my mind, and they made me angry.
I never understood the concept of forgiveness, especially for people who showed no true remorse for their actions.
Hell, I honestly didn’t care if a mothafucka apologized a million times, I still didn’t forgive.
My family kept trying to give me the speech about how I only had one momma, but there never seemed to be any accountability on her end.
She was the one who dropped the ball, so why was I the one who needed to move past it?
The liquor warmed my system, and I could feel myself growing sluggish.
When I got up to go to the bathroom, I stumbled over my own two feet and almost hit the ground.
It had been years since I had drunk so much because of Doniese.
I was afraid of the possibility that I could become dependent like her and not be able to provide for my sisters.
I guess it didn’t matter since they didn’t need me anymore.
I continued to drink until my body went completely numb.
Eventually, I would have to address my emotions.
For the time being, I would use this time to drown out the voices in my head and take a break from the outside world.