Girls talk
Chapter 52
Sophia
Maria walks back into her bedroom carrying two oversized mugs filled to the brim with thick hot chocolate and a mountain of tiny pink and white marshmallows.
When she had first spotted me outside the main school building, I honestly thought she was going to drop the tray of food straight onto the concrete.
My makeup had been completely ruined, mascara tracking down my cheeks in dark, ugly smudges, as I clutched the soaking remnants of my sketchbook to my chest like a maniac.
Without a single word, Maria had practically shoved her hot dog into the hands of some random freshman passing by, grabbed my arm, and dragged me straight to her car.
She didn't ask a single question. She just drove.
When she noticed I was completely drifting off, trapped in the suffocating hallway of my own mind, she gently guided me inside her family's sprawling, silent villa.
She handed me a pair of her softest pajamas, her voice a quiet, gentle murmur as she asked if I needed help changing.
When I shook my head, she slipped out, returning just minutes later with the drinks.
"I'm so sorry," I begin, my voice cracking as I accept the warm mug, pulling my knees to my chest on the mattress of her gigantic, princess-like bed.
"Oh, no. Sophia Miller, don't you dare apologize to me," Maria stops me instantly, climbing onto the bed and settling down right next to me.
"I should be the one apologizing," she continues, her gaze dropping to the swirling marshmallows.
"I should have anticipated Vivien's cruelty. I know exactly how her mind works."
"How could you have known?" I whisper, resting the mug on the nightstand.
Beside me, Maria goes entirely rigid. The moment I had finished recounting the horror in the bathroom, her entire demeanor had shifted. Her usual bubbly brightness vanished, replaced by a dark, intense hollow I had never seen on her face before.
She stares into her cup for a few silent, agonizing seconds before she finally speaks.
"Vivien and I used to be best friends."
My eyes widen in surprise. "Oh... what happened?"
"Let's just say..." Maria swallows hard, her knuckles tightening around her mug. "I used to be exactly like her. I was one of them, Sophia."
My jaw drops. The mental image of Maria acting as a cruel, elite school bully is completely impossible to grasp.
"What?"
"Yes," she says, her tone laced with a layer of regret so heavy it makes her voice tremble.
She picks up the remote, turning on the television just to drown out the sudden, suffocating silence of the room.
On the screen, the bright, colorful scenes of Clueless begin to play—a mocking contrast to the darkness spilling into the room.
"You have to understand, Weststar Academy is like a beautiful curse," she explains, staring blankly at the flashing screen.
"When you want to be part of the inner circle—the top ten percent—you poison your own soul just to fit in. You change who you are. You laugh at the jokes you know are cruel, just so the laughter isn't directed at you."
She pauses, a deep, bleeding guilt washing over her features.
"What changed your mind?" I ask softly, almost afraid of the answer.
Maria looks at me, a sad, broken smile touching her lips. "I watched a boy almost die because of us, Sophia."
The air leaves my lungs.
"We targeted a scholarship student junior year. We made his life a living hell. We left notes, we ruined his things, we made sure he felt completely invisible," she whispers, her eyes drifting as if she's looking right back at the worst day of her life.
"And one night, he decided he couldn't do it anymore. He tried to swallow a bottle of his mother's pills in the school locker room. James found him just in time. If it weren't for James..."
She chokes on a sob, a single tear cutting through her blush.
"Seeing someone's spirit get completely broken by your own hands... it changes you. I am so deeply ashamed that it took someone almost losing their life for me to finally open my eyes."
She turns her head to look at me, her gaze desperate and raw.
"When I saw you that day with James... so stubborn, so fiercely yourself, refusing to bend to people like Vivien... I thought you could be my fresh start. I thought, if I could protect you, maybe I could finally deserve the air I breathe."
For a moment, I am completely speechless. The gravity of her confession hangs heavily between us. Unable to find any words that could heal a past like that, I simply reach out, wrap my arms around her shoulders, and pull her into a tight, fierce hug.
And a second later, I feel her shoulders shake as she starts to cry. "I'm so sorry, Sophia. I should have known what she was up to."
"No, please, Maria, don't. I'm fine. Really."
"Can you forgive me?" She looks up at me, hastily wiping away a stray tear with the back of her hand.
"Yes," I say honestly, a rare warmth swelling in my chest. "But can you forgive me for completely ruining the game for you?"
Maria lets out a wet, bubbly laugh, shaking her head. "Wow. Crying, a movie, and hot chocolate? This is a million times better than any party anyway."
We both laugh out loud, the suffocating weight in the room finally lifting.
"But we should probably text James," I add, a sudden pang of guilt hitting my chest for abandoning him at the stadium without a single word.
"Don't worry, I already messaged him earlier," she assures me, turning down the volume of the TV. She quietens for a moment, her gaze dropping before she looks back at me gently.
"Do you want to talk about it?
I instantly know what she means. And take a shaky, uneven breath and turn my eyes back toward the television screen without actually registering the moving pictures.
"You don't have to if you're not ready," she adds softly.
"No, it's fine. We're already crying anyway, so a few more tears won't hurt," I try to joke, but the words come out much drier and raspier than I intended. I swallow past the hard lump in my throat. "My parents... they died in a car accident."
Once the first few words leave my lips, the dam breaks. Everything comes pouring out of me in a desperate, unstoppable rush.
I tell Maria about that horrific day in the hospital.
I tell her about the suffocating panic after getting the phone call, and the exact second I remember collapsing to the floor, my mind going completely, terrifyingly blank.
I tell her about the endless nights spent sleeping on uncomfortable hospital chairs, the grueling surgeries, and the promise I made.
Tears stream down my face, hot and fast, but I don't even care to wipe them away anymore.
I explain that the accident happened because another car crossed the center line and drove straight into my parents' side of the street, and how the police were never able to track down the other driver.
"That's why I can't stand the smell of hospitals. That's why I can't go near them," I finally whisper, my voice barely audible.
When I turn to look at her, Maria is already pulling me into a desperate, fierce hug, her own eyes completely bloodshot.
"Oh my god, Sophi... I am so, so sorry."
She abruptly stands up,bolts into her master bathroom, and returns carrying two entire rolls of toilet paper.
"Yeah. Since that day, my world has kind of turned black," I continue, taking a wad of paper to wipe beneath my eyes.
"But how can the police not know who the other driver was?" Maria furrows her eyebrows, her tear-streaked face twisting in absolute confusion.
I let out another ragged breath. "I don't know." That is the exact question I've been torturing myself with this entire time. How on earth was it possible for the other car to just drive away, completely unscathed, while my parents' car was reduced to a mangled heap of metal?
"The police said it was a hit-and-run. They investigated for weeks, but when every lead went completely dead, they put the case on ice," I explain, ripping off another piece of paper.
"That is an absolute disgrace!" Maria snaps, aggressively ripping off her own piece of paper in pure solidarity.
"Yeah. After the funeral, and after all those suffocating sessions with my therapist and grief counselor, my aunt finally brought me to live with her," I continue, leaning my head back against the plush velvet pillows.
I remember those first few weeks, when I used to just stare blankly into the empty air, letting everyone's words go in one ear and out the other.
"My aunt insisted on sending me to this academy. She explicitly told me never to worry about the money."
I let out a heavy sigh, closing my eyes.
"That's why I don't tell her anything about the bullying.It would break her heart.She works so hard, and she spends so much money on my education. I can't bear to tell her what's actually happening to me here."
"This is all because of Lorenzo," Maria fires back, her voice sharp with anger.
"No. It's all because I don't belong here," I correct her softly, opening my eyes to look at her. "Please, Maria... promise me you won't bring this up to him. To anyone."
"But..." she starts to protest, a fierce, determined look in her eyes as if she's already plotting a confrontation.
"Not even to James," I cut her off firmly, leaving no room for argument. "I'm just going to try to survive these last few weeks. I'll help with his family's anniversary gala, and once that's done, I'm turning the page. A completely new chapter."
I force a weak, small smile onto my face, trying to believe my own words.
She studies me for a long beat, searching my face, before her posture slowly softens. "Fine. But you have to promise to tell me everything from now on. I'm here for you, Sophi. I'm staying right by your side."
She slides down the mattress, lying down next to me on the plush pillows.
I nod gratefully, the bone-deep exhaustion of the emotional wreckage finally catching up to me.
"I promise," I manage to mumble, my eyelids growing impossibly heavy.
We both fall silent after that.
The heavy weight of our confessions slowly dissolves into the quiet room.
We just lie there, our eyes drifting toward the glowing television screen until the darkness finally takes over, and we drift off into a deep, dreamless sleep.